Sometimes I randomly remember that Kaz is the only member of the Crows who only speaks one language and for no apparent reason I find that endlessly amusing.

Like, the comedic potential here? Nina and Inej girl talking but as soon as he walks in the room they switch to Ravkan?? Wylan and Nina chatting in Kerch but then switching to Fjerdan when Matthias walks in and suddenly Kaz has completely lost track of the conversation?? Jesper saying something to Kaz in Zemeni that makes Nina howl with laughter, but neither of them will tell him what it was??? It’s so funny to me.

He would also absolutely start learning another language out of sheer spite if they did this, but I think it would be hilarious if he chose Kaelish and tried to use it with Jesper and Jesper would just be like “… I don’t speak Kaelish. I just know a little bit… I can sing in Kaelish, if you want?” and Kaz is so disappointed by this but he can’t show it so he just starts yelling at Nina in Kaelish instead. She corrects his pronunciation and he nearly murders her.

Everyone’s having fun.

witcher tarot

bill after meeting frank:

oh to be a pup being painted - by William Henry Hamilton Trood (1848-1899). 

You know he watched this happen and laughed his ass off and went, “people need to see this.”

the first rule of fandom should be “don’t be creepy and weird to the actors.” why is this concept so hard for people to understand

nothing more, nothing less

Kaz Brekker was acquainted with different monsters. Those wrapped in expensive silk and bathed in sickening perfume. Those who spouted beautiful lies, enticing unwitting men into their dens. Those with hands stained crimson, preying on children and fools alike. His reflection on a mirror.

But the green-eyed beast proved to be a terrifying match.

Or, Kaz gets jealous.

"Brekker."

"Darling," KAZ drawled without looking up at your arrival, his tone more mocking than affectionate. "You're two bells late. Do you have the—"

A roll of parchment zipped through the air, landing in the middle of his desk with startling accuracy and ruining the neatly arranged blueprints spread atop it.

"I told you to quit calling me that," you muttered darkly. "One of these days, I'll really cut off your tongue."

GREEK GODS AS ANIMATED TEXTS :D

low effort Olympian memes :)

ZEUS

POSEIDON

HADES

HERA

DEMETER

HESTIA

APOLLO

ARTEMIS

ATHENA

HEPHAESTUS

ARES

APHRODITE

DIONYSUS

HERMES

THEFT

How DARE you leave this in the notes

Adam Frankenstein's debut novel about an unhinged goth queen who fucks in graveyards and keeps her love's calcified heart

Everyone shut up and look at Lala.

i love you being trans i love you trans women i love you self discovery

Grishaverse as things my friends have said

*loud crashes and bangs* that was nothing- Jesper

you like that smell? it’s called victory- Kaz

Amen more like ahhhh men and ahhhh women- Nina 

My family’s pretty sick but just like in the head- Darkling

I SHOULD’VE TRUSTED GOOGLE- Jesper

(offended) I know what kind of tree I am- Matthias

I wonder if my sneeze would be low pitched. Achooo- Wylan

Maybe you’re a hologram *Wacks Kaz* Nope you’re not a hologram- Jesper

*sad* You have another fluffy cow dealer?- Alina to Genya

It makes you a less organised sack of blood- Kaz (discussing ebola)

One of my sims has a crush on me and that would be cheating on my 2 wives, girlfriend and boyfriend- Nina

I can lose my innocence but I can not lose my virginity- Alina

I thought it was contemporary and then this bitch started talking about werewolves- Darkling

I’m too blind for murder wink- Kaz

Are you high on sleep deprivation?- Zoya (to Nikolai)

What are they talking about? Probably straight things- Nina & Jesper

Being competitive. AKA being a sore loser- Nikolai

I’m allowed to have a knife in my bag, I’m an art student - Wylan

I’m going to call it just a board instead of a whiteboard because we’re not racist here - Jesper

It doesn’t matter if I’m lesbian, I’m a catch - Genya

Gandalf, I am your father- Wylan

There’s always room in a lady’s stomach - Zoya

*talking about children* how do you contain your desire to just clock them (with actions) - Kaz

