Axel had to try hard not to roll his eyes, greens flickering with dark amusement and his lips curling saccharin sweet at the concern in Balthier’s tone. It was almost adorable how the Hume still seemed to think him so easily defeated -- though their first ever meeting could be at the base of this quick concern -- and though the deep, ragged wound adorning his arm and his side would’ve proven fatal for any mere mortal, Axel was made of hardier stuff than them. 

Still, he supposed he could be ... somewhat grateful to the author for providing aide. Providing heat, which was quite sorely needed. Though it hurt, it was manageable -- even if it would still need to be mended fast enough to keep him from bleeding out. It wouldn’t exactly result in death, but recovery would be far less pleasant.   “ Hmm, so attentive to my needs, “ his voice had taken on its more lilting, otherworldly quality arising whenever his fae nature was brought to the surface, his nails sharp and teeth sharper grinning wide at the man’s drawn face.  The pads of his fingers drew a path down Balthier’s cheek in a gesture that could be described as gentle, though leaving behind a streak of blood -- his blood. It looked rather enticing, at that. “ But rather than worrying, you may get me that bag over there, “ his bag, tossed during the attack. “ There’s a herb in there that will stop the bleeding. “

Lea stilled at the request, blinking rapidly in obvious surprise.  Perhaps he shouldn’t have been, though—- hearts knew their last mission had been draining mentally as well as physically, and looking at Sora now it wasn’t hard to see the signs of exhaustion all over the boy’s face – even his spikes seemed to be drooping – en exhaustion he was sure was mirrored on his own features too. 

Touch was still such a … delicate issue to him, though.  There’d been a time, long in the past, where Lea had been as tactile as Sora with his friends; not shying away from a friendly pat on the shoulder, an elbow squeeze, ruffling someone’s hair or even pulling them into a brief hug.  That was before, however—- before Ansem and Xemnas and the Organisation, where every touch had been calculated, manipulative or even violent, with a few exceptions. 

But Sora had asked instead of just going in for the kill—- undoubtedly, if Lea said no, he was certain enough the brunette would back off. Green eyes searched blue – so reminiscent of Roxas’ eyes it made his heart twinge in his chest, breath hitching just a little – and when he found nothing but goodwill, a cautious sort of hope and everything else that made Sora exactly who he was, he felt himself exhale gently through his nose.

One hug couldn’t hurt.  Might as well start getting used to it again, right? 

“ Well then don’t just stand there, buddy, “ he relented, spreading his arms as a sign to go ahead. “ And don’t squeeze too hard, my ribs are already hurting enough as it is. “

“ The 21st niiiiight of September … “

Terribly loud and terribly off-key, Axel’s voice drifted through the space of the karaoke bar, joined by the equally loud and equally off-key tones of his partner in crime tucked firmly into his side, both swaying comically to the beat.  Neither Reno nor him them were actually as drunk as they appeared to be, of course; nights off were terribly rare and often interrupted—- which meant they couldn’t really afford to get completely shit-faced ( as opposed to just slightly hammered ) in case something arose. 

Until then, though, Axel was fully enjoying acting it up to the max, belting out the next line with just as much gusto—- wide, drunken grin plastered all over his face as green eyes scanned the crowd to take in the increasingly angry glares and pained winces they were getting completely butchering this song. 

     “ Ey, c’mon folks ‘s the chorus comin’ uuup~!! E’ryone sh’d sing along! “ He interjected between Reno blaring out lyrics Axel was pretty sure were not actually part of the song – too dirty by half, for one – his own grin widening to an almost alarming degree. 

Three. Two. One –

“ AYEEE YAAAAA SAY DO YOU REMEMBER … “

To say those words took Lea by surprise was a vast understatement. As if hit by a freezing spell, his arm stopped mid motion, head swiveling towards Ienzo to stare at him with wide, uncertain eyes.  Can I trust you?  In its essence a simple question, needing merely a yes or no reply ——- but in truth …

In truth, he didn’t know.  With everything that has happened between them, this tentative attempt at a friendship still so fragile and new, apologies said but issues far from resolved, was there space for trust?  Could Lea trust Ienzo? Could he trust himself? Was it really up to him to answer this? But well, he was trying to be better too, trying to face all the difficulties that came with having his heart back after ten years of nothing, the good and the bad, trying to make up for all the shit he’d wrought; and perhaps he owed Ienzo a little more consideration to try than most. 

“ I … I’d like to think so. Yeah. I mean, I am walking the path of light now and all. Savior of the masses, doer of good, “ interjecting a bit of self-deprecating humour into his tone, he let the corner of his mouth quirk, before he sobered up again. “ At least, if anythin’, I think I’d like to be able to earn it. “

It’s not working, it’s not working no matter how hard he tries, all his nerves scraped raw, all that balled up anger, self loathing, guilt and fear he’s tried for weeks to control, to ignore, to subjugate by focusing on his training crowding his mind, his thoughts, taking hold of his lungs and his heart until the frantic beat of it is all he hears, head spinning from lack of oxygen because he somehow can’t seem to make his keyblade appear like it should.  

Rationally, Lea knows -- or would know -- that it might come from overthinking the entire affair; knows it’s an instinct and not something to force.  But the bigger part, that part currently overwhelmed by everything he’s been keeping down can’t help but believe that this will be the moment they’ll finally come to their senses about him; the moment they’ll finally decide he’s not cut out for this after all, not deserving of a chance to redeem himself for his past mistakes, not fit to be a hero. 

Just another failure. 

Over the ringing in his ears and the horribly wheezing breaths he’s trying to force past constricted lungs, he doesn’t hear Kairi’s words until she’s got a hand on his shoulder, making him look up into her slightly stricken features, a concerned gaze -- when did he end up on his knees? -- his hand automatically reaching up to curl around her arm in an effort to ground himself somehow.  Just breathe, she says, and he forces another breath past, and another, and another until the pressure starts to ease and the air flows freer. 

“ I’m fine, it’s okay, I’m good, “ he rasps at long last, even though he feels far from; shaky and slightly nauseous, his head swimming, body winding down from the sudden spike in adrenaline. He’s sure he’ll feel more than embarrassed about this later, considering what follows next, but at the moment his mind feels oddly, blessedly blank.  “ Just ... just don’t go yet. Please. “

     What a thing to ask ... and Axel wasn’t sure which option was worse -- whether the reason prompting that question was because his employer was simply perceptive ( too curious ) or whether it was just that plain to see.

     Every day. That would be the truth.  Even when he’d been laying low, even when he’d been making a name and reputation in other cities, even when he’d been traipsing around the continents looking for any hint, any sign, any rumour of another finger.  Wondering how he was doing, what he was thinking, whether he was still thinking of Axel too ... 

    Though with the way he’d left, he didn’t think any of Saix thoughts towards him would be very charitable. Gaia if he didn’t still feel guilty about that; so deeply sometimes it almost consumed him. 

     “ You’re payin’ me to have him shadowed, it’d be a bit suspicious if I weren’t thinking about him, wouldn’t it? “ The deflection came out smoothly, without a hint of that inner turmoil; only the flicker in his eyes betraying his thoughts. “ Why’d you ask? “