anyway, imagine thinking dean doesn't reciprocate cas's love when literally the entire episode was set up out of characters (charlie and sam) losing their significant others and then dean just. loses cas.

wear a different perfume when you commit murder fuckin amateurs 

also wear shoes that aren’t your actual size and use gloves if you have to touch anything

what the hell is this here? A how-to-commit-the-perfect-crime??

Wear a wig. Contact lenses . Change your accent . Change Hand when writing . Layer up to make you look big if your small n vice versa . Contour the hell outta your face.

Get your car interior thoroughly washed, then purposely dirty it up again.

Also use an icicle for the weapon because it melts away Buy a ticket to a show and tell as many people / post it on social media that u went to the show

Y'all suspect af😂

*adds 363,462 more people to list of that I will fuck never with*

Make sure you set up a solid alibi Pay for everything in cash

Or, for those of you who’ve read Roald Dahl’s Lamb to the Slaughter, feed the murder weapon to the police

Bodies should be buried vertically, not horizontally, to avoid the appearance of a grave. If you choose to dismember the body instead of bury it whole don’t forget to take a lighter or bottle of lye to the fingertips until charred or melted away, and use bleach on every surface that may have come in contact with blood splatter.

Also, don’t fucking brag about it later Jesus wept.

all this info is good for writing

but for actual real life, no one on tumblr has enough energy to get out of bed

ain’t no body on this website is gonna murder anyone

Make friends with a pig farmer. A full grown nursing sow can eat an entire human body, bones and all, in about 6 hours.

Shit that last one is more helpful than I wanted it to be, I’ll never look at pigs the same

Reblogging for *educational* purposes :)

This post is legendary and I’m so glad I found it. I love all the advice. Except the icicle. That’s technically impossible. Use a disposable knife instead and break the handle.

use a glass knife with wooden handle for ultimate wounding. its gonna leave a severe fucking wound and u can burn the wood and melt down the glass if it doesnt shatter inside the victim.

Thomas what did i tell you about making suspiious posts?

I love learning.

IT’S ON MY DASH I REPEAT IT’S ON MY DASH.

ON MY DASH

Also bury the body deeper than six feet, so it can’t be washed up or smelled by hounds. Yes, that may mean you dig a 12 foot deep grave. Guess what? Murder is work.

Murder is work kids.

Too much work

Creating new jobs in America one murder at a time

Also work fast and no witnesses

THIS HAS OVER A MILLION NOTES WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL!!!!!

Also if you are planning to flee the country, get that figured out way in advance. At least a year or two in advance. And make sure everyone knows you’re moving, so it’s less suspicious than to randomly leave without saying anything. Perhaps it’s studying abroad, a job opportunity, or even meeting up with a friend and/or romantic partner?

If you buey the body vertically don’t forget to leave a few feet above the head and place some animal bones on it so when the blood hounds sniff they will find the animal bones and the police would likely rule it as a false positive. Also globally the solving rate for murder is 45% so don’t worry too much

am I gonna get in some fbi list for rebbloging this? possible

do I care enough to not reblog this? absolutely not

Don’t forget it’s just a missing person case if they can’t find the body.

Alligators will eat a body A LOT faster than pigs. Just saying.

Being able to make homemade acid is a plus too. Turns the body, bones and all into goo that will be absorbed into the dirt. If you live in the country spread into a farmers field way in the middle. Corn will grow wonderfully and they think it’s where extra plant food came out of the tractor. Owning a hearse helps… People just think you are weird for owning one. You can drive around with a body inside no one bats an eye

I love every single person who contributed to this post… also thank you.

this entire post is literal gold

Looks like the probs is going

the FBI man behind my camera: oh

Sam and Dean at Au them:

Jack: I ate it.

Dean: No! Spit it out!

Me: now this is how you treat a three year old

I think Jack and I share the same braincell because as soon as cas read the translation I yelled EAT IT

jensen can’t stop himself from looking at his wife like she’s the only girl in the world

AU!Sam and Dean: We have our own plane

Dean: Ya'll are getting paid?

Sam and Dean bringing up Jack possibly becoming God and then Jack walking in blowing bubblegum is the funniest fucking thing Supernatural has ever done

I need an explanation as to why these chose these three things in the intro recap:

1) Castiel watching the pizza man porno

2) The scene they chose for Meg was where Castiel shoves her against the wall and kisses her, claiming he learned it from the pizza man

3) Dean in multiple shots eating pizza

I NEED ANSWERS

I’ve been waiting 15 years for Sam to say that and in such a queer way. (via jupiterjames)

i truly cannot imagine what my life or personality would be like if i didn’t have the fangirl gene. like, when i meet people irl who have a lot of varied interests but don’t seem to be interested in attaching intensely to any one thing, i am baffled and tbh a little horrified. i don’t know how to engage! i can’t imagine your inner life!! like is there really nothing you love so ardently that just thinking about it makes you lose your goddamn MIND with happiness? what makes you light up inside? what gets your heart pounding out of your chest with crazy joy?? where do you get your ENDORPHINS???

even sam isn’t safe from his own sass

Billie, aka Death

That’s metal as fuck. 

(via nerdygeekyscience)

So like is Chuck in the process of cancelling our earth rn with Coronavirus

Ok so I just have one question about 5x12...

If Chuck destroyed all the worlds...

And French Mistake made our world canon in the Supernatural universe...

Did we all just get killed off?

‪Jack may have learned Winchester stupid but he’s also learned Winchester devious extortion and I am here for it. ‬

nothing to see here besides a group of confused boys and a teal Baby?