the most unrealistic thing about harry potter

is that no teacher ever called him James by accident, or that Ron never was called “Bill-, eh Charl-, no Per-, argh!”

As a younger sister who knows this struggle all too well: THIS IS REAL. Pretty sure 70% of my past teachers still think I’m called what my sister is called in fact.

Imagine Fred being called Percy by McGonagall accidentally and then he gets so offended that he refers to her by “Professor [insert any other name but McGonagall” for the rest of the year, costing Gryffindor a considerable amount of points one at a time.

From then on, she vows to just call them all Mr Weasley.

Until Ginny comes along and she calls her Mr Weasley by accident and Ginny “accidentally’ calls her Sir and it starts again.

It’s lightly off-topic but also slightly relevant but I have long cherished this mental image of Professor Snape saying something snappish to Harry in just the wrong tone of voice and Harry absentmindedly, wearily, and completely accidentally responding with, “Yes, Aunt Petunia.”

which would have all kinds of additional ramifications when you remember snape is the only one who knew petunia personally

He asks Harry to stay after class and straight up asks him “Am I truly that unpleasant?”

Okay, okay, okay, this is probably deeply off-track, but all I can think of is Harry––who upon learning that Snape, of all people, his pain in the neck potions professor knows his aunt––has now received what can only be called a psychic punch to balls. 

How, how, how, is a teenage boy supposed to rectify this, mentally? Connect these strange unjoined worlds to somehow explain that Snape––Snape!––knows his Aunt Petunia?

“It doesn’t make any sense, mate,” Harry tells Ron, blearily, desperately wishing at age thirteen years that his butter beer was a real beer. “It just––it can’t be. Why would he know Aunt Petunia?” Ron grimaces. “Why would he want to? I mean, I know he’s Snape, and all that, but––”

Harry writes his only letter back to #4 Privet Drive, dotted with tears, and it has one line: How do you know Severus Snape?

Petunia writes back: DO NOT MENTION THAT MAN EVER AGAIN. 

And this. This. Sparks a light in Harry’s head. This is the same way Petunia talks about celebrities who have deeply, personally offended her. Usually when she fancied them and then they got married. It’s so completely clear to him, now: Snape is deeply, irrevocably, utterly in love with Aunt Petunia. 

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the statue in the bottom right is Le génie du mal, carved by guillame geefs to replace a different lucifer (known as either Le génie du mal or L’ange du mal) carved by his younger brother. why did joseph geefs’ lucifer get removed from the cathedral? it was too sexy. the statue was too sexy by far.

st. paul’s cathedral in liége went from one lucifer, whom they called ‘too sublime’ and removed because he was distracting ‘pretty penitent girls,’ to another lucifer, who they’ve left there for 170 years even though he’s so hot that satanists visit the cathedral to meditate in the presence of this Most Sexy Of Lucifers

here’s how i imagine that went down.

liege cathedral: hmm. you know what we need? a nice satan for our church. let’s ask joey geefs

joseph geefs: sculpts this

liege cathedral: no!! too hot!! now we all want to fuck lucifer! we need a different satan. let’s ask… the sexy lucifer sculptor’s BROTHER. yes. willy geefs is older so he definitely doesn’t want to fuck lucifer

guillaume geefs, who DOES want to fuck lucifer, and the only sign of his being older than his brother is that the lucifer he wants to fuck is somewhat older: sculpts this

liege cathedral: shit. well we don’t have any more money for lucifers so i guess we’ll keep this sexy lucifer

mlm, straight girls, and satanists in the vicinity of liege: NICE

@quarra

This story always makes me laugh.

Mountain Relocation

This is the lucky clover cat. reblog this in 30 seconds & he will bring u good luck and fortune.

THIS ONE!!! THIS IS THE ONE THAT WORKS!!!!!

I reblogged him the day i started treatment and 1. GOT TO MY APPOINTMENT ON TIME 2. FOUND A FREE PARKING TICKET SOMEONE LEFT IN THE METER FOR ME AND 3. GOT FREE STARBUCKS AFTER MY APPOINTMENT!!!!!

