Resident Lurker Since 2014

This bloodweave art dump has it all: The price of devotion, the serenity of simple touches, cat to cat communication and iasip redraws with slightly altered dialogue

Boyfriends

I saw god cry in the reflection of my enemies. like who the fuck says this shit

Shoutout to Baldurs Gate 3 for having a magical girl transformation sequence but instead of a teenager in a short skirt it's a lesbian aasimar paladin in full plate about to open 13 cans of fucking whoop ass

Talking about Harvest Moon/Story of Seasons with people who have never played it is fun because they assume it’s a cute, innocent farming game, and for the most part it is, but also in HMDS

-you can let your dog attack the mayor at the beginning of the game and presumably kill him (the credits roll immediately afterwards and the screen fades to red in the European version)

-you can poison the entire town at the Harvest Festival (again with the potential for an immediate game over if you submit a level 100 poison mushroom)

-you can fight the girls behind your dog house at 4:44 AM

-one of the bachelorettes requires you to kill 50 animals to marry her

-depending on where you pass out, the villagers can steal up to half of your money

-the mines are filled with dark creatures you have to fight, including a dark version of yourself

-this one's FoMT and not DS, but if you pass out while the hospital bed is being used by another character, you get a cutscene of the doctor shoving him and then the nurse dragging him away so you can use the bed

And half of that sounds like rumors you’d read on game forums, but nope, that’s just Harvest Moon baby!

these are amazing and somehow there’s still more

- there’s a dream scene where you bring one of your sheep into the mines where all of the girls are waiting. they all take turns saying “Meat medley.” then you shove the sheep towards them, the screen fades to black and you hear chopping noises and when it fades back in, you’re all holding sheep and take turns saying “Thank you for the meal” before eating them

- the bachelorette who requires you to sacrifice 50 animals also requires you to poison for 5 years at the harvest festival. both of those are just to see her second heart event. one of her marriage requirements is to give her a total of 10,000 gifts… one at a time (the most cruel)

- in the boy version, the NA publisher initially messed up the counter for animals killed which made it impossible to marry her even if you met the requirements. also the counter for items shipped doesn’t count a digsite item even if you ship it and buckwheat flour is unobtainable so you can’t marry the goddess either, since she needs you to 100% your shipping list

- you can marry a mermaid, but you need to build a pond for her. it’s also possible for the pond to be destroyed by a typhoon, if that happens your wife is just gone (she’ll still show up for family events / festivals though. if she blows away before she gets pregnant then you MIGHT have difficulty having a child)

- everyone in the game is a “descendant” of physically identical characters from A Wonderful Life and Friebds of Mineral Town. …including married couples who are descended from the married couples. the EN localization also gave them identical names to their “ancestors” but kept the dialogue where they speak in third person about someone with their name

- in the girl version there’s a phone order clothes shop, you can marry the salesman if you talk to him enough times (another instant game over)

- there were so many glitches in the first NA release of hmds that it puts bethesda to shame: saving your file in any screen that had moving characters can corrupt your save file (this game infected me with paranoid frequent multi track saving syndrome) getting 1 billion gold from hiring the fishing team in winter (WHY and HOW this glitch occurs is still an actual unsolved mystery that no one has yet cracked. the trigger is known but the process of the glitch is an enigma) horse milking, invisible horse, Oops All Leias, glitch that causes the entire town to be devoid of life until you throw your dog ball into the pond to force thomas to retrieve it (along with the rest of the hostage npcs), glitch that causes your wife and child to disappear if you play a game with the cursed bear (i’m amazed this isn’t intentional) that’s all i can think of PLEASE add more i know there’s more

even beyond hmds

-the entire town comes to shame you in the gba version of fomt if you buy gold lumber and place it on your farm and will call you “moneybags” until you remove it from the premises

-the doctor in story of seasons (need I say more?)

-one of the bachelors in story of seasons may have been a reformed thief and makes a very obvious sexual innuendo at one of the festivals to you if you’re married to him

-the priest in fomt claims to be an open and judgementless ear, but judges the shit out of you in the confessional booth and yells at you for confessing every now and again

-there’s a cutscene in hm64 and in fomt (gba version) too that involves getting one of the bachelorettes insanely drunk in a drinking contest, and at least in fomt version, you have to take the loser home to his wife and watch her yell at him for drinking too much

-one of the non romanceable npcs is in love with another of the non romanceable npcs, but the one he’s in love with is married, but her husband is out of the picture while he searches for something to cure her ailment, so he lusts from afar

In A Wonderful Life for GameCube, there was a glitch that you couldn't sell your goat. So it would stop producing milk eventually. You couldn't breed it like you can with the cows to start them producing again, and you could only have 1 goat at a time. So players would have to starve the goat to death to get rid of it and get another goat...repeating the process every time.

Oh yeah, and if one of your animals dies on the farm, you lose friendship with everyone in town, which is a large part of AWL/ANWL. This got patched out in the girl version Another Wonderful Life.

Continuing on with A Wonderful Life/Another Wonderful life.

