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xbittenx

@xbittenx / xbittenx.tumblr.com

Sun Tzu says 'The supreme excellence in war is to subdue your enemy without fighting".
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Oh

Well I guess this might be it, with the upcoming changes n’all... so I just want to say thanks.

Thanks to everyone who’s posts I’ve spent many happy hours (days... weeks...) scrolling through on my dash.

And thanks to everyone who liked what I posted myself.

It’s been great fun! And maybe we’ll bump into each other somewhere else.

L x

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I have a question...

Soooo... say I bought myself a 3D model of an evil genius science lab, who out of the Avengers would you most like to see play in it?

Multiples ok, fic recs to similar themed scenarios welcome...

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subtema

I saw a post saying that thor’s entrance to wakanda would’ve been better with immigrant song playing, and well….. my hand slipped

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There is a parallel universe where...

Bucky likes Deadpool’s wife

Captain America seduces Peter Quill’s ex

Everett Ross and Doctor Strange are best friends

Tony Stark has relationship with aunt May in Rome

Spider-man and Thor goes to sea hunting whales

Pepper is dating Hulk

Old Spider-man tries to be part of  the Avengers

Vulture is a superhero (None other than Batman)

And Natasha and Steve are happy together

Ultron & Tony used to play in an 80’s band together

Tony also used to hunt the Zodiac killer with Hulk

Ronan used to date Lois Lane

Fury was on a SWAT team with Bullseye

And Hawkeye and Falcon used to work bomb disposal together

Ego and Ultron used to be bros

Hulk used to date Electra

Clint used to be married to Janet

Falcon used to work with Aldrich Killian

Clint and Batman used to be blood brothers

Claire Temple used to date Bullseye

Clint and Bullseye used to be cop buddies

Pietro and Wanda have a kid

Clint and Wanda hunt killers in the Wyoming ice desert

and Gamora got engaged to Cassian Andor

Loki and Wanda were married and sang country music together

and Loki also hooked up with Ayesha

Meanwhile Fury, Rhomann Dey and Loki went looking for Kong…

… along with Carol Danvers

Stephen Strange and Loki fought together in WWI

Thor and Zemo raced cars

And Bucky did too

Bucky thought Jane was beautiful.

Steve, Gamora, and Heimdall were mercenaries

Loki and The Ancient One were married vampires

Skurge, Gamora and Steve Trevor locked up Stephen Strange on the U S S Enterprise.

Oh yeah… and Thor was Steve Trevor’s father…

Heimdall also had a skirmish with Steve Trevor whilst incognito…

And who can forget that one time Charles Xavier head-butted Stephen Strange…

Back then, Strange’s fighting technique was somewhat unrefined… Here he can be seen testing out his mad skills on a young Howard Stark

Who subsequently attempted to choke him…

There was also that one time when Jarvis interrupted Loki’s drunken shenanigans down the tavern…

And James Montgomery Falsworth was Jarvis’s brother-in-law…

Oh yeah, and that time when Loki wooed Doctor Who. With cake…

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fangirl13-14

Oh yeah and that time Deadpool was Fury’s bodygaurd 

Wanda has an affair with Poe Dameron

Even though she’s married to Draco Malfoy

Haymitch is Carol Danvers’ alcoholic dad

And Carol does arms deals with The Scarecrow.

There’s also that time that Wanda helped Thanos solve a mystery and had a fling with him too. (Good thing she didn’t get stuck with him until the end coz it turned out he was her dad.)

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reblogged

So, I was telling @egogrumps how much better this scene would be if they used britney spears Toxic in the back… and then my hand slipped.

everytime yall see this scene now your gonna think of this song your welcome

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xbittenx

OMFG!

I just love the internet sometimes :D

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reblogged

buzz aldrin looks like he’s about to tie trump to a rocket and launch him off into space

Do it, buzz

Now that’s a facial journey

Some of my favorites:

Its like hes going through the 5 stages of grief but he keeps flip flopping between bargaining and anger

2017 mood.

I think this one is my favourite

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skylorennn

I normally don’t reblog things like this but honestly this is one of a kind and buzz is fantastic

God bless

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wilwheaton

We are all Buzz Aldrin.

