𓆰𓆪『A Witness to Agony』꒷꒦
𓆰𓆪 summary : the first time you were brought to the Gojo residence,you were just a kid like the Gojo heir.
𓆰𓆪 warnings : angst,Satoru Gojo x sorcerer!reader,kinda long fic
The first time you were brought to the Gojo residence,you were just a kid,that being seemingly your only point of similarity with the heir of the clan.
You,as a member of a clan inferior to the Gojo's,were sent to serve the Gojo heir - and because you were born a girl,in a clan who counts girls as a disgrace.
Albeit the next heir of the Gojo clan,Satoru Gojo,was nothing like you expected. Even by putting aside his six eyes and limitless technique,the other heirs of other clans held no candle to him.
You learnt with time that Satoru Gojo is the master of many facades. The responsible and gentle one he put on for his family. The carefree and arrogant one he put on for the other clans and the higher-ups. And the nonchalant,apathetic and serious one he put on for the servants of the clan and residence,you included.
Satoru Gojo,unlike the other clans' heirs,wasn't spoiled and capricious. Although the servants thought otherwise. The owner of the six eyes has a keen eye,and he most certainly isn't stupid. He notices all the things they say behind his back,the looks they give him and all the gossips. In fact,Satoru Gojo notices everything. He just takes the smart route and ignores it all.
Not that your situation is any better,if not any worse. You're from a good clan,yet here you are serving the Gojo heir. No way the servants are gonna turn a blind eye on that. The treatment you get from other servants is...humiliating.
They would bump onto you on purpose,making you almost drop whatever you were holding,whether it was food,tea,or clean laundry. Worst case,you would fall. Your small weak girlish figure was nothing compared to the experienced,tall and rough bodies of them. And when you fall? They would make fun of you,insult you and mock you. You tried to ignore them,hell you did,but the effect it had did the situation worse.
"Why don't you say anything to them?" The Gojo heir doesn't even look up from his book when he speaks to you,obviously recognizing you barely,but nothing can escape the keen eye of the one and only Satoru Gojo,the treatment you get from the other servants included.
"I- I'm afraid I'm clueless regarding what you're talking about,my lord." Swallowing hard,you pour him a cup of freshly brewed green tea,set along with his favorite mochi.
"Do you..." Finally looking up,his cerulean eyes lock onto yours,the cold stare causing blood to freeze in your veins. "...take me as an idiot?"
"I wouldn't dare to,my lord!!" Panic washes over you at the mere thought.
Taking off the door of his old Japanese cup,a masterpiece done by the hands of brilliant potters,he takes a sip of his bitter tea. "You're getting better."
Your gaze falls onto the floor,a wave of relief washing over you at the compliment. "Thank you,my lord."
"Why don't you deal with the servants? I assume you don't enjoy getting such treatment."
"I can't comprehend why you're even here,brewing tea and serving another clan's heir when you ought to undergo lectures and lessons to be the heir of your own clan,which is one of the brilliant ones."
"I..." A bitter smile cracks onto your face. "I didn't have a choice...I'm born a girl..." You mumble,voice so quiet and filled with pain perking from the memories of the treatment you used to get from your clan just because you had the unfortunate fate of being a girl.
"No choice,huh..?" Before putting the door of the cup back on it,he takes one last sip of his tea,his further silence giving hint of possible experiences of helplessness. You realize that the Gojo heir didn't touch his mochi,even though it was his favorite. He drank his tea bitter,just like the taste the conversation left in both of your mouths.
The Gojo heir goes through a lot of intense and overwhelming training,which wasn't a shock at all. Of course,having the six eyes and limitless technique and being the next heir of the greatest clan in the jujutsu world had its penalty. One would see them as blessings,but they're in fact,curses he never asked for.
After learning about the times of his classes,you decided to bring him some things such as a cold towel,a glass of water with ice and his favorite mochi.
He would,after each of his sessions,shoot you a curious look but take the tray nonetheless,although he barely recognizes your presence. You're fine with it. It was your duty to serve him after all,the sole purpose left in your life,regardless of the treatment he gives you.
Daily physical training,a must for Satoru Gojo,led to him having incredible build,strength and physique comparing to any other heirs his age.
You're standing outside of the training room,a wooden tray with the usual things in your hand,waiting for him to be finished. Unconsciously,you start humming a song,one that your mother used to sing for you way before your life collapsed and reshaped with the single intention of serving Satoru Gojo. You're still humming when the head servant approaches alongside her usual underlings surrounding her.
"Honestly? The heir is spoiled rotten." She sighs,her tone a mix of humiliation and disappointment,not bothering to lower her voice. "Serving him was the last thing I wanted." And her underlings nod in agreement.
How can she talk about the lord she's serving like that? It just makes your blood boil.
"Shut up..." You mumble,your voice lacing with anger as your grip on the wooden tray become so tight that your knuckles turn white.
The head servant stops dead in her tracks. "What was that,brat?" She gives you a look filled with irritation and malice.
