Sugar, oh, honey honey

ive never heard a british person say "motherfucker." does it even work in the accent

i think ive mentioned that im a little mad that i cant pull off "knobhead" but its a fair trade because i have "motherfucker"

no we say fol-de-rol-la fuck yer mother, like in the folk songs

As someone who lives in England it depends on the accent

"Motherfucker" is

- cringe in posh

- terrifying in cockney

- hilarious and/or comforting in Geordie

- appropriate in Yorkshire

- a bit wet in "standard"

- disorienting in West Country

There are more accents but I've run out of opinions tbh

open window save me. save me open window

The Trojans, being informed way too late that they're the only ones living in a 'feel good sports anime':

his name was actually Mr. Twitter before he was bought by Elon Musk

I'm so sorry mr x congrats on your transition

Exy fans on Twitter (championship final edition pt2)

My review right after reading it. (Please ignore any grammatical and spelling errors.)

tired: mermaids are all women

wired: much like elves, merfolk are mistaken by sailors for being all women because they have long hair and are very pretty

inspired: merfolk actually have very different concepts of gender to humans because they’re an entirely different species with their own unique culture

marine scientist: what’s your gender?

merperson: what’s a gender

marine scientist: like, are you a man or a woman?

merperson: i’m merfolk

marine scientist: no, like, what’s in your pants?

merperson: i don’t… wear any? i don’t have legs?

It’s a biological fact that fish do indeed change their sex to keep the male/female ratio balanced in their school population. So this fluidity actually makes more sense from a scientific standpoint than the silly idea that merfolk are born with a strictly assigned sex like humans.

Merfolk are all canonically genderfluid and we love them for that

Human: (invites merfolk friend to a boat party with their friends)

Merfolk: oh man, there are a lot of women here. Haha don’t worry guys, I got this :) *changes into a man to keep a balance because that’s culturally polite for merfolk*

Human: (spits drink) what the FUCK

OH MY GOD

So in the presence of a ship with an entirely or mostly male crew, nearby mermaids would become female to keep the balance.

IT GOES FULL CIRCLE

two merfolk swimming into a fancy party and upset the gender ratio: “well one of us is gonna have to change”

My friend explained the spoon theory to our DM and he was like “ohhh so it’s like when you’re out of spell slots and you need to take a long rest to regain them all” and now I keep thinking of myself as being out of spell slots instead of out of spoons

It’s perfect actually because taking a shower is like a 2nd level task, whereas making an important phone call is a 5th. If you’re out of 5th level task slots, you can’t do that phone call. However you can expend higher level slots to take that shower if you’ve spent your lower task slots on dishes, eating, and getting dressed.

Browsing social media is a cantrip

I actually say this all the time!

Also if you don’t finish a long rest (ie sleep well, taking your meds as directed etc) you do not regain spell slots and the next day you’re working with what you had left over from yesterday

there are also ritual spells ! where if you’re allowed enough time and a comfortable, quiet environment you might be able to accomplish something without loosing a spell slot ! 😌

I love the additions here

And there are some spells you’re never going to be able to cast, because your class doesn’t allow for it. Sure, you can maybe level up to the point where you can take a feat and learn one or two of spells - if you’re in a campaign that allows feats - but for the most part, if it’s not on your list, it’s not on your list, and that’s all there is to it. No matter how simple it seems to someone else, or how useful it would be to you.

'you still listen to music from 10 years ago 🤨?' bitch if prehistoric humans had audio recording technology id be sat up here listening to grog and unga bunga's greatest hits don't play with me

this reply kills me 😭

this is "if you can't afford to pay your workers you can't afford to stay in business". I'm sorry, if you can't train your AI without copyrighted material, you have no business doing what you're doing.

If you are using copyrighted material you need to license it and compensate the owner just like anyone else were you born in a barn?

Saw this tweet on Blue Sky yesterday

"20 years ago we were suing teenagers for millions of dollars because they were torrenting a single Metallica album and now billionaires are demanding the free right to every work in history, do that they can re-sell it. The law only ever serves capital."

The law only ever serves capital.

me watching 'gratitious' sex and violence and ''problematic representation'' in my shows and movies made for adults

You know the Grimm version of Snow White makes more sense than most versions if only because in that version Snow White was like 7 years old.

Like imagine you find a 7 year old in the woods and she’s like my mom is gonna kill me because I’m prettier than her and she’s not kidding. You know this queen is that sort of person. So you and your roommates adopt the kid and tell her don’t talk to strangers. And she keeps talking to strangers and getting poison combs stuck in her hair and whatnot.

Like yeah that’s kinda stupid but also she’s seven. She likes apples.

Also imagine it from the hunter’s perspective. The queen tells you this bitch is prettier than me I need you to take her out in the woods and kill her. And then you see who you’re supposed to kill and it’s a 2nd grader. Like how are you supposed to react to that sort of situation? Kill a human child? No. Because you’re not a brainless evil minion you’re just some guy dealing with a cartoonishly evil monarch. Of course you let her go.

Bad look for the Prince of course. Even if she did age while she was in that glass case. He saw a dead woman and just decided to keep her. And once she stopped being dead he was like we’re married now

He did cause the evil queen to dance to death in red hot shoes though. That was kinda cool.

With the acknowledgement that I'm grasping at straws, is it ever directly confirmed that the Prince wasn't also 7?

See, I think that still works.

You are the guardsman assigned to protect the eight-year-old Prince. You are currently in the middle of the forest because he absolutely had his heart set on "going hunting", and the royal second-grader should definitely not be traipsing around the woods on his own. You let him go a little on ahead and he comes running back talking about how there's a dead girl in the clearing and there's no-one else around and he wants to take her home because she's really pretty, Hans, and she's all alone!

You let him drag you to said clearing and okay, that is one angelic-looking dead child alright, and on the one hand the quality of her clothes and the craftsmanship on the coffin (who builds a see-through coffin?) speak to potential Consequences if you simply carry her off, but also for the amount of vines that have grown on the coffin she looks extraordinarily un-decayed, so you should probably get the court alchemist's opinion on that, and there's no way he's going to come all the way out here in his embroidered velvet curly-shoes. And also this kid is technically assigned by God as your natural superior, or something.

So fine. You hoist the coffin onto your shoulder (it's not like the Prince can do it. He's eight.) and head back toward the castle, Prince chattering blithely all the way. And then you turn your ankle on a rock and suddenly there's a thump and a cough and a lot of shouting from inside the coffin and you have now become a key player in a tense political incident with the next kingdom over.

You should probably ask for a raise.

I need everyone to see just how bad Gortash is at lacing his shirts.

Look at it. Look at this man.

This man is an archduke. He's president of Baldurs Gate.

And he cannot lace his own clothing.

oh its a widesprad disaster

then you got Halsin with the impeccable ladder lacing because he already did the character growth off-screen and is just here to watch all these idiots get through their nonsense

WHAT IF asymmetrical devil-may-care lacing is fashionable in the same way as torn jeans and halsin's lacing marks him as an out of touch old man who's been living in the woods for the last century

This was awesome lol.

anne hathaway is so sexy for this