I’m convinced bc I reblogged this on Friday, got hired at a job I had a million interviews for, went on a first date that went well, and got kissed a billion times so like hell ya to the luck cat

I love the good luck cat. And we can all use a little luck

million dollar idea: instead of spending thousands of dollars on steady-cam equipment, filmmakers should just attach a camera to the head of a chicken and carry the chicken around as you film.

Fact:

They actually did that.

cannot. stop. laughing.

Lizzy.

— Ballad of the Bruised Lung, Neil Hilborn

this is the text of good fortune, reblog in 60 seconds and $1200 will spontaneously materialize in your bank account🙏🙌💪🏻😤

😪 things like this need to be real

need this energy god omg

I have to pay my rent next week soooo….. Yeah I need this.

You could argue that all people have good parts and bad parts of childhood. And that much is true.

But your bad parts should be like, sometimes feeling you fucked up, or sometimes noticing your parent was a bit upset about something and didn’t react towards you the best way they could. Sometimes feeling like things aren’t best at the moment but you know it’s all going to be alright.

Bad parts should never go as far as you feeling terrified of what your parent might do to you next. It should never be you crying in your room alone because of what your parent did and said to you. 

Bad parts should never go as far as you bending backwards to somehow try to deserve to be good enough and always failing, your effort never acknowledged, your permission to exist as you are never given to you.

Bad parts shouldn’t include violence, threats, slurs and heavy insults.They should never include ultimatums, your paths in life blocked, your desires sabotaged, your resources taken away, you being isolated and feeling like the entire world doesn’t care about you. It should never be as bad as you feeling like nobody in the world could possibly love you.

Bad parts should never go as far as you feeling despised, abandoned, worthless, like things would be better if you were dead.

Whenever you think there were good and bad parts of your parents, remember that when things are this bad, no good parts could ever justify it. Nothing could ever make up for this. And also remember, actual good people would never allow it to get that bad. And your parents were capable of never making it that bad either. There was always a possibility of only treating you good, and never hurting you so bad. If your parents didn’t go for that, they were no parents at all.

I won’t be watching the Bundy Tapes on Netflix.

Instead I will be reading and thinking about Ted Bundy’s victims. I wonder where their movies are. I wonder why their names aren’t raised.

I wonder why we don’t hear about Lynda Ann Healy, a 21 year old psychology major about to graduate that semester. Lynda worked with handicapped children and got up early every day to report on the skiing conditions for local radio.

I wonder why we don’t hear about Debra Kent, a 17 year old aspiring social worker who was known for always having change to feed parking meters for strangers.

I wonder why we don’t hear about Susan Curtis. Susan was only 15 years old and was riding her bike to church that day. She was a star on her high school track team.

In a world filled with kind, beautiful people, I wonder why we all know Ted Bundy’s name. I wonder if that isn’t giving him and people like him exactly what he wanted. And frankly I’m sick of hearing people talk about him.

I’d like to talk about 12 year olds Lynette Culver and Kimberly Leach, neither of whom turned 13 because Ted Bundy stole their innocence and their lives from them. Kimberly had just been elected first runner up “Valentine Queen” by her peers and never got to wear that pretty new dress. Do you think her parents still have that dress, hanging in the back of a closet? I bet they do. I bet her dad sits with it in his darkest moments. You ever thought about him when you hear the name Ted Bundy?

Let’s talk about 19 year old Susan Rancourt, who had a 4.0 GPA. 17 year old Laura Aime. 18 year old Georgeann Hawkins. 23 year old Janice Ott. 26 year old Nancy Wilcox. 23 year old Caryn Campbell. 17 year old Melissa Smith. 19 year old Donna Manson, who was an excellent flute player and by all accounts a bit of a goth. 20 year old Kathy Parks. 22 year old Brenda Ball. 20 year old Lisa Levy. 21 year old Margaret Bowman. 25 year old Denise Oliverson, who had just gotten into a spat with her new husband and had gone for a walk to clear her mind. Denise weighed 105 pounds. She was bound, gagged, raped, mutilated and thrown from a fast moving car. Have you ever considered what HIS life has been like since that day? How many hours of his life do you think have been spent on the floor, clutching the ring he had given her, apologizing into thin air?

