banned from the clock app for making too many alarms. you set too many alarms girl! banned from clock app.

thing that happened to famous singer-songwriter andrew hozier-byrne

This is Shakespearian.

I never want to see another post about environmental storytelling.

but soft what ball through yonder concrete breaks

The Catholic Church spent $3 million trying to crush abortion rights in Kansas, and failed

If the church can spend 3 million dollars to influence the government, they need to be taxed.

from now on your tumblr nickname is whatever you get from this sexual identity generator  ☆

No offense these are the funniest fucking tags

things that made me stop wanting to die that require no effort whatsoever

Almost all of these are about variety. Humans need stimulation! We need enrichment! We literally cannot do the same thing every day!

The other day I was feeling miserable, so I hopped on a bus and rode it all the way back to where I’d started, and my brain, which had finally had some proper stimulation via new environments, was suddenly ready to go again!

This is why taking walks/drives and trying new hobbies are good for you! Don’t turn yourself into a sad zoo animal! You need some pumpkins to roll around in your enclosure!

ITS BACK!!!!!

god i fucking love the quote “dont turn yourself into a sad zoo animal” it has really inspired me!

Try a different hot drink in the morning!

Text someone you haven’t in a while!

Wear a fancy outfit while you have dinner!

Watch and episode of a show you used to love!!

I can’t reblog with vids so have a play by play

That “I think I fucked up” was timed perfectly

dealing with the worst case scenario

I feel like this could be useful in my future

REBLOG THIS. I CANNOT STRESS HOW IMPORTANT THIS GUIDES ARE, BOOST THIS SHIT

I think if a fairy showed up at my house like yeah they are not real but there is narrative precedent for that. a fairy, if it existed, would show up at a house. i just need to suspend one disbelief everything else tracks. it's a big surprise, but a singular one. i would know how to get with the programm pretty quick.

if a walrus knocked at my door there would be many more fucking questions than one. a walrus showing up at my house? knowing that knocking is the required social etiquette? having reasons to know on my door and somehow the ability to do that despite having no arms? said walrus coming to me of all people?? a walrus being real is the least of my concerns at that point why the fuck does it need my help what kind of problem can I solve that a socially aware and apparently findextrous walrus fucking can't

Certain words can change your brain forever and ever so you do have to be very careful about it.

It should 100% be illegal for companies to make you give them your payment information when you sign up for a free trial version of their product. It is not necessary and there is no good fucking reason for them to do it. It’s blatantly just so they can steal forgetful customers’ money.

oh hey, thanks for reminding me to cancel a free trial i had going on.

Reblog to save an unnecessary charge cause it also reminded me to cancel a trial lol

Every cat I have known would immediately climb up through the hole and start stealing everybody’s food.

Crime porthole

this was designed by cats

Just get one of these and put them over the whole, you can have cat and food protection.

You imprison miette. You put her under the glass like the cheese. Jail for mother for hundreds of years.

this is the most deadpan miette I've ever heard omg

that’s because miette’s had enough

oh my god his face is like :D

[x]

i used to be so good at writing strong, thoroughly-researched, thoroughly-edited essays.

as a kid in hs, my teacher literally came up to me, holding my 40 page essay on the intersection of the European witch hunts and capitalism/exploitation/gender roles (it was supposed to be 7 pages...whoops) and went like "this is literally a master's-degree level thesis. what are you doing?? you could literally use this as your final dissertation in a master's program, what the fuck."

NOW??? NOW?? you'd think I'd be oh so skilled. but alas. i can barely piece together two ideas. adhd skill-regression is so so real. im SOBBING

The skill can come back and it often does. It is not unusual for it skill recedes during stressful and painful times. Maybe you just need more stability/safety/kind people around you.

I have been through something similar a few times in my life with writing, yoga, studying...

Admittedly, my life is always financially and socially precarious, so my notion of stability currently just means "enough money to pay the rent and food for the next few months."

It is hard to hold onto anything when you have to fight for survival all the time, either materially or emotionally.

Wow, uh. Okay, I'm gonna need a minute to process "It is hard to hold onto anything when you have to fight for survival all the time...". You're genuinely rewiring my brain is we speak.

Thank you, this means a lot to hear. <3

Thank you as well. We have to help each other in this hellscape whenever we can.