I'm a little teapot

A note to people who may be looking for aurora the next couple nights: even if it looks cloudy where you are, take a couple phone pictures of the sky to the north to make sure. When I got up I thought it was cloudy. Luckily I took a couple phone pictures and they picked up the colors.

It turned out that what I *thought* were clouds were the pillars and curtains of the aurora. The lights here in town had made it difficult for me to see the colors so the aurora looked gray like clouds to my naked eyes. I almost went back to sleep!

Rhapsody of Northern Lights (x x x x x)

The sky last night....

Pick LITERALLY any other picture for cillian murphy I beg

he's on the case

01/02/2024

i dont even know destiel's full names btw. i assume it's like... desmond and..... yeah, see, idk. i just call them the Turbohell Crew

i'm totally good not knowing i really do NOT care

ah man why'd you have to tell me

A Sensitive Smiler Shall Inherit The Earth 🌍

as always l The Oatmeal l ⬇txt-edited

Randy Ortiz

Forever Love (2020)

“she’s got legs for days” pfffft not impressive. i;ve had mine for years

how do you guys vocalize the punchline semicolon silly-punctuation I always imagine it’s a teenage boy voice crack

extremely funny btw. gavroche is like wait this adult is telling me i CAN smash streetlamps??? and valjean is like go wild kid. here's five dollars

[does some quick googling of historical currency conversion and inflation rates]

it might be more on the order of "Here's sixty four dollars" which.... LOL

Explaining the Kendrick Drake feud to my New England Old Money friend

this man is 27

"this post would do numbers on tumblr" "that post would do numbers on tumblr" yeah they probably would. they would probably do 4 or some shit. i don't know

uh oh

you guys can put this one down now. it was funny but not That funny

you guys can put this

one down now. it was funny

but not That funny

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

nothing makes me go "ooooh we are NOT the same" quite like reading some post about how people talk with their parents about their interests. what do you mean you told your father about stevebucky. what do you mean he asked further questions

"i sent this article to my relative" "mom & i were discussing dialectical materialism" you navigate the world with such a different set of parameters than i

Me meeting a genie: Okay, so my first wish is for 1000 dollars a day, deposited to my bank account without any way of tracing it to anything illegal. I want this money to come from the ten richest people in America (100 dollars each), withdrawn under the guise of nebulous, random purchases and surcharges. It would probably be best to split the money into a myriad of smaller fees, though, to reduce the likelihood of anyone noticing. Got all that?

Genie: um

Me, continuing on without a care: For my SECOND wish, I want you to give me the ability to learn any given phoneme, so that I can learn to pronounce new languages perfectly. If you're willing, it'd be nice if it were a little easier to memorize new languages too, but if that's not cool, I'm perfectly fine doing all the legwork myself I mostly just want to be capable of pronouncing things correctly.

Genie, now staring at me like I'm insane: ......okaaayyy?....

Me: For my third wish. I want to always have great ideas for gifts for people. Every birthday, every holiday, I want to be able to come up with something they'd really like, with enough time to actually get it for them.

Genie, just staring at me

Me: I can provide you with a written document if that would help.

people like op are the ones that get memorialized in folk tales for outwitting the devil