These stories are real. These people are REAL.

I get that Ted Bundy was handsome and his eyes were very blue but please. Please stop glamorizing him like this. He ended and ruined lives. Nothing about him is cool or worthy of emulation. Ted Bundy raped, tortured, mutilated and strangled over 30 females, including 12 year old girls. None of his victims weighed more than 115 pounds.

Ted Bundy was a pathetic man.

Emulate Lynda. Emulate Debra. Raise their names and their voices to those around you. Honor them. They were very real people with promising lives and futures stretched ahead of them, stolen.

Please don’t elevate or whitewash this kind of rampant violence against women. I assure you the world is harsh enough for us without a new generation thinking Ted Bundy is a cool, fascinating guy.

Thanks.

The fact that the Midwest just got cold enough to kill you in minutes of being outside because of an unprecedented polar vortex means that our planet is now starting to become uninhabitable due to climate change. We’re going to look back on this moment for a long time to come.

EDIT: Ya’ll saying “it’s not really that cold where I am so it can’t be that serious” please remind yourselves that this cold snap has already killed at least a dozen people, including a 69-year-old man who should never have been expected to work in these temperatures in the first place. While he froze to death last night, the town reached its lowest temperature ever recorded: -33 degrees Fahrenheit, almost 50 degrees lower than tonight’s (February 1) low of 15 at McMurdo Station in Antarctica.

Boy, for the past few weeks the temperature has ranged from -30 to -50. I considered -20 as WARM. Also, yes, i did still have to go to school. Snow days dont exist here.

Women Self Defense in 1947

I’m not sure what’s the best part of this video: the fact that she’s in heels, the fact that she does the whole thing looking like she don’t give a fuck, that chick in the back just exercising and enjoying the show, or the fact that both men and women are observing this and the girls are laughing and the guys look concerned/pensive as fuck as they watch all their tactics get shut down like nothing is even happening.

… msties is it just me or is this familiar?

Some of these are moves I haven’t seen before.

Some of this looks similar to the self defense I learned in a course three or four years ago. It’s definitely got some judo in it (arm bars, throws, fighting to and from the ground). I love this lady. She is rad. I feel like she, much like the rad lady I had as my self defense teacher, would also warn the women that if they don’t think they can gouge out someone’s eyes, don’t start trying because you’ll attack better with something you can follow through on.

crimelords I’m sorry I couldn’t not reblog this for you

The cheerful music makes it even better

most important thing i’ve read today

How to Escape a Hair Grab or a Neck Grab ? Look at them, carefully.

tai chi pants on http://www.icnbuys.com/tai-chi-pants give you surprise at the new year.

follow back

REBLOG TO SAVE A FUCKING LIFE!!!!!!!

SIGNAL BOOSTING LIKE SHIT

self-defense is important.

Is this relevant to my blog? No. but currently there are 13K of you following me and this could help some of you. 

I didn’t even hesitate to reblog. You need to study this. Save yourself from this awful world and the people in it.

I am a strong believer in self defense classes. This information could literally save your life.

Important shit

We probably don’t deserve dogs. But I’m glad they’re around anyway.

“We are beginning to understand what ails us, and it’s not something an oxygen facial or a treadmill desk can fix.”

Anne Helen Petersen | Buzzfeed | Jan 2019

This is VERY good and VERY depressing

“The exhaustion experienced in burnout combines an intense yearning for this state of completion with the tormenting sense that it cannot be attained, that there is always some demand or anxiety or distraction which can’t be silenced,”

I just finished reading this article! It got better and better with each paragraph. I gasped several times in self-recognition. Everyone should read it.

lmao homeboy STRUGGLED

Idk who he is but I love him

This feels like a cartoon

This is literally what it’s like to own a rabbit tho

This part got me so bad i had to gif it

the muffled radio in the background and the person taking the video JUST COMPLETELY LOSING IT really make this

THE CAT SASSED HER BACK. NO I’M NOT MOMMMMM