smile upon me

The American Dream Mall is having a great deal of trouble paying back their debts. The equity partners will lose their money. If the situation continues to degrade, everyone else will likely get theirs back once the assets are stripped and auctioned off.

It’s massive. Entering it feels like driving into an airport except the airport has a water slide sticking out of its side and a Ferris wheel protruding from the roof. The vast majority of stores were closed. I visited with the business boyfriend and he exhibited increasing panic as we progressed through the mall. Why aren’t they open? This is peak shopping time. Look, no one is carrying bags. Very little of this is revenue generating. It’s a five billion dollar public park.

The sound of the American Dream Mall is a gaggle of children on a rotating coaster car screaming above your head while the sound system plays Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em. We had to repeatedly dodge people driving around on motorized pandas.

The thing I found interesting was the interior design. We both agreed it was fairly well done. Why is it so shroomy? I liked the mirrored bull and the haunting empty hall culminating in an Angry Bird elevated above the shoppers like a god. I saw the longest couch I’ve seen in my life which was cool.

I found it profoundly disorienting. I’d think it’s disorienting on purpose to make you shop except almost all the stores were closed. Why are they closed? The business boyfriend says it’ll be half dark within a year but I’ve learned never to trust any prediction a businessman makes with great confidence.

The Giant will certainly solve the American Dream Mall’s financial problems

Oh I've been to this mall, it's whack. Some of my favorite fun facts include:

- They had to shut down the mall for a couple days because a hanging helicopter decoration fell into the pool and injured somebody

- It contains the only physical location for Mr. Beast Burger

- It's extremely easy to get into the back rooms because a good chunk of the third floor just has no stores. Prime spot for taking creepy photos

- There was supposed to be a fourth floor but it's either not done or has been abandoned, resulting in this amazing staircase/escalator to nowhere

I can't say I recommend going, it's a hassle to get to and the parking is, as mentioned, like an airport. But it sure can be fun to fuck around in there

omg there’s no body horror in your movie (me and a group start laughing and pointing like high school mean girls) 

the series finale of lost (2004) didn't make sense to YOU. i know what happened

Every protein bar is called something like "double chocolate indulgence caramel cookie dough delight crunch" and tastes like clay and sawdust

i miss when someone would post an image and then another person would reblog from them with seemingly the same image but there was a lucky luciano hidden in there somewhere. and you spent 5 minutes looking for it. do you remember how we used to play

by nuqui_herping

my favourite button ever is "open link in new tab"..

the current trend of "tumblr users embarrassing themselves by proudly announcing why they don't listen to any music made by black people" is really astounding.

i cannot help but think this is a direct result of liberal White Guilt and how people have interpreted "anti-racism" as form of cultural self-segregation - the kind of person who thinks trying to cook chicken curry is cultural appropriation, or sends white people anon hate for wearing a kimono (yes, this kind of discourse happened). like, "oh, no, i could never participate in this culture, i'd get my evil white hands all over it! it would be more Progressive if I only did White things."

if you're a poc you've seen this, i'm sure - this deer-in-the-headlights stare you can get from white people when you play music / show art / share a story / anything that is Racially Coded, this total refusal to actually engage with it out of fear that it is in some way Wrong for them to have any opinion on it. because they read somewhere that it's bad to use AAVE but the only lesson they actually learned from that is "gotcha, white people are not allowed to interact with other cultures as punishment for my White Crimes. this helps to fill up the gaping pit of my white guilt and makes me one of the Good People." this transforms their discomfort around non-white cultures (black culture, especially, i should add) into a kind of virtue

anyway if you are white and reading this. go listen to some fucking haliu mergia. ethiopian jazz. will knock your dick right off. go listen to rap or reggae or bollywood and have a genuine reaction to it - like, an actual, from-the-heart reaction. you are allowed to not like some of it. but you will definitely like at least a little. yes, you can compare it to lemon demon (or whatever) if that helps you get into it and that's your only point of reference. maybe don't say that part out loud. but don't, like, separate yourself from it, like you are seeing it in a museum and the only polite thing to do is go "ahh, huh, very interesting, so much culture here."

I did not write this nearly scolding enough.

I am disappointed that so many people reblogging this seem to have gotten the milquetoast message "appreciation is not appropriation! promote artists of color!" instead of what I'm actually trying to communicate, which is "a lot of people who call themselves well-meaning liberals are actually deeply uncomfortable around people of color and other cultures in general, so they frame their avoidance as a kind of respect so they can keep their own self-image consistent." I am not saying "aw, they mean well."

could've written it better but oh well! too late

Video of me trying to write the number 3 in professor layton game for 1 minute

HEARTBREAKING: coworker you had normal casual conversations with reveals their rancid political views one day and you can never look at them the same

I think it’s important that people play card and board games with each other

the skies in wild world

This shall not live in the tags