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Any Way You Want It

read it on the AO3 at http://ift.tt/2C0wORC

by LoonyLoopyLisa

He looked at Bucky’s target and whistled lowly. “I can see why they say you used to be the best shot in the world.”

Bucky’s eyes shot to Clint’s face at that remark. “What the hell do you mean ‘used to’? You’re talking to the Winter Soldier buddy, I am the best sniper in the world.”

Clint looked smug. “Not anymore pal. You’re talking to the actual best.”

***

Bucky and Clint try to compete for the title of Best Marksman in the World. It ends a little differently than they expected.

Words: 5039, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

read it on the AO3 at http://ift.tt/2C0wORC

My contribution to the Winterhawk Reverse Big Bang.  And for sure check out the art here!

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xbittenx

Yeay!!! Happy Winterhawk Day :D

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Winterhawk Mini Bang

Here it is folks all the works from the minibang! All the fics have art accompanying them. Take a look through these works and give the authors and artists some love. Please remember to check the archive warnings and be sure to read all the tags before you start reading.

Standby (T) Words: 2,387 by @mollynoble

Tags: AU - Modern Setting, Veteran Bucky, Veteran Clint, brief mention - anxitey
Clint and Bucky meet when they become trapped in an elevator. Clint is an idiot, but Bucky likes him anyways.
[Art] by @torii-storii

birdboy and grumpycat17 (T) Words: 2,020 by @varilia

Tags: Friends to Lovers, Interplanetary Travel, “The Space Between Us” AU
Clint was born on Mars. Only, like, two people on Earth know that, and his best– only– friend, James, is not one of them. When given the opportunity to visit Earth, and therefore James, Clint is eager to tell James the truth: about where he’s from, and the fluttery feelings that he gets whenever talking to James.
[Art] by @sian1359
Tags: road trips, americana, sexual content, developing relationships, getting together
Please tell me you are still alive, read Steve’s text. In Virginia, Bucky replied. The hell are you doing in Virginia? Would you believe me if I said trying to find a foam sculpture of Stonehenge? Tony said to make sure his car comes back in once piece. Please don’t shoot each other.
Clint and Bucky set off on an adventure to find an infamous work of Americana history, but find literally everything else (including love, and a Magic Fingers) instead.
[Art] by @bvckyboy

My Depths for You (M) Words: 7,287 by @shellsxo

Tags: Domestic Fluff; Domestic!Bucky; Domestic!Clint; Anniversary
Somewhere down the line, Bucky Barnes had become the sun, and Clint’s life had begun revolving around him. Neither had expected their feelings to become so strong, to grow in strength or in depth. But it had.

Lilac Alstroemeria Aster (T) Words: 7,303 by @jenjo93

Tags: No powers AU. Bucky works at a flower shop; Clint is a human disaster by day, vigilante by night
On the surface, Clint Barton shares nothing with Bucky Grant, the cute florist he helped save from thieves. Bucky has a business, owns more than one outfit, and looks to have a stable life. Worlds away from Clint’s drama-filled past. Bucky being kidnapped reminds Clint why he doesn’t put his heart on the line anymore.
[Art] by PlaidHunters

Edge of our Hope (T) Words: 5,956 by @punxbarton

Tags: Pacific Rim AU, mention of past character death, mention of past loss of limb
Nobody wonders whether Clint and Bucky are drift compatible. They clearly are. Which is the problem, since Clint already has a drift partner, and Bucky can’t ever pilot again. Well, it’s the problem for some people. Not for them. Never for them.
[Art] by @bizrreer
Tags: Canon-typical Violence, vague Mentions of suicidal thoughts, blood
Clint just wanted to get away. He didn’t want to hurt any one. But he keeps seeing blue…I dodged a bullet and I walked across a landmine / Oh, I’m still alive / Am I bleeding am I bleeding from the storm? / Just shine a light into the wreckage, so far away, away…‘Cause I’m still breathing / 'Cause I’m still breathing on my own / My head’s above the rain and roses / Making my way away / My way to you
[Art] by @theassassinhawk

