yikes

if shes your girl then why have i slowly been replacing her parts until there’s nothing left of her original body? is she then still your girl?

I will slip through the space between your cells and enter your body and I won't be identified as a threat because I'm making out with your white blood cells (I call them babygirl) then when you least expect it I crawl into your brain and then I freak it

I made this post about myself but I accidentally perfectly described how the rabies virus works

i am seeing activity from blogs that have not posted in years, its like watching permafrost melt. observing you all in my petri dish

choose your vibe

As I grow older I feel my capacity to understand that Miss Piggy is not a real person reached a peak in my adolescence and is now on a steady decline. I watched a Wendy Williams interview and there's this part that's like "can we get a ring cam!" and Miss Piggy shows her bling and I'm just like fuck she's so iconic. Miss Piggy who are you wearing? Miss Piggy have you ever considered running for office??

Like literally every time I see Miss Piggy there's a period where I need to readjust to the fact that it's not a person, and I feel that period is getting longer and longer with every instance

now all my Youtube recommendations are filled with Miss Piggy interviews. I’m not complaining. Miss Piggy what’s your secret to ageing so graciously

It's not just the audience; professional journalists, hosts, and actors report it is legitimately difficult to not see the Muppet as a person, and it is, in fact, incredibly easy to interview or act with them once the performer gets properly set up.

Like that one time they couldn't figure out why Kermit's audio was so garbage... then realized they'd put the mic on him instead of the performer.

this has been a very longstanding issue - before the muppet show was even a thing some muppets appeared in commercials, such as rolf the dog they had a continual problem where when people directing/shooting the dogfood commercial would give dirrection to rolf that they would be speaking to the muppet, to which rolf REPEATEDLY had to tell them ‘i cant hear you, you have to talk to him’ and point at the performer underneath him rolf is one of the most embarrassing muppets to need this direction as the performer is this, damn, obvious when not on camera

‘sir, i am a bathroom mat, the man you need to talk to is back there’

I did an interview with Gonzo one time, and when I got into the Zoom call, it was the actor on screen trying to figure out his audio. And then once he did, he went like “OKAY!” and then just like dove to the floor and it was Gonzo and there was never a moment when I doubted that the dude was just Gonzo’s tech guy 

look at this cool borzoi hanging out with some white dudes

lol that’s Pink Floyd

What a great name for a borzoi.

my leitmotif is about to fucking reprise

a prayer

(when she says she likes to be degraded) you are dust and to dust you shall return

“why are you so tired all the time” God is killing me! thanks for asking

I've been waiting for him to say this lmao

He's responsible for this beauty

There are more but I don't have them

all classics

the first rule of fight club is to have tboy swag and the second rule is to be a bad person

Thank you for engaging in the mortifying ordeal of being known so that I may partake in the euphoric experience of knowing you.

Ladies and gentlemen we have a special guest on the show tonight. Swarm of locusts! Everyone please welcome swarm of locusts

i will go inside a computer someday i think the wires would be like . comfy

like this