actual list of doctors in one piece:

Pigeon wings under a UV light

"The secret invisible light we cannot directly perceive creates beautiful vaguely rune-like shaped on the religiously significant appendages of an otherwise mundane animal" yeah get out of here, tone down the fantasy vibes a little bit, that's too much. Oh wait that's reality? ... Well then.

im not familiar with that movie but ive heard of its homosexuality

Leonid Pasternak  (Ukrainian, 1862–1945) - The Torments of Creative Work

oh leonid, we're really in it now

Good morning. This is the best fic comment I have ever received.

It's actually crazy talking to friends and relatives about what's going on because very few of them know that this is a retaliatory attack. I keep seeing people online call the attack unprovoked too.

So those who don't know, on April 1st Israeli warplanes bombed Iran's consulate in Damascus. The attack killed 7 of Iran’s military advisers including 3 senior commanders.

This attack on the embassy is against international law. Embassies are protected sites. But instead of condemning the attack and putting pressure on Israel, the US has spent the past week and a half calling West Asian countries to put pressure on Iran, with Biden going as far as to warn Iran not to attack Israel and saying that his support for Israel is 'iron clad'.

The West, the UN, and UN Security Council have largely failed to condemn the attack which means Iran has no choice but to retaliate with force in order to prevent future attacks. Otherwise, the country will look vulnerable and weak, especially to the Israeli occupation government which has spent months bombing neighbouring countries like Syria and Lebanon

Just rediscovered potentially the funniest thing I’ve written in recent memory

Imagine if people wrote all their Les Mis modern aus in the style of Victor Hugo

An excerpt

so this European clothing retailer decided to advertise their jean cuts on youtube and it's unintentionally the funniest shit I've seen today. why? well.

now important context here: in German, die (pronounced 'dee') is just a feminine article, it literally means "the".

but if an ad gets placed in the middle of an English video and doesn't use a single explicitly German word for most of the ad, even a native speaker is gonna think "they want me to die how?" it keeps getting funnier.

I mean, holy shit

i will use these as reaction images until i die

Everyone gives Sherlock Holmes a hard time about being mean about Watson's writing, but honestly imagine you told your roommate "sure, you can write up an account of my work for the newspaper," thinking it would be like, about the murder, but then he publishes it and it's 90% about you, as a person, and it's a huge hit and now everyone in London knows that you hoard newspapers and do cocoaine when you're depressed. Because I think you'd be little miffed too.

people are so hard on him but the poor man lives with an influencer who shoots two vlogs a day

My favorite thing about fanfic authors is they can identify any gap in a canon timeline where characters are offscreen and exploit the ever living fuck out of it

They see a time skip of any length and go

i hate when americans get asked about the israeli/palestinian conflict and they say “well it’s not really my place to have an opinion” our country literally funds genocide against the palestinian people in the name of “defense” it absolutely is our business, we should be as mad as we can as loudly as possible. 

man.

You turn off the light, cats light up the space

You would not believe your eyes

If ten million feline eyes

Lit up the world as I fell asleep

People know that the whole "don't portray [harmful action] because viewers might recreate it" thing is a rule for children's shows right? It's supposed to be shit like "don't show peppa pig playing with fire so we don't get sued if a kid watches it and burns their house down." Not like, fanfiction for adults.

#woman showing baby how to play with blocks .jpg

Once you get to a certain level of advanced maths, you basically become a wizard.

this is what a page of my wizards spellbook looks like

Sounds like something a wizard mocking another wizard for their poorly written spellbook would say

imagine you're some guy and you're going through the woods one day and you stumble upon a house and the people who live there just give you free food and eventually let you inside and it's like nothing you've ever seen before and the people are so nice and loving towards you and then one day they decide to never let you leave again, steal your balls, and give you a stupid fucking hair cut

my name is croutons and this is my story