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@xmille2334

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Fallback

I’m having a fallback.

I didn’t eat for a couple of months in the beginning of the year. I didn’t eat because I didn’t think I deserved to.

Months passed and I actually started to eat again. I started to accept what I saw in the mirror. I had changed, and so had my body. I was happy.

I just realized that I’ve gained the weight back. I’m so terrified.

I remember this feeling. This lack of control. Seeing the thinspo on Tumblr and feeling like shit.

I hate my body again, and it hit me like a brick wall.

I’ve gotten a boyfriend, who I love so unexplainably much. He’s told me his ex girlfriend, had depression, anxiety, and a eating disorder. He often speaks of how annoying it was, and how much he avoids people who has mental problems.

But I have them.

I’m having a fallback, and I’m probably gonna eat very little the next months. I’m so terrified of the lack of control. What if I don’t randomly snap out of it like the last time?

I’m scared

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Breakups

A breakup doesn’t have to end on bad terms. 

It’s the most horrible things you see on the internet about breakups.

I broke up with my boyfriend yesterday. I didn’t love him anymore and it wasn’t fair that he loved me without getting anything in return. We spend our day apart and called each other again in the evening. Talking things through agreeing to just be friends. He thanked me that I broke up with him when I did. That I was honest.

We’ve snapped each other all day. We’re hanging out with mutual friends the day after tomorrow.

He sent me a snap saying goodnight, and I send a goodnight back to him. He then wrote “It’s worst at night” 15 minutes later. And I broke down in tears.

I don’t love him anymore, but he was my first boyfriend. It kills me that he did nothing wrong, nothing at all. I can’t explain why I stopped loving him.

I don’t regret breaking up with him. It was the right thing to do, but I still feel heartbroken. There was a time when I did love him. I hate myself for not loving him. But I miss him.

Or I miss our memories.

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Taehyung Day!

Happy birthday to the most grateful, funny, caring, amazing, puppy everrr! My bias in BTS, and one of my UBs. I love him so much my heart can’t contain it TT I hope he has an amazing 22nd (23rd) birthday! Our cute lil puppy who’s never afriad to say when something is bothering him and always looks for ways to show how much he appreciates us. I hope 2018 is kind to him, and all the BTS members!

Imma add some Gifs because there's a reason he was the most handsome man in 2017

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I’m so mad because this worked

help me roger

Reblogging myself because… what was that? Five minutes?

O_O

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riskpig

………my friend has made me curious

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maryburgers

help me roger

Update: after I reblogged this someone messaged me offering me tickets to the sold out Hausu screening with a Q&A and autograph session with the director

These never work for me, but here’s to trying.

  1. I don’t believe in these things
  2. But last time I reblogged one ten/fifteen minutes later I got a call offering me a job
  3. But I reblogged it because I was waiting on hearing back from the job. So there you go.
  4. Roger is cute.

Eh Roger is cute I might as well

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secondlina

That fish is so happy it makes me happy.

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cinnappo

Reblogging myself because I reblogged this yesterday and got promoted today!

oh what the hell…lol.

this is important

This anatomy test tomorrow lol

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1111ljk

pleathe

I’m reblogging because this is the cutest happiest fish ever…

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reblogged
Anonymous asked:

What do you like to do when you have free time to yourself?

Somin: watching movies or resting at home or exercise

Jseph: i really like watching 80-90′s romantic comedies like Notting Hill and When Harry Met Sally

Jiwoo: reading books, finding new music, watching movies, and shopping

BM: study music production working out, and these days i like looking at home interior…

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reblogged

Not So Magical Prom Night

Group/Member: BTS/Taehyung

Words: 933

Genre/Warnings: fluff

Summary: Taehyung and y/n’s prom doesn’t exactly go as it’s supposed to

Request: @juliesandro

A/N: So this is based off of my prom experience. I didn’t even want to go, but two of my friends, my mom, and my memaw all said “you have to go or you’re gonna regret it”. I regret going and I doubt I would have had any negative consequences of not going but oh well. Hope you enjoy!

“Okay, one more picture!” Your photographer cousin insists, although you had already taken at least 50. You quickly put on your smile and lean closer to Taehyung, hoping that the picture will be done quickly. “And done.”

