listen up, fives

Official Post of Massachusetts

man with excellent self restraint dismayed to realize that not wanting anything is more likely a depression symptom than a carefully honed skill that atones for other aspects of his character

anyone else letting the days go by and letting the water hold them down or is it just me and that dude in the big suit

"it gets easier with time" have you ever considered I want it to be easy now?

real

today @rubyfalls and I are at one of those ritzy spas in the Berkshires for Treat Yo Self Amidst The Horrors 2023 and immediately upon exiting her 9 am Meditation For Sleep class Liz hissed “what the hell kind of white people shit did you bring me to?” the kind where they have Sodastream kiosks with 7 flavors, bebe!

what should we do next time? (With something like 200K tweets/girlblogs between us we could probably teach the journaling class ourselves, although perhaps not in the $500-per-hour way they expected)

I do not need "past life regression," I just need to pay money for something on this list and my actual grandmother will show up to haunt me

My beloved @lemonistas has been the recipient of a stream of text messages that have been increasingly insane due to life reasons and she gently suggested I calm the fuck down at a day spa, so off we went into the Berkshires, where hundreds of disappointing daughters before us had been shipped off due to their nerves, and well. It was an experience! Some man pulled me around like a piece of taffy and every time I would relax he would move and I would tense up again and my arm still hurts and I did a Meditation about sleep where the man talked the whole time (seems counterproductive) and we spent time in the spa for gossip reasons. The whole day was good research for my Idea that I’m gonna get to soon, I swear. Also I would be so good at being rich, holy fuck! They had a class where you could pay to do farm chores and I did NOT fall for that scheme but I did my best to take a Himalayan bowl session seriously and I 75% succeeded. So all in all, a good day.

BILLY CRYSTAL AND MEG RYAN AS HARRY AND SALLY WHEN HARRY MET SALLY (1989) Dir. Rob Riener

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Vulture.com (x)

what are you wearing to the Job Lot Met Gala? the rule is that your outfit must be inspired by or sourced from this week’s circular. The Guster kayak is already taken by @rubyfalls​ and I am going to go as Scrub Mommy (pictured)

cc @akamuffintop​

Not pictured: my bedazzled Guster Is For Lovers sticker on my Guster kayak

Also the Guster kayak is a Crazy Deal (tm) this week so truly, ocean state job lot is the place to be

I think the last time I cried at a series finale was the Hogcock!/Last Lunch doubleheader (shove it) but there’s something about knowing how this has to end which makes me feel like I’m going to have An Emotional Reaction at some point

“You think things will go on forever, and then they don’t.” 😭

Peter Jakes came back to Oxford to serve cunt and smoke cigarettes and he smoked all the cigarettes already

good news: we reached “stick your head in the freezer to calm down” levels of crying throughout the last 20 minutes. Love this for me.

get you a friend like tumblr user @rubyfalls, the Grizz to my Dot Com:

Hello from elon’s mid-life mistake, just a reminder that I am still the way I am and while I am dormant here I am ready and willing to jump in and argue about stuff from years ago at a moments notice