Seriously if anybody ever takes any mental-health advice from me, let it be this:

Do not self deprecate. Ever. Not as humor, not as a coping mechanism, and certainly not as an attempt to endear yourself to other.

It is SO unhealthy and SO debilitating to your mental health. Good lord, I cannot stress enough how much self-deprecation fucking hurts you. Please just stop doing this to yourself. It’s a form of self-harm, it’s not good for you.

I’ve met so many people who would be so much better off if they just stopped trash-talking themselves so much.

The myth of Achilles, but instead of holding him by the heel, Thetis sumberges him fully so that Achilles is completely invulnerable and Thetis has one invulnerable hand.

She only needs one oven mitt when taking cookies out of the oven.

But there would still be two small parts of him that are vulnerable because they were covered by her fingertips at the time, stopping the water from touching them. Which means those fingertips are also vulnerable on her hand 

Achilles *putting those little round band-aids on two parts of his ankle before battle*

Thetis *knitting fingertip oven mitts for her thumb and forefinger*

This is a Greek comedy I could get behind 

What if she put him in a sack and dunked him in? The water would saturate the sack and soak him and so long as she pulled him out quick, he wouldn't drown. Then they'd have a sack that's invulnerable too and can be used as the most unexpected shield ever.

Imagine Achilles storming Troy with one (1) invulnerable sack for a shield

thetis just sticks him in one of these bad boys

and swirls him around like a batch of chicken nuggets until he’s invulnerable all over. 

Tag yourself I’m the “Overdressed and Underappreciated”. Artist : http://www.mattadrian.com/ 

If you thought “hm those styles of art AND speech seem very familiar,” you are right because it is the same person that did these

Oh my god damn

Things still left to do in SU now that we’re all asking “Where do we go from here?”

Emerald is probably still hunting down Lars and the Off-Colors

Some closure on that whole Jasper and Lapis thing now that Lapis is a full time Crystal Gem and Jasper is back

Rescuing the Zoomans and reintegrating them back to Earth

The hundreds of actual Rose Quartz gems bubbled up on the Zoo are still there and could probably be set free now

We still don’t know what Rose/Pink was keeping in the chest in Lion’s mane

The fate of Blue Zircon, Lemon Jade, and the Topaz fusion were left up in the air

Homeworld is still facing a resource crisis and is literally split in half and hanging on by threads

And Lars is effectively immortal and he’ll totally outlive everyone

I feel like this next season will be more like a giant epilogue and doing cleanup on everything that’s been left open, unless we get a timeskip like what everyone is counting on

I just had this hyper-realistic dream and like. I don’t even know what to make of this lmao 

I was sitting in this park, on a bench, looking up at the night sky and all the stars and stuff, and I blinked and suddenly the entire sky was different. I’m talking different constellations, the sky absolutely packed with billions more stars, some so close they’re massive. I’m like wtf and suddenly I realise there’s an old man sitting next to me, dressed in like 1940s clothing, also looking up at the sky.

before I can ask him if he’s you know, noticed, he speaks, without looking away from the sky.

“this is what the universe really looks like,” he tells me.

“oh,” I say. a pause. “…can you put it back?”

he smiles and nods. I look up. the sky has gone back to normal.

“what do I do with this information?” I ask, looking at him again.

he turns his head and, smiling, looks me dead in the face. "be careful.“

listen i had to draw it

I love this.

This is beautiful.

This is such a writing prompt but also I’m pretty sure you oughta be careful, Op.

look. look at this beautiful sword meme. i’m going to cry

@petermorwood

I saw and reblogged this one a while back, but it’s always worth repeating, and this time I’m adding a bit of background info comparing common fantasy sword features to the Real Thing (with pictures, of course.)

Leaf-bladed swords are a very popular fantasy style and were real, though unlike modern hand-and-a-half longsword versions, the real things were mostly if not always shortswords.

Here are Celtic bronze swords…

…Ancient Greek Xiphoi…

… and a Roman “Mainz-pattern” gladius…

Saw or downright jagged edges, either full-length or as small sections (often where they serve no discernible purpose) are a frequent part of fantasy blades, especially at the more, er, imaginatively unrestrained end of the market.

Real swords also had saw edges, such as these two 19th century shortswords, but not to make them cool or interesting. They’re weapons if necessary…

…but since they were carried by Pioneer Corps who needed them for cutting branches and other construction-type tasks, their principal use was as brush cutters and saws.

This dussack (cutlass) in the Wallace Collection is also a fighting weapon, like the one beside it…

…but may also have had the secondary function of being a saw.

A couple of internet captions say it’s for “cutting ropes” which makes sense - heavy ropes and hawsers on board a ship were so soaked with tar that they were often more like lengths of wood, and a Hollywood-style slice from the Hero’s rapier (!!) wouldn’t be anything like enough to sever them. However swords like this are extremely rare, which suggests they didn’t work as well as intended for any purpose.

I photographed these in Basel, Switzerland, about 20 years ago. Look at the one on the bottom (I prefer the basket-hilt schiavona in the middle).

A lot of “flamberge” (wavy-edge) swords actually started out with conventional blades which then had the edges ground to shape - the dussack, that Basel broadsword and this Zweihander were all made that way.

