@newtofthesea / newtofthesea.tumblr.com
it's funny how people will judge the fuck out of me for moving on and becoming who I want to fucking be. I love who I am. I don't have time to mold myself into something I'm not just to comfort and ease the pain of others. you wanna fucking make this decision to ignore me and just leave it at that fine. I'm ready to move on again and you're choosing to watch me walk away. don't fucking say I was the one who gave up.
Every now and then I still think of you and hope you're doing well. I wish the best for you.
I really appreciate this. Thank you. And whoever you are, I genuinely hope you're doing well. Let's talk, if you're willing.
I deserved more than this. fuck you.
the older i get the more sensitive i become to warm genuine words, like wow you really think that kindly of me? hold up, lemme cry
I just don't understand. Like. You tell me to be open and communicate. And I did. I told you my true honest feelings and you left me hanging and now you're dating your best friend and and and I feel like I want to be so fucking happy for you but you left me hanging. and still when I bring it up again, you left me hanging. we don't fucking talk about the important things. and I've tried. so don't fucking tell me to communicate better with you. seriously.
lmao. you literally don't even fucking care about me. like. you got time to hang out with everyone but me. got time to talk to everyone but me. like? lol. whatever dude.
you know. I might just kill myself Wednesday.
the realization of scrubbing the floor and almost passing out meaning my eating disorder is getting bad again....
this really sent me over the edge. I am barely hanging on. no more home. no more safe space.
I love realizing I can never go home again. that feels really fucking bad.
hahaha the one good thing I had left is slipping through my fingers and I can't stop crying. I really am just like my mom huh?
I literally want to end my fucking life. I am not okay. I'm nowhere close to okay. I have been holding it together for so long. I am so tired of people making me out to be a vicious animal monster because I am mentally ill. I'm too much?! ITS A BIT MUCH?! THEN LEAVE. FUCKING LEAVE THEN. I CANT KEEP FIGHTING. I WANT TO DIE.
I am full of rage, panic and anxiety. I fucking hate this. I feel like I did all of this for literally nothing. I might just fucking kill myself honestly.
hahahahahaha. hahaha
HOW THE FUCK DID HE KNOW?! AM I THAT AUTISTIC?! WAS IT THAT OBVIOUS?! WHAT DOES THAT MEEEAAAAANNNNNNN?!
Starry ceilings in churches: Chapel Royal Hampton Court, Carlisle Cathedral, Holy Trinity at Old Berwick, and Exeter Cathedral.
