Madness, No Method

Okay returning to boxer dream/ballerina hob. They work at the same gym. They have a love/hate no-strings-attached situationship going on. They both are convinced no one knows.

Meanwhile…everyone knows. They aren’t discreet. At all. hob’s ballet students have seen how hob gets all distracted and flushed watching dream’s matches in the mirror. Dream’s fellow boxers have all learned that the best time to fight dream and win is when hob starts doing his stretches, because Dream has literally drooled just watching him raise his leg above his head.

Once Dream returned a pair of hob’s lacy underwear in the middle of the locker room where everyone could see it! And they definitely don’t know that the showers aren’t soundproof.

Hob: don’t go telling anyone I’m your boyfriend.

Dream: as if I want anyone to know about us!! I have a reputation to keep up!

Desire: for the love of god you’re both covered in love bites that weren’t there before you both “went to the bathroom” we all KNOW and it’s HORRIBLE

Omg these assholes. I love them <33

Dream is sneaking into the back of the theatre to catch Hob’s big performances, hoping that nobody sees him (he cries after Hob’s solo and blows his nose really loud and half their friends and acquaintances turn to see him).

Hob is at every single one of Dream’s fights, pretending to trash talk him - unfortunately everyone can see that he also has his hand on Dream’s arse.

They're the definition of "angrily holding hands". When people see them waiting for the bus or getting coffee they're always squabbling and annoying each other. It's OBVIOUSLY their love language, no one is buying the idea that they hate each other.

They're still in denial after multiple sets of people have walked in on them in bed together, cuddling. Sometimes doing more than cuddling...

"I can't believe they saw me sucking your cock, this is so annoying! They're going to think I'm your bitch or something!"

"You are my bitch, Hob."

"Oh my god, SHUT UP."

*gross kissing noises*

Dream is depressed and self destructive, so he often goes out to clubs and bars and ends up going home with shitty guys who are mean and rough and don’t treat him well.

Then one night, he makes the “mistake” of going home with Hob. And Hob keeps kissing him, and asking him how he likes to be touched and insisting on a safeword? Aftercare?? What’s that???

Hob’s big heart is immediately smitten like “oh no I need to protect this abused stray cat man”. So he makes sure that no matter how baffled Dream is by the whole experience he still has an amazing time (he actually feels better than when he hooks up with shitty guys?? Weird) so it’s easy to convince him they should meet up again.

So they do and it’s always good for both of them, and then suddenly Dream is staying the night and Hob is making him breakfast, and they’re meeting for dinner before having sex and holding hands when they walk home and Dream stops flinching when Hob comes up to wrap his arms around him from behind and he’s making Hob’s tea the way he knows he likes it when Hob has a bad day and oh my God, is he in a healthy loving relationship??

Hob just smiles and kisses his forehead.

-🦇

OH YES PLEASE. Trick Dream into having a nice soft relationship pls <333

I'm just imagining Dream sitting down with Death and he's like "my sister. I find myself confused. Am I. In a relationship with Hob? Are we blissfully happy together? Or am i merely imposing my own wants and desires onto my friendship with Hob? Does he, in fact, like me????" And Death is just gaping like "oh my god Dream yes he is in love with you YES you're in a relationship, I wouldn't be surprised if he proposes soon!!!! You're so fucking stupid!!!!!!"

And Dream goes home and points at Hob accusingly. "You. You are in love with me!"

And Hob doesn't laugh, although he wants to. He just pulls Dream in for a cuddle and kiss and takes him off to have a bubble bath until he's calmed down from feeling overwhelmed. Dream never used to let himself have bubble baths, or hugs. Hob is very good to him.

After the bath and more cuddles and a little walk around the block just to get some air, Hob tucks Dream into his lap. And Dream looks up, maybe laughing a bit.

"I think I would like to stay forever." He says. And Hob squeezes him tight.

"I was so hoping you would. Let's get a takeaway, love. And then I'll suck your cock and we'll go to bed."

and suddenly Dream doesn't want to destroy himself half as much as he used to <3