Okay, I definitely plan on coming back asap. Gonna start working on this shit tomorrow. He’s gonna be hella canon divergent because I don’t like a lot of canon, hope people still like him regardless of that OOOOOF. Long story short, I’m back baybeeeee. Also to note: Probably gonna be making a new account for bucky too because I have around 900 probably inactive accounts following me. I’ll be sure to post links and follow active mutuals on the new account. Y’all best get hyped!

Not sure if many people are still hanging around but I kinda miss writing on here but don’t have the time for a return, might come back after I move house next month. I’ll likely be pretty canon-divergent post civil war (because I truly hate like 99% of infinity war and end game - personal opinion so please don’t come at me for that) and ngl I have to catch up with falcon and winter soldier because otherwise I feel like I’m not doing my boy justice or smth? I dunno. But possible thing to look forward to if any of y’all are still around I guess. Not 100% saying I will but I definitely miss this boy a lot and he’s a big comfort character for me, so ??????? Maybe.

“Good to know that you won’t have a meet and greet with yourself, definitely can tell you’re smart on that subject.Don’t want to create time loops and more shenanigans,” Tony paused, biting his lip as he watched Barnes. It was strange that this man seemed so much like Winter. It was simply easier for him to cling to the idea that he represented the same personality traits as Captain Barnes. That made Tony feel a little less uncomfortable with the fact that both men could have potentially murdered his mother in their respective timelines.

“I’d want skin samples. That would provide more traces of where you have been and what you have been through than blood work will. I’ll still take the blood, might give me some indications of what I’m working with but I’m thinking I might have to design a portal and that is going to take a lot more coffee than this…so you both can go make me eight pots and I’ll start after skin samples and blood work. Stay in any of the rooms until I can get this portal started and it could be days but you know it’d take a lesser man months. ”

Winter was already grateful for the possibility of escaping. Running off and not having the mistakes of his pasts hanging over his shoulders was a strong urge. It was enough that he was staying for this Barnes…this Bucky. He felt kinship, and he knew that he trusted him in ways he couldn’t comprehend.

Sitting in a chair, to Tony’s chagrin, he waited for this Bucky to get the skin samples. He wasn’t going to run off without him unless Bucky absolutely wanted him to.

        ❝-- Aside from that, it would be pretty damned        weird for both of us I bet. Ain't lookin' to confuse        things any more than they are already.❞

The focused expression on Tony's face earned discomfort from the former soldier, his gaze turning downward to avoid making eye contact - he couldn't help but feel that familiar guilt gnawing at him despite knowing this wasn't the Tony he'd wronged personally. Even worse was the knowledge that he'd been cowardly in comparison to the Winter of this universe, he'd faced the demons of his past whereas Bucky had just run and hid. Selfish as it was, it was the only way he could see himself surviving and after seeing just how Tony treated Winter he was in no rush to face that from his own Stark.

       ❝-- Take whatever you need, I'm sure I've been through        worse. I just apologize in advance if I get a bit snappy        durin' any of it, I'm really not good with anythin' medical.        I'll deal though and I'll wait as long as it takes, would        rather have you do it right and take weeks than be        disintegrated just because you wanted to get things        done quickly.❞

It wasn't like he was asking for something as simple as weaponry or other such things Stark specialized in, this was stuff he clearly didn't know all that much about. He had been willing to wait years if that's what it took. Rolling up his sleeve to expose his real arm, he finally looked back up at Tony.

       ❝-- You can take blood and skin whenever you're ready,        then me and Winter will be out of your hair until we're needed.❞

Throwing a glance to his alternate, he offered what he hoped to be a reassuring smile but he was sure it came out more forced than he would have liked.  Soon they'd be out of there and they could keep eachother company for a while, perhaps it would be nice for both of them to have someone to talk to that would understand everything they'd been through.

“I know, I’m just — I’m just trying to stay out of everyone’s way, y’know? I’m basically your  extra luggage –”

She does her best, to make it sound enough like she’s joking, smirking gently as she leans into his palm. God, she hated seeing that look on his face, even if it was tempered with something more affectionate. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t – I didn’t mean to worry you, I shouldn’t have said anything in the first place —”

Honestly, she didn’t know what she’d been thinking. Half the time things just slipped out – but he’d always been easy to admit things to. Maybe it was because she trusted him – or maybe she just didn’t like it when there were things he didn’t KNOW. Her eyes close – just for a second, one hand running it’s way down his side. The last thing she wanted to do was admit that her stomach lurched just at the THOUGHT of him leaving again.

She also knew she couldn’t just ask him to stay. 

