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Friends in Distant Places, chalk pastel on paper

2023

I must not explain the joke. Explaining the joke is the joke-killer. I will face my followers who did not get the joke. I will permit them to pass over me and through me

you are making this so difficult

i always forget that bird from starfox is named falco lombardi. italian bird. i know his home life is some bananas shit.

falco's italian bird mom: falcone when are you gonna get a real job. youre comin home all hours a the night smellin like space shit trackin martian dirt on my fuckin floors. how am i supposed to get any grandchildren with you livin like this

falco: ma i dont wanna hear it right now alright can you just tell me where the prosciutto is, im tryin ta make a fuckin sandwich ova here

falco's italian bird mom: giacomo do you hear this bullshit comin outta your son's mouth right now

falco's half italian bird dad: m'watchin wheel of fortune

my teeth were perfectly designed to tear abd rend the soft white flesh of the gentle beast known as the mozzarella

thought this was a dril tweet for a second but no this is just reality now

sample size of friends too small. what’s the best cookie (rbs appreciated)

Rolling up to the knight's guild in a chainmail brayette and low-cut mail chausses watching my fellow knights visibly fluster under their helmets as their gaze follows up to my maille voider scandalously worn without a breastplate

Glossary of Terms:

Brayette

Chausses

Voider

In what world is tall muscular man not conventionally attractive

We've all been down here too long. I truly think there's a chunk of tumblr's population that can no longer survive sunlight.

women will say “hear me out” and show u a photo of pyramid head and then tumblr users will go “this is a perfectly normal man and an ice cold take”

Dune: Part Two (2024) dir. Denis Villeneuve

Lead them to paradise.

Kermit riding the Sand Worm!