he chooses bucky

Everything I did, I did for the Rebellion.

Bucky recolour 1/?

Something a little bit nicer for Bucky’s birthday!  🎉🎂

I wanna sleep next to you But that’s all I wanna do right now And I wanna come home to you But home is just a room full of my safest sounds Cause you know that I can’t trust myself with my 3AM shadow I’d rather fuel a fantasy than deal with this alone

make me choose: mishacolins asked: the shire or rohan?

awake or alive

her name is Daisypuff and she only bites sometimes

Bucky learns the term “bait dog” and wants to put someone through a wall.

“I’m so sorry,” the shelter owner says, and it really looks like she is, “but legally we can’t adopt her out, she bit someone.”

“What’ll happen to her?” Bucky asks, even though he knows.

“We have to put her down.”

She doesn’t try to downplay her words. They’re stated matter-of-fact. But Bucky sees that it still hurts her to say it.

“You can’t just… deal a dog under the table?”

Bucky’s joking, but not. She laughs, but not.

“I’d lose my job. And there are a lot of other dogs here that need me.”

Daisypuff looks at them through the chainlink gate.

“Can you imagine,” the shelter owner says, “how crazy it would be if someone broke into a shelter to steal a dog?”

“Totally crazy,” Bucky agrees.

HOLY FUCK. HOLY FUCK. HOLY FUCK. HOLY F

they’re studying so hard

skinny steve on a skinny couch

one of my fav tropes

cute fluffly domestic doodles i’ve been working on lately. maybe i’ll color them, maybe not.

JUST NOTICED LAST NIGHT THAT BUCKY WAS ALSO ON A DRIP IN THE ENTIRE CHAIR SCENE

I know it’s a fucked up scene, I do, but that to me just is nOPE. What the fuck are they putting into his system on top of the mind wiping and the physical abuse and the conditioning. 

wait, what?

THE TUBE ON THE BACK OF HIS RIGHT HAND, IS THAT A DRIP?

Dr. Cyan calling in here, and yes, that is absolutely a peripheral IV cannula on his right hand. Watching the scene carefully you can see the IV stand on his right, with two infusion bags attached (sorry for the crappy images, maybe someone can grab a better screenshot if they have the DVD):

If you watch frame by frame, you can see that Bucky pops the connection tube off when he attacks the med tech; it dangles freely from the IV bag when the guards move to point their guns at him. In real life he’d probably have torn the cannula out of his hand entirely; it happens all the time with little old ladies in my ER so I was disappointed the directors didn’t draw on that particular body horror/’ouch’-factor here.

The infusion bags appear to be one 1,000 mL isotonic saline or D5W/D5NS (dextrose/glucose in a saline solution) for tissue rehydration, and one 500 mL isotonic saline, most likely a diluent for injectable/parenteral drug administration:

Which drug? Well, it could be any HYDRA concoction, but I’d put my money on the tried-and-true fallback of some benzodiazepine. BZDs/derivatives are anxiolytic (anxiety-reducing), hypnotic (sedative/sleep-inducing), anticonvulsant (good for when you’re electrocuting someone’s brain), amnestic (affecting memory), and myorelaxant (muscle-relaxing), a nice cocktail for working with the Winter Soldier - and hey! paradoxical BZD reactions include aggression and violence (such as attacking attending medical staff), and it may also cause anterograde amnesia as well as internalised feelings of turmoil, anxiety, depression, and loss of the ability to experience and/or express feelings. Plus, withdrawal can cause depression, depersonalisation, derealisation, hypersensitivity, psychosis, and suicidal ideation - sounds like a lot of Bucky-in-from-the-cold fanfics, am I right?

Seriously, writing this, I’m wondering where the withdrawal!Bucky fanfics are - the fics I’ve read all focus on his mental issues, but what about the physiological ones? I’d really like to read a fic about Bucky coming off whatever HYDRA pumped him full of - now that’d make for some neat hurt/comfort (and a lot of curling up on Steve’s bathroom floor shaking and puking his guts out).

(When I get my hands on a HD copy of the movie I’ll have a look at the rest of the medical setup in that scene. I’m especially interested in the screens behind the chair - maybe some more medical meta to be explored? Please send any screenshots my way if you have them!)

tony~~

winter soldier