Not Such a Risk (M) Words: 3,311 by @aw-hawkeye-no

Tags: Dom/Sub, Bondage, dom!Clint, sub!Steve, Sub!Bucky
“Buck, I gotta ask – are you here of your own free will, or did Clint kidnap you and force you to watch Dog Cops?” Steve smirked as he glanced from Bucky to Clint.“Hey!” Clint objected just as Bucky said, “Bit of column A, bit of column B.”Clint huffed indignantly. “As I remember it, I was minding my own business when you barged in here and started questioning my eating habits.”
Or, Clint has been acting as Steve’s and Bucky’s dom for weeks now, but the three of them have never done a scene together.
[Art](nsfw)by @xbittenx

Save Me. (T) Words: 4,867 by @hodginsismylife

Tags:  Not Captain America: The Winter Soldier Compliant, Swearing, Canon-Typical Violence.
Clint Barton just wanted an easy recovery after being braiwashed, he didn’t want to be kidnaped by HYDRA, he didn’t ask for any of this.
[Art] by @marvel-4-life
Bucky and Hagrid spend every Tuesday and Thursday morning at the Midnight Roast, studying and sampling Wade’s questionable baked goods. And maybe pining over Wade’s Other Favorite Cyborg. BTW, Wade totally ships it, guys.
[Art] by fitzz106

 The deals you  made (T) Words: 6,321 by @aijja

Tags: Canon-Typical Violence, Implied/Referenced Torture, AU-Canon Divergence, Fae & Mythical Beings
Bucky is ten when he meets a boy who helps him win a prize for Steve. There’s handshake to agree to a contract, due sometime in the future. They never meet again. Or at least, Bucky doesn’t remember it.
AKA. Don’t make deals with people who appear from thin air.
[Art] by @sian1359
Tags: Nightmares, PTSD, Recovering Memories
Bucky’s having trouble sleeping until Lucky decides to adopt him. Now Bucky isn’t sure if he’s sleeping better because of a dog or the archer that comes with the dog.
[Art] by @placna
Tags: Kidfic, Accidental baby acquisition, body dysphoria, deaf!Clint
When Clint brings home a baby and wants to keep her, Bucky must confront his  lingering body issues and whether or not he’s ready for the challenges of parenthood. 
[Art] by @fee-does-band-art

Empyrean (T) Words: 2,694 by @icantseemtomiss

Tags: Minor violence, mentions of past abuse. Alternate Universe- Greek,Mythology.
There’s plenty of things you get taught how to handle; like your pet hamster dying, or your girlfriend breaking up with you. But no-one ever teaches you how to handle the Greek god, Apollo, attaching himself to your soul.
[Art] by @pathulu
Tags: Canon-Typical Violence, mentions of brainwashing, getting together.
Years ago Clint and the Winter Soldier are given the same target and meet. Instead of eliminating the competition, the Soldier is intrigued by the disaster who beat him to the target. Through years of mind wipes disjointed images of blond and arrows keep coming back. When he breaks the mind control permanently, he wants to find Steve and the guy who kept sneaking around Hydra’s mind wipes.
[Art] by @mariana-oconnor
Tags: No Warnings, fluff, mutual healing, slow burn but it forgot to be slow
Clint’s life is a series of unfortunate events that somehow peaked at his apartment getting blown up. Bucky doesn’t really want to get caught up in his mess, but it’s hard to avoid the homeless guy sleeping on your couch when all you want to do is watch Netflix.
[Art] by @girlouttaplace

