baby fucking sink tony!!!!!

i can’t fuckin stand when you do so much shit for someone and they expect you to do more. or assume you’ll do something for them since they’re so used to you doing it. it’s like giving stars to someone who wants the whole fuckin galaxy: nothing will ever be enough. if y’all have someone like this in your life i hope y’all find the strength to tell them “no” or to piss off because you’re gonna waste so much money and time and energy on them for them to not even fully appreciate it and you don’t deserve that

Mexican women are so gorgeous and a blessing to the world

me: *clicks a settings menu*

my family: love having a tech expert in the house :) 

what a queen i bloody love her

Amazing but why is her foot in the bin

Anybody else got like,, rlly random connections to famous ppl?? Like my older brothers were friends w Jennifer Lawrence when they were like 12 and I just found out I’m friends w the cousin of the girl who voiced honey lemon in big hero six like, idk what I’m supposed to do with either of these tid bits I feel like I was supposed to live my life in ignorance of them

the tags on this are so funny because they range from “my neighbor went to school with tom cruise” to “my dad is best friends with macklemore”

@ktrosesworld, @natural–blues

for the last 2 ½ years I’ve had this note posted in the kitchen

but lately it’s been ignored

and after a particularly raunchy dish-rinsing session and a lot of pent up pettiness I made this

maybe now that it’s a little flashier SOME PEOPLE 👀 will actually pay attention to it.

a few alternatives came to mind:

Friendly reminder to check you’re not holding tension in your body. Let your shoulders drop, unclench your hands and jaw. Take a deep breath. Much better.

My patronus is just a really chunky raccoon. Just a big, fat little bro. Just an absolute unit.

“EXPECTO PATRONUM-”

WJY IS THIS SO FUCKING FUNNNY

infinity war part 2 opens with Valkyrie crash-landing back on the dumpster planet to let Jeff Goldblum know that someone’s been fucking with his #1 twink, followed by two and a half hours of Jeff Goldblum smacking Thanos down while everyone else looks on in awe and reluctantly admits that Loki’s self-preserving slutiness really did pay off in the end 

obviously he lets Nebula get in a few good shots. he likes blue, she IS blue, they’re both gay space disasters. they get along swimmingly.