"I said shut up!" Your eyes widen in pure hatred and anger as your voice raises with each word. "How dare you talk about the lord you're serving like that!? If you're that unhappy about it,about serving him,shut up and get los-"
The head servant snatches the glass of water and smashes it to your head. The glass breaks and the cold water splashes on your head,causing a gasp to escape your lips. She grabs a handful of your hair and pulls them. "How dare you talk to me like that,you rotten bastard!?" Her voice is dripping with something dangerous,like venom.
You laugh mockingly at her. "What,did I hit a nerve?"
"You little-" But she gets cut off when Satoru pushes open the training room's door with a bang.
"Get away from her!" He shouts,his body releasing a shockwave of cursed energy due to his sudden increase of negative emotions,causing the servants to fall onto their knees,squirming in fear. He steps closer slowly,his breathing heavy and his crystal blue eyes filled with rage. The head servant lets go of your hair and quickly leaves the scene,leaving you alone with the heir.
Satoru kneels down and pushes your hair away from your eyes,seeing the blood running down your face from the wound the glass has made on your forehead and the cut on your lips. "You..." His brows knot together,scowling intensely. "Why did you do that?"
"They...they were bad-mouthing you,my lord. I couldn't allow that..." You voice cracks as huge teardrops escape your eyes.
He puts a hand on your cheek,his thumb tracing the cut on your lower lip tenderly as he smiles bitterly. "So you keep quiet when they bad-mouth you but speak up when they bad-mouth me?"
Wiping at your tears angrily,you nod your head furiously. "You...you're my lord...I have to..." You sniffle.
He lets out a quiet chuckle. "You're so..." He pauses,putting his hand on his chin as he ponders. "Actually,I can't find a good word to describe you with." He smiles and it's the first time you get a glance at his soft side. "Let's get you treated." With a swift movement,he picks you up,carrying you to who knows where.
You gasp,not realizing how quickly he picked up you. "M-my lord! This is..." You stutter as you grab onto his shirt.
"Hush...I'm your lord,do you doubt my decisions?" His voice is sweet,alongside with a grin attached to his face.
"No,my lord..." Your voice is quiet,barely above a whisper as an unfamiliar heat creeps its way into your cheeks.
"Then keep quiet and let me do whatever I believe I should do."
You nod curtly,letting him carry you to get treated. How he doesn't know serving him is the sole purpose in your life.
"Y/n...!" Satoru whines,sitting on the chair in your room. "I'm beat..."
You chuckle,closing the book you were reading and putting it on the shelf. "Okay,okay." You walk up to him and ruffle his soft snowy hair. "You did well today." He smiles at the sensation of your fingers among his hair.
It's been almost four years of you witnessing Satoru Gojo as Satoru instead of 'The Gojo Heir' you served. Albeit you must admit he is quite...a handful. The almost sixteen Satoru is sweet,soft,carefree and even flirty and whiney at times. But he is also arrogant,has a big ego and...when did he get so tall?
He's been wearing himself out lately,getting ready to enter jujutsu high soon,to enter the jujutsu society as a sorcerer. "Yeah,I'm sooo tired..." He chuckles. "But it'll all end when I enter jujutsu high."
"Dream on. Your problems will only get bigger once you become a sorcerer." You sigh.
"It's fine!! I mean,you're here y/n."
"Yeah,yeah. Sure thing,my lord." You flick his forehead.
"Ow!!" He whines,pouting as you call him 'my lord'. "It's Satoru! Sa-to-ru! Not my lord or anything else!" He gets up,pinching your cheeks.
"Owowow!!" A whine escapes your lips. "Okay,fine! Satoru!"
He grins. "Better!" One of his hands move to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear while his other caresses the cheek he was playfully pinching just a second ago,his thumb tracing infinity on your cheek. "Hey,y/n..." He mumbles,voice so quiet,matching the soft behavior of his hands. "What will you do once I leave for jujutsu high?"
Your eyebrows unconsciously raise in confusion. "What do you mean? I'll stay here,of course. I'm supposed to serve the Gojo clan."
"No,you don't! You're supposed to serve me!" He pouts,causing you to chuckle at the cuteness only you can see of the nonchalant and arrogant Gojo heir.
"Okay,you big baby. What should I do then?" As soon as you say that,a familiar spark becomes visible in his cerulean eyes,the same spark that you see when you know he's planning something big..
"Come to jujutsu high with me."
"You can,y/n! You're from a clan which is brilliant among the clans of jujutsu world other than the top three. You have great potential and amazing control on your cursed energy. Your physical strength is also higher than most people and your technique is marvelous! I and my six eyes know better than anyone else!"
You look down,a pathetic attempt to hide the blush appearing on your face. But Satoru's hande tilt your head up,forcing you to make eye contact with his crystal blue eyes.
"Please,y/n. I don't want you staying here. Plus,I'll protect you!"
"I will." He nods. "And when I'll make sure when I'm done with this world,you'll be kept in high regard and respected."
He presses his forehead to yours,a soft smile cracking on his face. "I promise."
Jujutsu high was nothing like you expected. You could say it was one of your best experiences too. There was only a few students in each year,so everyone apparently got along.
Satoru and you were no expectations,opening up,making friends and hanging out caused Satoru to smile more,genuine ones. He was happy,and that was enough for you to feel grateful to yourself for taking on his offer to enroll in jujutsu high.