- to meet with the harvest sprites, you have to eat a mushroom. In the gamecube/special addition for ps2, the screen does this wavy effect like you are getting posioned/getting high.

- you can get divorced by being a shitty parent/spouse.

- if you are in the harvest sprites house, in the special edition, if you bother the pot in the back right corner, it will let you have a girl. This is only in the special edition. Otherwise, you will only have a boy.

- The inside of the pot is described to hold a strange liquid. It talks, and will threaten you.

- There are a number of people in town older than you, and they will outlive you.

- if you give Murray enough money to go home, there will be a cut scene in which he says goodbye with sad music. The next day, he will be back in town, having spent it all already.

- Murray is dressed in a loincloth all year round. He also does not have a house/tent/shelter. Nobody else on town acknowledges his presence either.

- You can catch Murray in your outside stoarge shed stealing food. If you choose to tell him to put the food back, sad music will play, and the empty stomach rumble will come from him.

- There is multiple scenes where daryl, the scientist, is spying your farm/family.

- The blue bar will cut you off at 6 drinks.

- There is a Yeti.

- if you marry Marlin, he will never acknowledge you as his spouse in the harvest festival cutscene. This makes it awkward as the cutscene is him yelling at you to leave as you are not a farmer/a part of the valley. Marlin, we're married, we have a son.

- This is also just funny when you are not married because it's just the yearly "get yelled at by Marlin at the bar day"

- You have to get engaged by the end of year 1. If you don't, the game will pick which bachelor/bachelorette has the highest affection for you, and they will come to your home to propose. If you say no, the game ends.

- you will never get to know what is on the tablets from the digsite.

This is tartan:

When you unlock him, he takes over Takakuras' house. Takakura does not have a bed now.

ooh love the awl additions so i will add some too

- those mushrooms you eat in order to get high and meet the harvest sprites? yeah the local 6 year old also got zonked off them

- if you show the local hippie some seeds, he’ll ask if he can have them. if you say yes, he’ll thank you at first, but then says this…

- when you take your husband/wife home for the first time takakura just… also follows you two into your house. for some reason

- you actually have to breed your cows with bulls so they can produce milk, and there’s a breeding scene whenever this happens where you hear painful moos offscreen and takakura says “He seems a little tired today… Maybe we should sell him.” and then after a bit “Whoa! He’s back in business!”

- also you can “milk” bulls. you don’t get anything but a little heart appears over their head

- if you show muffy your tools she’ll remark that “hardworking men are sexy“.

- and if you talk to rock in the summertime he’ll say “When it’s this hot lots of girls like to go to the beach in their very sexy swimsuits? Suddenly I feel like surfing.”

- in the girl version this same guy tries to pick you up to “teach you all sorts of things about this-and-that” (standard jp euphemism for sex) about 20 seconds into his first heart event. this can trigger as early as the second in game day, so it’s often how you meet him

- there’s a hybrid crop that looks like an eggplant. it works as a sprinkler for some reason

- there’s another hybrid crop that is just. sexy daikon radish. you can make it into sexy salad

- in Sunshine Islands there's a character who's set up to look like a bonus bachelorette and even has heart events but if you romance her instead of proposing you get a scene where she tells you she's too devoted to her religion to marry anyone so after all that you just. don't

- Island of Happiness begins with almost a whole cruise ship's worth of people drowning. this is never mentioned again

The thing that Baldur's Gate got right is that each companion is both extremely cool, tempered with an appropriate dose of cringe.

Gale is a powerful wizard. He uses the phrase 'pish posh' unironically.

Lae'zel is a badass. She asks you to fight her and then gets emotional because you're fighting even though that was her idea.

Karlach. Badass. But we've all seen her idle dance moves.

Wyll is this swashbuckling vigilante and he has a pose he does whenever he says his own superhero name.

Shadowheart. Dark backstory, still striving so hard for the light. Makes a joke about poisonous flowers that falls incredibly flat.

Astarion. Capable rogue and a dangerous vampire. He practises his one-liners ahead of time. Within earshot of the people he wants to use them on.

"bloodweave is old man yaoi" okay well you can pry that old man yaoi from my cold dead fingertips how about that

Marks and Rec: Misc #2605

Don't forget to feed your wizard. (Dialogue is just made up, lol.)

finding out about like 90% of bg3 shit like thirdhand whenever it crosses one of my feeds is so funny what do you mean the fucking cleric has higher str than the rapier-wielding folk hero warlock

starting to understand why this bitch hates it here

would’ve been less erotic to just have them fucking on the card art i swear

If you follow my main you had to know this was coming… anyway. Enjoy these bloodweave doodles :)

I literally couldn't love this man more

Here's the thing: if actors, directors, set designers, VFX artists and all other crew members band together to make a movie (it's a collaborative effort) then WHY THE FUCK DO ACTORS, PRODUCERS, STUDIOS TAKE THE MAJORITY OF THE CAKE

Just another example of useless hierarchies and how capitalism has permeated the very sanctity of art

“don’t feel bad for the suicidal cats, gotta kill themselves nine times before they get it right” one of the top lines that drives me absolutely bonkers bananas insane