“Oh, thank god!” You mutter, glad to finally relax your facial muscles. You turn to your boyfriend. “I don’t know how you’re able to do that on a regular basis.”

“You get used to it after a few times.” He rubs your back as you walk back to your family.

“Okay, have fun, don’t get in too much trouble, and come home as soon as it’s over.” Your mom reminds you. “Oh, do you need money for dinner?”

“Don’t worry, Ms. Y/L/N, I’ll be paying for her.” He smiles at your mom before grabbing your hand. “You ready to go?”

“God, yes.” You say, thankful that your mom has yet to embarrass you, but wanting to leave before she gets the chance to. “Bye, Mom!” You wave as Taehyung pulls you towards his car. “So where are we going?” You ask after the both of you are settled in your seats.

“To your favorite restaurant.” He says vaguely, but you know exactly where he’s talking about.

“Naru?” You think about the Japanese-Korean restaurant. (a/n: actual restaurant in my hometown where my friends and I went for our pre-prom dinner)

“Uh-huh~” He hums, pulling out of the parking lot. “It’s never busy, so I thought it would be a nice place to go.” He pulls your hand up to his mouth and presses a kiss to your knuckles as a smile sticks itself to your face. That smile drops as you pull into the nearly full parking lot of the restaurant. “So much for it not being busy.” He mutters as he parks the car.

Although the restaurant is very full, a situation that you have never seen in your years of going to the restaurant, the two of you are seated and have your orders taken very quickly. The downside? Everyone in the restaurant keeps staring at the two of you because of how dressed up you are. “I mean, they do know that it’s prom night, they don’t need to stare at us like we’re freaks.” You say after your food is brought out to you.

“They’re staring because you are the most beautiful person in here and everyone either wants to be you or date you. Unlucky for them, lucky for me.” Taehyung says, taking a bite of his food as you feel your face begin to heat up.

“Stop it.” You mumble, shoving food in your mouth to cover how flustered you are.

Once you finish your meal, you drive to the country club where the dance is being held. When you’re inside, you see one half of the main room is full of people dancing, the other half full of people just standing or sitting around and mingling, and a small room off to the side has a refreshments table with a chocolate fountain as the main piece. The two of you walk around, saying hi to your friends as you see them as you wait for a slow song to play so the two of you can dance. However, that doesn’t seem to happen. After an hour and a half of sitting around and listening to Uptown Funk play for the 6th time, you begin to realize your school probably isn’t going to play a slow song in order to keep things “appropriate” at the dance, considering they censored the word damn in Uptown Funk. You look over and see Taehyung slightly bouncing his leg, something he does when he’s either agitated, bored, restless, or a mixture of any or all of the above. You reach over and place your hand in his, causing him to turn his head towards you. “You wanna duck out of here?”

“Are you sure? I know you were looking forward to this.”

You shrug. “It’s kind of boring.” You look around at the amount of people, none of which seem to be having the time of their life, before looking back at him. “We could go see that new Disney movie instead.”

He smiles at you. “Let’s go.” He pulls you up and leads you towards the exit.

Along the way, you run into one of your friends. “Hey, y/f/n.” You stop to talk to them. “Tae and I are heading out to see a movie, you wanna come with?”

They shrug. “I’ll have to talk to my girlfriend and see what she wants to do. We may or may not meet you there.” You nod and say bye before walking out to Taehyung’s car.

The two of you approach the ticket counter, Taehyung already pulling out his wallet. “Uh, don’t the two of y’all have somewhere else to be?” The worker says jokingly.

“It was kind of boring. We’d rather come watch a movie.” The worker laughs. After the two of you get your tickets and some snacks, you enter the theater and find to not very much surprise that you have the theater to yourselves. You pick the best seats, right in the center of both the screen and the theater itself. As you get settled, you feel your phone buzz. You pull it out and start giggling.

“What is it?” Taehyung inquire, shoving a handful of popcorn in his mouth.

“Y/F/N just texted me. They said they wished they took us up on their offer because the DJ is having technical difficulties so they’re without music until a new laptop arrives.”

“Oh, poor them.” Taehyung says with not very much feeling before taking a sip of his drink.

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