“I’ll be fine. If you have to – go. I’ll manage. I don’t want you to worry about that —”

There’d be more than enough to worry about already, if he had to leave. She was more than sure of that, at least. 

Her attempt to make the self-depreciating comment sound like a joke fails spectacularly or perhaps he knows her to well to see it as JUST a joke but either way it only makes his worried expression all the more obvious. If only she could see herself through his eyes, she'd see she was his whole damn world - not LUGGAGE.

        ❝-- You existin' isn't you bein' in anyones way and if        someone says different, you point 'em out to me because        I don't take well to LIARS.❞

Though thankful she cares for his feelings and worries so much, he doesn't want her to neglect her own - nor does he want her to feeling as though he isn't doimg enough to support her. If that is indeed the case then he'll change that, he'd do pretty much anything to ensure her happiness.

       ❝-- No, that's exactly why I want you tellin' me these things.         I'm your partner sweetheart, I'm kinda meant to worry about        you at least a little, y'know? I'm sure you do more than your        fair share of worryin' about me.❞

And god he wishes she didn't have to but it comes with the territory, he can't just stand by and hope any threats would get dealt with by someone else, not when it could be the world at stake. All he could promise was that he'd be careful and do his utmost to come home in one piece.

He doubts it's does much to make her feel at ease.

       ❝I'm gonna worry about it whether you want me to or not, I love        you and I want to be sure you're happy. I know things aren't always        ideal, a LOT has happened but.. I dunno, just don't like the thought        of you bein' lonely when I'm not around or feelin' as though you've        got no one else 'cause that ain't true.❞

Bucky was never supposed toknow just how he handled the wounds he’d received over the years. Hewas never supposed to find out just how often he buried the pain andguilt that he’d felt ever since that day on the train. They both hadenough on their shoulders that neither of them needed to have anymore added to it. But how could he keep all of that from him? Hisfriend had just told him he would be there no matter what, that hewasn’t going to leave him and a small part of him just wanted tospill it all out. Except he couldn’t. Steve couldn’t just unburdenhimself like that even if it meant freeing some of himself from thatguilt. He’d been taught long before that he shouldn’t ever allowsomeone else to carry the burdens he’d found himself dealing with,that he shouldn’t allow anyone else to see him at his weakest.Eventually, it would either break him or kill him but he couldn’ttell his best friend how much pain and guilt he felt. Which meanthe’d have to find new ways of dealing with it. There was the smallvoice in his head telling him he could talk to Bucky but in thatmoment it was the last thing he thought he could do.

“Youdo help. I promise I’m not just sayin’ it to say it. Out ofeveryone you’re one who helps. I just don’t know how much I cantalk about it. I know it’s not healthy but it’s how I’vehandled it all since they woke me up. Guess it’s a bit of anold habit I need to break. But I like that idea actually. When Ifirst came out of the ice I used to spend a lot of time hittingthe bags. But this could actually better. For bothof us.”

He didn’t know if it wouldactually help Bucky or not, but it was better than them just sittingaround during their bad days. In the past, he’d allowed himself tosink into the past, he’d allowed the guilt to consume him and he veryrarely left his apartment. Even in Wakanda he’d allowed some of thatguilt to get the better of him. The only difference was Bucky. Hisfriend had pulled him out of his own thoughts more times than not andhis suggestion might actually help them both. Or at least he hoped itwould. If not, they’d figure it out together. They always found waysof figuring things out together. Steve just had to hope he hadn’tscrewed things up by confessing what he’d felt. It was yet one morething he’d kept to himself and Bucky’s silence was actually telling.Had he made a mistake? He couldn’t take it back and it wasn’t untilhe heard Bucky say he felt the same that he could finally release thebreath he didn’t realise he was holding.

“No, it’s not easy atall. I just find it easier to keep it all buried than let itout. And you — I had no idea how to put it. I was so afraidof losing you that I kept it buried. Before I knew that ifI told you I’d lose my best friend. Still feel the same way butguess it’s time to put it all out onto the table and hope forthe best. I’m just relieved you feel the same. Would’vefelt like a idiot if you hadn’t felt the same.”

The two of them would only be able to hide their wounds from eachother for so long and really it was no secret to Bucky that Steve suffered, however much he tried to hide it. Bucky just hoped that hiding it wouldn't make it fester and worsen, he'd seen how the events of the past had inevitably changed the man - made him something other than the bright-eyed young soldier he used to be - and he didn't want the next change to be for the worst. He deserved better than that. Bucky wanted to make sure he'd have better than that but there was only so much he could do if Steve kept him at a proverbial arms-length. It was a relief to hear that Steve knew that too, that he understood he needed to break that habit. Recognition of the issue was a step in the right direction, working towards overcoming it could come later. Any issues Bucky had himself could be sidelined, hypocritical as it might be, he knew he couldn't face all of the ghosts of his past yet. Maybe with time they'd work on that too.