If I get shat on by a seagull I’m suing the city of Sydney - Nina

Friends?? Pfft no; more like free labour - Kaz

*whispers quietly* big words…. - Mal

I have the vocal range of a prawn - Zoya

Inej: Violence is never an answer

Kaz: Violence is always a considered answer but barely ever the chosen answer

happy valentines day you lonely lonely lonely single bastard- Zoya (to Nikolai)

Nina is too scared to watch horror movies but she is doing it for the gays - Inej

I’m not judgy, I’m just angry - Kaz

I just spent a long time projecting gay energy on purpose - Nina

You think I’m a murderer and cool; I love this game - Wylan

I have been stuck in this same kangaroo land for 15 years!!! - Jesper

*aggressively types* - Baghra

I’m getting blessed tonight, RIP that sinning ayyyyyyy - Nina

I walked into school and they told me i was moldy and am going to hell cause i am a ‘bad fruit of the spirit”… i was in year 1 - Nikolai

I don’t have enough hands to throw hands - Adrik

Bibbity bobbity bitch - Zoya

There was this guy who had a crocodile permit and he had a crocodile and then he got busted for drugs or something - Wylan

What’s sexy about writing, well Ernest Hemingway… - Mr Fahey

Nina: fuck Jesus

Matthias: no don’t fuck Jesus

Nina: ah yes fuck Mary 

Inej: no don’t fuck Mary that defeats the entire point of Christianity

Nina: fuck virginity

*quietly* who has a knife kink? (it’s Kaz, obviously)- Jesper

Find another rebound red head - Alina

Somehow I end up adopting all the isolated gays - Kaz

You’re pretty to look at but I don’t want your penis inside of me - Nina

There are always endless options… in this world… like- u could be a dinosaur if u wanted. just kidding I wish u could- Alina

18 is a great age to fuck some French men………or women - Nina

Not even Sesame Street level of literacy here - Wylan’s dad

I was going to assume thats just pirate-core - Nikolai

I would be concerned if a lesbian on birth control got pregnant - Genya

It’s a great day to like women - Nina

We have to keep the babies room temperature- Inej

Mal: I don’t take insults from a potatoe

Nikolai: You spelt potato wrong

You’re like a Kmart model but not top of the range- Zoya

Sorry mum, I am too punk rock to pick up the groceries- Wylan

You have 24 carrot gold leg hair- Zoya to Genya

Cannibalism? Only if it is kosher.- Nikolai

I have so much banana I’m gonna be high on potassium bitches- Jesper

Kaz, you sleep deprived bean, go and sleep- Inej

I would google it but it’ll probably just tell me I have arm pit cancer- Genya

I have a very important question… about mens nipples - Jesper

*reads out bit of really quite gay writing* aNyWaY FrIeNdShIp vIbEs - Nina

Can we not talk about Smurf reproduction please - Matthias 

She looks like she’s had a boob job. And trust me, I know, I like boobs- Nina

Jesper *yelling*: NINA SHES GOING ON A DATE

Inej: Jesper be quiet!!

Jesper *whisper shouting*: NiNa sHeS gOiNg On A dAtE

I need the warmth of your supple calf - Nina

Jesper: You know who’s hot… Scar from the lion king

Kaz: He’s a lion?!??

Wylan: A hOt lion.. 

*Alina stomping down the hall tired and lowkey grumpy, not wearing her glasses* Genya why do u look weird? Wait- glasses. *stomps back up hall*

Inej: Kaz r u taking Latin??

Jesper: I speak pig Latin 

If your fingers are feeling kinda slimy, just wash them……its just…… dissolving your fingers (calm as ever) - Wylan

I used to be a VIG. Do u know what that means? A Very Important Greek (Grisha).- Zoya

Im not a whore, im tastefully slutty - Genya

*spends 5 minutes fannina-ing over a guy named Herby*- Nina

Do you really want to be worth the most though? Cause if youre worthless they wont sell you- Kaz