Or...that was what you thought.
After a special secret mission,the star plasma vessel assimilation -failed- everything changed. Satoru truly became the strongest and Suguru was probably at the lowest point of his life,although nobody expect you noticed,you who didn't have the courage to approach and help him.
You thought things will work out somehow,that things will get better,for all of you.
Suguru left to follow his new ideals,leaving all of you. It was not just a little electric shock,it was like an earthquake shaking all of your worlds.
Shoko wouldn't mess around,make jokes or hang out anymore. She locked herself and worked on her new goal instead,to become a doctor.
And you? You always followed Satoru,but Satoru was shattered. He was a broken mess,seemingly beyond repair.
"I should've noticed,y/n...he was my best friend..." His face is buried in your neck as he cries quietly,the only thing giving him away being his shaky shoulders and sniffles. You keep running your fingers through his hair as an attempt to comfort him,your fingertips brushing against his scalp.
"I know..." You whisper,voice lacing with guilt perking of the knowledge you had of Suguru's condition,yet you were scared to help. How you wish you could take away all of Satoru's pain. How it tears you to see him cry like that,to be the sole witness his agony.
"He told me it's okay to...kill him...that it has a point...I should've..." He sniffles. "I...I should've..." His hands grip your shirt and he pushes his face more into your neck.
"I know,Satoru..." You press a kiss to the top of his head. "It's okay...it'll get better. Things will work out,somehow...anyhow."
Normally,he would scoff and laugh at that. Duh,he would probably even mock that person. But coming out of your mouth makes him believe in it,a tiny light of hope dulling his misery ever so slightly. He pulls back and stares at you,his now red due to tears scanning your face's every feature.
He lazily blinks,his snowy long lashes glittering due to the tears on them,fluttering each time he does so. He presses his forehead to yours and closes his eyes before exhaling a long deep breath which touches your lips,causing you to flinch ever so slightly.
A wave of relief washes over you as you lay on bed with him,both of you fainting due to the exhaustion of the curses none of you ever asked for,shattered dreams,the long lost blue season and the harsh reality unwilling to let you both escape its grasp anytime soon.
"How can you eat that?" You point at the big chocolate and strawberry special ice cream with your spoon.
He shoots you a look of innocence before chuckling softly. "You've known me for all these years,yet you still underestimate my sweet tooth?" He tsks. "That hurts,darling."
You smirk,playing with your small -compared to Satoru's- ice cream before shoving a spoonful of it into your mouth "Quit the act. Plus,that's not something to be proud of. We both know that sweet tooth of yours was unintentional."
He hums thoughtfully before taking off his sunglasses,revealing those gorgeous crystal blue eyes alongside those snowy long lashes. "True."
After the ice cream,you go to the usual park with Satoru. "What was the special occasion for that?" You ask,eyes locked onto the lake,reminding you how little its beauty is compared to the infinite ocean in Satoru's eyes.
He sighs,faking his disappointment. "Can't I take out my cute,adorable,gorgeous and extremely lovable girlfriend out to have ice cream with for no reason?" He frowns,making you roll your eyes playfully at his act of innocence. "Sure you can. But that one had a special occasion."
"I forgot to add smart to your list of adjectives." He grins,his gaze locked onto yours. "I'm gonna be a teacher at jujutsu high."
You chuckle heartily. "Can't let that place be,huh?"
"Nope." His grin widens. "I mean,I need to fix this ruined world of jujutsu."
"You mean...Suguru...?" Your smile fades,your voice trailing off to the point that the last word is barely audible.
"That,yes. I'll make sure no one in this cramped world feels lonely again. You were right,y/n. Things will work out,I'll make sure they do." His eyes soften even more. "Plus,I have to fulfill my promise to you,too." He gets down on one knee,pulling out a small box out of his pocket. "I need you by my side,y/n,more than what you think."
Opening the box,he reveals a simple silver ring. "I wanted to get you something expensive and marvelous,like a big diamond or something. But I read somewhere that these rings resemble infinite love as they go on an endless loop,so..." He pauses,taking a deep breath. "Will you marry me?"
A gasp leaves your lips,your hand goes to cover your mouth as tears stream down your face. You nod your head so fast you feel dizzy and he slides the ring to your ring finger with a soft heartily chuckle,happiness and joy perking from the depths of his heart. The heart that you've seen all its sides.
"I love you,y/n." He laces his fingers through yours,squeezing your hand as he pushes his forehead to yours.
"I love you too,Satoru." You smile,never feeling this happy and grateful before.
The last time you were brought to the Gojo residence,he was carrying you who were covered in white. Only not the kind of white he dreamed of seeing you in.
Satoru Gojo knew the gods hate him,but to this point? Never.
The cloth that covered you was painted crimson,reminding him of his misery,his silent agony and that the only person who ever witnessed that side of him is beyond save.
It was like the gods were teaching him how the strongest will always be and that he must be alone,by taking away his everything.
The white cloth,same color as his hair,now with the color crimson resting on it reminds him of his failures,that even if he's the strongest he can't keep every promise and protect everyone.
✐ᝰ.divider by @/saradika-graphics