       ❝-- I'm glad to hear that 'cause eventually I want       to help you realize just how great you are, an' I       don't plan on stoppin' until that happens. Anyone       else would've given up on me, friend or not,       after everythin' I did.. It takes a good man to stand       up for what they believe in, especially when the       world is tellin' you to give in. - Anyway, ramblin'       aside, I do think it'd be good for both of us. Gets       the anger out, y'know? Somewhere to exert it.❞

Honestly he'd long overstepped the point of being angry about his past for the most part, thinking about it had simply become something that was tiring - both mentally or otherwise. If he lingered on thoughts of it too long he could end up not wanting to even leave his bed for days at a time, which was one of the many reasons he tried to just avoid thinking about it altogether. Though on the days when the anger did come it was usually unrelenting, a sudden surge of vicious energy that would only relent once he'd expended in - which was where the training idea came from. If not for things like that, he would've torn up his apartment in Romania without a second thought.

Bucky could see the tension drop from Steve when he finally assured him that he felt the same and gently he moved forward, resting a hand on Steve's shoulder in an effort to reassure him. Honestly the whole partnership thing was unfamiliar territory for him, he had little more than blurred memories of the time he was a natural at such things but he would learn as he went along - just as Steve likely would too.

      ❝-- Pal, even if I didn't feel the same I wouldn't be       runnin' away from you just because you had feelings       for me, I think too much of you for that. Couldn't get       rid of me that easy. I get it though, I couldn't say it       myself so at least one of us is brave enough to break       through that ice.. Gonna have to relearn all this       relationship stuff though, not done it in years, probably       gonna be awkward for a while for both of us while we       figure things out.❞

Eyyy, I’m finally here. Defeated the massive hole in my gum and even defeated my first ever hangover (how people function while hungover is legit a mystery to me, I spent all yesterday a MESS after drinking a bottle of wine to myself in celebration of my face not hurting, only to wake up in actual hell). I’m gonna be slowly working on things, as usual it’ll be across all my blogs so I may not be immediately active on here but I’m around regardless and I’ll be playing catch-up for a bit.

@reclaimedasset liked for an Everett Ross starter.

            “If you work for me, I could forget about the damage             you did to my facilities.”

        ❝-- Work for you?❞

There's a scoff, as much disgusted by the idea as he is amused that the man would even dare ask. He's in no rush to be under anyone elses control after HYDRA.

       ❝-- That ain't goin' to happen, not a snowball's chance        in Hell. We gave you the guy behind it all, the guy who        managed to infiltrate your facility right under your nose -        would say that's enough to pay you back.❞  

@reclaimedasset from xx

        “Well, maybe I just want to make sure I include my fiance in         my decision making, y’know?”

She quirks an eyebrow up, smirking at him quickly, and winking just for good measure. She was teasing, mostly – like she knew he was. But that didn’t mean she’d been any less serious about the initial sentiment. It was fine, really. She was fine. Unsure of herself, but okay. So she shrugs, swallowing once as she tries to come up with a better answer. Something that sounded reasonable, at least. 

         “I don’t really have anyone else to run things by, that’s all….”

She’d lost her best friend in Atlanta. And things with her mother were strained, at best, especially when there was such a distance between them. And self-isolation was something Liv had always been particularly good at. Maybe’d have been better off not mentioning it at all. 

          “Sorry, that’s — like, clingy, isn’t it …”

       ❝-- Well you know I'm always happy to give       my two cents on a situation.❞

That's what he's there for after all, he's her support just as much as she is his but that doesn't stop him worrying about relying solely on him. It's nothing to do with personal space or that it bothers him because it truly doesn't but he's worried about what she'll do if he has to go away again, if something happens and he has to leave to fight. Will she be alright without him there? They'd managed it once but that had only served to make him worry about her all the more once he was back at her side.

      ❝-- It's not clingy sweetheart, that's not an issue       at all, you cling as much or as little as you want.       I just...❞

There's a soft sigh and despite the fond expression, worry is obvious on his face as he gently brings up his hand to cup her cheek. She's been through so much, almost lost him once already, it's understandable she'd cling to him but he wants her to have more support than that. She DESERVES more than that.

      ❝-- I just worry about what'll happen if I have to go       for a while, y'know? I don't want you feelin' alone       when there are all these people here ready to help.❞