Bucky/Steve Imagine 1
Request: Heyyy request time! Stablished bucky x reader but steve is in love with her and maybe without realizing he takes advantage of bucky vanishing
“Hey. How you feelin’?”
Steve posed the question as if he hadn’t been too afraid to ask you such a simple question for the past week. All you’d done since Bucky disappeared was sleep and drink the water Steve brought to your room. You knew he was worries about you, and you knew he was hurting too, but the pain was so much you couldn’t even push through out of concern for your friend.
“Okay.” It was the most you could get out at the time, and the first words you’d spoken since you screamed Bucky’s name as you watched him disintegrate.
“I miss him too,” Steve began, “I know what you had was- I don’t want to make you feel-“
“I know,” you interrupted. It broke your heart to see Steve so broken and trying to keep it together for you. It was the type of person he was. He always had to be the strong one, the supportive one. You knew that on top of missing Bucky, it was killing him he couldn’t make it better for you.
“I’ll be okay,” you attempted to assure him, “I promise.”
You got up and walked over to hug Steve, and, when you did, saw that he’d began to tear up.
“I know,” you whispered as you pulled him close. Although the Captain was over 6 feet tall, he felt small in this moment. You held him for a minute before pulling away and holding his face in your hands. “I’m not going anywhere; we’ll be there for each other.”
“Deal,” Steve smiled.
Over the next few months, you and Steve stayed in the apartment where you and Bucky used to live. You couldn’t bear to get rid of any of Bucky’s things, and you felt it brought Steve comfort to be in place that reminded him of his friend.
While time and Steve’s company had ever-so-slightly improved your mood, you found yourself often crying in the middle of the night. Bucky’s side of the bed felt big and empty. You desperately wanted to hold on to him, but you knew he was gone. On this particular night, you were wrapped in one of Bucky’s shirts. You always tried to be quiet, but the familiar smell of the love of your life brought back the fear you saw in his eyes during his last moments. The worst part, you felt, was how scared he was. Bucky had been to hell and back during his life, and you’d done everything in your power to help him heal and feel safe. You were always where he felt the most protected, and when he looked at you in those moments you were so petrified of losing him you didn’t even reach out to touch him- to comfort him. It wracked you with guilt and regret.
“Y/n?” You heard a whisper and a faint tap on your door.
You wiped your eyes and attempted to clear your voice, “Yeah? Are you okay?”
Steve gently pushed the door open, “Can I come in?”
You sat up, “Of course, what’s up?” You attempted to pull yourself together.
Steve sat on the edge of your bed, “Y/n, I’m okay. But... I hear you. I-I know you may want to be alone but, no matter the time you can get me. Lord knows the amount of times you’ve been there for me.”
You reached out and held his hand and let the tears come. Without saying a word, the two of you knew what each other were feeling. You turned to face Steve and lie down as he pulled back the blanket and laid next to you. He gathered you easily in his arms and pulled you onto his chest. He began gently brushing your hair back with the palm of his hand as you silently cried. All of the nights where you’d stayed up until dawn unable to sleep seemed silly. Steve’s steady breathing quickly brought your own to its pace, and the warmth of his chest and arms brought you to a deep sleep within minutes.
This quickly became your routine. You slept much better with Steve there and he with you. After several months of this routine, mixed with late night chats and midnight confessions, you and Steve had become closer than you’d ever imagined you would be. He’d told you about his family, how he’d grown up the runt of a large brood of irish catholic immigrants, and you’d told him about yours.
He’d spilled his heart to you about losing Peggy, and how he still visited her in her old age, and you confessed your guilt about Bucky’s death and bonded over your lost loves.
Steve ended up wearing Bucky’s t-shirts that were left hanging in the wardrobe beside his and your bed. He held your hand during the day and you brushed your teeth together at night. Steve wouldn’t lie, he was deeply in love with you. Of course, he wanted to help you grieve Bucky, but the lengths he went to to ensure you were okay were not motivated just by feelings of friendship and selfless kindness. He would do anything for you.
About a year after Bucky’s disappearance, you and Steve were sitting in your kitchen deciding what to have for dinner.
“Come on,” you begged, “you always pick where we order from! It’s definitely my turn.”
“No way! Just because Bucky was a pushover and let you pick doesn’t mean I will too!”
He’d meant it as a harmless joke, but it struck a chord with you. You thought of all the times you teased your sweet boyfriend into letting you pick movies and orders. You felt the tears begin and cursed yourself for being so sensitive.
“Oh, y/n,” Steve began to apologize, “I didn’t-“
“It’s fine!” you snapped. Steve reached out to you and you pulled away, “I said it’s fine, just leave me alone!”
“That’s not fair,” Steve was beginning to get annoyed, “you talk about him and laugh about old stories at 3am every other night but I’m not allowed to mention him at any other time? He was my friend too!”
“Oh, yeah” you rolled your eyes, “sure.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Steve demanded.
“I don’t think friends shack up with other friends girlfriends the second they die!”
“What? Is that what you think I did?”
“Oh please Steve,” you spat, “Don’t think I don’t see it now. You wear his shirts and sleep in his bed! You do all the shit we used to do- except fucking me. You swooped in the second he vanished and it took me a while to see it but you act like you don’t even realize it!”
Steve fell silent and you immediately regretted your harshness, “Fuck, Steve. I’m sorry I didn’t mean that. I’ve just been stressed and I do miss him-“
“No,” Steve interrupted, “no, you’re right. I-I’ve been ignoring it but it’s true. The fact is, I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you since I met you. And you and Bucky started going and that was great. He was so happy and you were so happy and you both deserve the best. But after he died I felt like I’d lost him and I didn’t wanna lose you too. I guess I just let it happen and I should’ve stopped it. I can’t play house with my best friends girl and expect her to love me back. I’ve been horrible, y/n. I didn’t fully see it until just know, but I’m sorry.”
You stood there, shell-shocked trying to absorb everything. You would be lying if you said that over the time you’d spent together, you’re feelings for Steve had grown and changed. What used to be platonic admiration had grown to be something deeper. You missed him when he was gone. You feel asleep on his chest and spent the moments you lied there awake memorizing the feeling of his body beneath yours.
“I should go,” Steve said quietly.
He walked to your bedroom to grab his coat and shoes and you had a moment of clarity.
“Wait, Steve,” you followed him into your room, “I know that the way things happened worries you, but no one else could have been there for me. I know what I said but it’s because I’ve been feeling guilty because I-I love you too. Please stay.”
By this point you’d gotten close enough to Steve to feel his breath on your face. You were looking down at his chest, waiting for a response. The tension in the air made your hair stand up, and a moment passed before you looked up at him. You felt his hand on your arm and moved your lips as close to his as possible without touching them. You reached you hand up to his face and closed your eyes before finally kissing him. He moved both his hand so they were pulling you closer by your arms, and you pushed yourself on your tip-toes to get as close to him as possible before he moved an arm to your thigh and picked you up. He firmly planted you with you back on the bed and pressed your forearms down above your head on the mattress while climbing on top of you. You wrapped your legs around him and bit his lip. He moaned into your mouth and put his hands up your shirt, working his way to your bra. You reached down to his belt and began undoing the clasp as he ripped of your bra.
hahahah okay the rest is implied heavily i’d say. Ty for reading. I may perhaps do part 2 w after bucky comes back?