Springfield (T) Words: 1,779 by @precise-desolation

Tags: Slow build, Service dogs, PTSD
There was a man who walked  his dog every morning in the park where Clint went for his run.  Of course, Clint knew that was perfectly normal.  It was the dog’s service animal vest that caught his attention.  He had the guy figured for ex-military, he just hadn’t figured him for the Winter Soldier, the ghost sniper.  Or, well, former Winter Soldier.  It was a spur of the moment decision to buy the guy a coffee from the stand they both frequented.  He had wanted to ask about the dog.  He didn’t expect that it would become anything more.
[Art] by @mollynoble
Tags: Swearing, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Not Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie) Compliant
Clint agreed to an afternoon sparring session with Natasha. Little did he know that by the end of the day he’d be responsible for a former Hydra agent…and one of Steve Rogers oldest friends.
[Art] by @meesedraw
Tags: barton farm, clint and his strays
For once it’s not Clint who brings in another stray… and Clint is not amused when he finds out what kind of stray it is.
[Art] by @aw-hawkeye-no
Tags: Fluff, Angst, Get-Together, Anxiety, Lucky is the best dog,
He tells himself a lot of things. Things like he’s not a burden, things like he’s getting better, things like he’s awake in the middle of the night by choice, just because he enjoys prowling around the tower at night when it’s quiet. It’s the truth, if not the whole truth. What is also the truth is how much he enjoys finding Clint curled up on the living room floor next to a scruffy dog that Bucky knows doesn’t live in the tower with them.
[Art] by @placna
Tags:  Second-hand embarrassment
Clint makes a fool of himself over the comms during a mission, going into vivid detail of everything he feels for Barnes. Embarrassment makes him hide away, until Barnes forces him to come clean about everything.
[Art] by  PlaidHunters
Tags: Canon Divergence - Post-Avengers (2012), Clint Barton Feels, Everyone Has Issues, unhealthy platonic relationships, Trust Issues, Emotional Manipulation, Angst and Humor, BAMF Clint Barton, Mind Games. Mind Control, Yasha, STRIKE!Clint, Clint is actually fine, psychological evaluations are not for everyone
The Avengers think he’s traumatized, Fury thinks he needs a break, Natasha wants him to recover. Well, screw those guys. Clint is going to go and make some new friends that appreciate how badass and competent and not-messed-up-after-Loki he is. It goes great, until it doesn’t.
[Art] by @cratercreator
Clint Barton is acquitted after killing the Hulk.No, after killing Bruce Banner.After killing his friend.And Bucky could understand Barton’s next move and as the archer left the city and drove west in his disastrous Dodge Challenger, Bucky grabbed his backpack, hopped on his bike and followed him.He wasn’t going to stop Barton, he wasn’t going to catch him and bring him back…He was simply going with.
[Art] by @mollynoble
Twist on the film "He’s just not that into you”
[Art] by @bizrreer
Tags: sex, blow jobs, rimming, cute dog cops, star wars
“I stole your wallet because I was desperate for money a few years ago and I’ve finally gotten my life under control but the guilt hasn’t left me because you looked like a really sweet person so I went to the address on your driver’s license to return it and apologize but when you answered the door you took one look at me and shouted, “YOU!” and punched me in the face!“
[Art] by @fadesealcat
Tags: Oblivious Bucky, Slow Build Romance, Bucky Feels, Clint is a good boyfriend (even when Bucky doesn’t know he’s his boyfriend), Steve Rogers is a Good Bro, Fluff
To say that Bucky was surprised when Clint kissed him was an understatement. But it was nothing compared to the shock he felt when he learned they’d been dating for months without him realizing it. Clint gets whisked away for a mission before they have time to talk and Bucky is left to figure things out on his own - hindsight being 20/20 he can’t help but wonder how he missed things the first go around.
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Next one’s Thorki... then usual service will resume on SaS :)

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WinterHawk Mini-Bang Artist Sign Ups are still open!

Hey folks, we are almost there but we still do need some more artists. If you are able and interested please consider signing up, if you’re not that is fine, however I would appreciate it if you would help spread the word.

Artists can submit illustrations, comics, moodboards, photo manips, gif sets or fan videos. If you have any questions here are the FAQ and Dates. My ask is always open or email me at winterhawkbigbang@gmail.com
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Mini-bang Artist Sign Up

  • The list of stories will be posted February 16th for Artists to pick from
  • Final art due March 5th
  • Artists can submit illustrations, comics, moodboards, photo manips, gif sets or fan videos
  • There is more information on the FAQ page and on the Dates page
  • If you have any questions the ask is always open or email me at winterhawkbigbang@gmail.com
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mollynoble

Hey guys, we need more artists! If you are an artist please consider signing up, if you’re not please at least signal boost this:) Thanks

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To all my followers (or at least, the few of you that aren’t porn-bots lol)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

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