The giveaway is the centreline: if it’s straight, the entire blade probably started out straight.

Increased use of water power for bellows, hammers and of course grinders made shaping blades easier than when it had to be done by hand. This flamberge Zweihander, however, was forged that way.

Again, the clue is the centre-line.

Incidentally those Parierhaken (parrying hooks - a secondary crossguard) are among the only real-life examples of another common fantasy feature - hooks and spikes sticking out from the blade.

Here are some rapiers and a couple of daggers showing the same difference between forged to shape and ground to shape. The top and bottom rapiers in the first picture started as straights, and only the middle rapier came from the forge with a flamberge blade.

There’s no doubt about this one either.

The reason - though that was a part of it - wasn’t just to look cool and show off what the owner could afford (any and all extra or unusual work added to the price) but may actually have had a function: a parry would have been juddery and unsettling for someone not used to it, and any advantage is worth having.

However, like the saw-edged dussack, flamberge blades are unusual - which suggests the advantage wasn’t that much of an advantage after all.

Here’s a Circassian kindjal, forged wiggly…

…and an Italian parrying dagger forged straight then ground wiggly…

There were also parrying daggers with another fantasy-blade feature, deep notches and serrations which in fantasy versions often resemble fangs or thorns.

These more practical historical versions are usually called “sword-breakers” but I prefer “sword-catcher”, since a steel blade isn’t that easy to break. Taking the opponent’s blade out of play for just long enough to nail him works fine.

NB - the curvature on the top one in this next image is AFAIK because of the book-page it was copied from, not the blade itself.

The missing tooth on that second dagger, and the crack halfway down this next one’s blade, shows what happens when design features cause weak spots.

So there you go: a quick overview of fantasy sword features in real life.

Here’s a real-life weapon that looks like it belongs in a fantasy story or film - and this doesn’t even have an odd-shaped blade…

Just a very flexible one…

If you want more odd blades, Moghul India is a good place to start…

i could not ask for a better addition to my meme post than blade education thank you so much

Well now I can correctly moonwalk away from uncomfortable situations

Because everyone deserves to know how to do a mean moonwalk.

guYS THIS IS IMPORTANT

I definitely reblogged this sitting down not getting up to do the moonwalk at all

If you can’t reblog this, unfollow me now.

Team Avatar x Pokemon

Yep. That’s fair.

best thing i learned today: “The Loud American” role in Japanese businesses

nobody asked but imma explain anyway

no idea how it came up, but my programming prof was talking about his friend who works for Nintendo Japan who’s secondary role is The Loud American, and my prof explained what that was and how it came about

see, in Japan you do not talk back to your boss. you just don’t, even if they have stupid ideas and want the company to act on them. Like Nissan did sometime back. But since the other employees couldn’t do anything about this terrible idea that would ruin the company, they called in an American who had no reservations about telling the boss that their stupid idea was a stupid idea

and that’s just become a role in Japanese businesses, where they keep an American on staff who plays up the American stereotype and tells the boss what the Japanese employees can’t or won’t out of societal norms

dream job.

How much do they pay per hour for me to sit around and every so often storm into the bosses office and call his ideas stupid as fuck?

modern day court jester

i saw hewwo in voice chat because

it either instantly aggros all allies or i get a returning chorus of “HEWWO??? AWE YOU THEWE?” from all cursed friends who are immune to the aggro effects of hewwo

either way it gets everyone’s attention immediately

“Hewwo?” Cantrip. Instant. Verbal component. Duration one minute, no concentration. Upon casting, everyone in hearing range rolls a will save. On a failed save they immediately become hostile to the caster. Anyone else with this cantrip does not need to make the save and can also cast Hewwo as a free action on everyone previously affected. Instead of repeating the will save, each person affected by the original Hewwo immediately gets advantage on melee attacks and strength checks, and disadvantage on concentration, ranged attacks, charisma checks, and dexterity checks for the duration. 

hey..

bye

Alright, everyone, time to log off. We’ve reached the peak.

Wish i was drunk at a party explaining mgs to someone

no go on

20 year old beginner: one year of learning flute and butterfly knife skillz :)

Fun fact: Adults actually learn those “You need to practice!” skills better than children do. 

Kids tend to want to do literally anything aside from learning this skill my parent is forcing me to learn. 

Adults actually can sit down and practice things for hours on end. Adults WANT to practice to get their skills better. Adults deliberately set aside time every day to practice. Even if it’s just 20 minutes, it’s productive growth and not wiggling in your chair mournfully watching birds out the window. 

Anything from Drawing to Weaving to Violin to fuckin flipping bufferfly knives like a pro - choose a skill and LEARN, dammit! None of that ‘Children’s brains are more malleable’ bullshit. Brain squish is not the end-all of learning! 

This is how you become a bard

comfy

FISH NO

..but comfy

FISH PLEASE YOU COULD GET HURT

s

sleeby….

Put those fucking sticks down

its so fucking galaxy brain how this guy is pretending that women’s sexual liberation is imagining a cartoon dog from a kids game is sexually active. literally just say you are horny for an anthropomorphic shih tzu and go

choose your fighter