@first-order-fuckboy / first-order-fuckboy.tumblr.com
((just posting to let anyone out there who may be wondering know that I am still alive! Just keeping this blog for archival purposes. I miss being active on tumblr and I miss the whole community but nobody’s around anymore. Hope everyone is well <3 ))
are you a knife bi, baseball bat bi, or gun bi?
((the fact that I still have followers of any sort here is really just a testament to those people that never unfollow anyone))
(513): Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
ii. questions of great tragedies (o.q)
Michelle K., Beautifully Broken. (via paslavictime)
((so tempted to give up on this blog bc the only plots I seem to be interested in are ones where ya boi is either escaping the Order, or has already escaped
and I only speak to like one person on here ever
but this url is too good to lose))
#ForceSlap
(901): All the doctor said was why
ii. questions of great tragedies (o.q)
”I’ve missed you so much.”
Hel was one of few he’d ever felt he could express himself around, and it showed. Though she’d been present before him for many moments now, he still looked to her with a mix of bewilderment and hurt. “Where have you been?” he wondered aloud finally, the question sputtering forth from the forefront of his mind.
❤ ▬▬ emotional starters to kick you in the feelings.
“What am I to you?” “If you could be with me, would you?” “Do you still think about (___)?” ”Do you want to be something more?” “I need to tell you how I feel.” “I miss how we used to be.” “Is it okay to say that I’m jealous?” “I’m so sorry I’m jealous… It’s such an ugly feeling.” ”I can’t help the way I feel.” ”They all want you, but they don’t even know you.” ”Is it okay to want you for myself?” “You’re mine. I don’t want to share.” “I want to be the only one for you.” “It’s you. You’re it. You’re the one I want.” “If you want me, you can have me.” “You can have others, but I will be your priority.” “Let’s talk about what you want.” “Let’s talk about what I want.” “I’ll wait for you. I’ll wait until you’re ready.” “You’re my friend. You didn’t know that?” ”I don’t think I know how to love…” ”Can I trust you?” “I forgive you.” “I only play around because I don’t have you.” “Name it. I’d give it up for you.” “You play so hard to get. Will I ever catch you?” “How can I get you to like me?” “Is there some secret to winning your love?” “Are you available?” “Are you afraid of commitment?” “If I agreed to be exclusive with you, would you do the same?” “Do you feel anything?” ”Why are you pushing me away?” ”The instant you start to feel something, you turn tail and run.” ”He/she/they love you, you know…” ”Don’t. I’m not good for you. Don’t even think about falling for me.” ”I will hurt you. That’s just a fact.” “You’re so wild that I want to be the one to tame you.” ”If you love them, then I want to as well.” “Your heart is safe with me.” ”You’re the type who wants to have your cake and eat it, too.” ”You’ve got me wrapped around your finger.” ”I’ve missed you so much.” ”Your happiness comes before mine.” ”I don’t mind sharing, as long as I’m with you.” “I am so sorry for hurting you.” “Can we start over?”
im fine. this is fine. im fine. han is fine. baby ben is fine. we’re fine.
Okay, Disney/Lucasfilm, you put this out. You’ve humanized the fuck out of Kylo Ren/Ben Solo. He WILL be redeemed. Have him answer in some way for his crimes, sure (please not in death a’la Vader), but there is no way he will not be redeemed. Leia and Han deserve that.
He’s yelling but he’s so scared, you can see it in his face. He’s afraid of losing her.
Also, someone correct me if I’m wrong, but this is the first time he raised his voice to her in the movie, right? All of the things you could see this emotional hot mess yelling at her for….defeating him, scarring him, humiliating him in the eyes of his Master, destroying Starkiller, trying to shoot him in the force bond, insulting him, etc, but no. None of that makes him lose his notoriously short fuse with her or garners more than a firm voice, like a teacher driving home a lesson. But her leaving him…that is when he is so shook he can’t control his emotions, he really expected her to stay and he put everything on the line for her.
You are absolutely right and that makes it all the more heartbreaking. He’s yelling because he’s scared. Reaching out because he can sense how quickly he’s losing her.
#he’s yelling because he’s scared but also bc he genuinely thinks #it would be better for HER if she just let go #he thinks she would be happier if she could weaponize her rage and hurt like he was taught to #rather than continuing to serve the same belief system that made her wait 15 years for her shitty parents #in this moment he desperately needs her and he needs her to confirm that HIS belief system is the right one #which of course rey - bless her strength - refuses to do #but tldr he doesn’t come from a place of possessiveness only #he genuinely believes he’s helping her and is frustrated that she won’t let him #frustrated that he just moved the stars for her and yet she’s still slipping through his fingers like water
