im gary motherfucking oak and im hungry for babies

megaman 2

I hate that this is the actual original post it feels cursed

so scared of tight pussy what if my dick comes off

had someone ask me like “why are you guys unionizing? just cuz?” and it threw me so bad i didnt even know how to answer

I am NOT trying to trick you into putting a leash on. and if you would just come here, within leashing-range, you'd be able to see that

did you guys know that people ship the real life white boys who drive nascars because i didn’t until somebody reblogged this with that added

what the hell did he mean by this

this would work on me

Yeah quiet quitting is great and all but have you tried chaotic working?

Like. I remember back in my grocery store cashier days I did so much crazy shit.

When WIC (Women, infants, and children voucher program to help low income mothers/families with children) people were in my line I would pretty much know who they were. Before the cards they had to tell us upfront they were WIC and show us their vouchers for what they were allowed to get (it was awful some times. Like. 2 gallons of milk. $4 worth of vegetables etc etc). They’d always have items hanging back, waiting to see what the total was and if they would have to take it off the belt.

I began to place the fruits/vegetables a certain way on the register scale so that like 1/2lbs of grapes read as like .28lbs or something. Then act shocked when I said that they still had X amount of lbs left. They got all their fruit and vegetables.

I think it started to kinda? Catch on to the women? Because I would have the same moms in my line month after month. And even after they switched to the cards (they worked like food stamp cards?) I’d still do the same thing. They were able to get more produce for whatever shitty max amount Indiana gave them.

Anyways. Be chaotic. It’s more fun that way.

What the fuck

This comes around every thanksgiving for like 3 years running now and it activates my fight or flight response

The only thing I trust is the cake but there’s a huge cursed vibe like a god of chaos and disorder decided to have a photoshoot and this is the result

new reblog game actually put in the tags what the blog you reblogged from tastes like

are y'all doing alright

This is great because a bunch of people are trying to be slick by tagging it as "color of the sky," accidentally outing themselves as not having used this site since 2019.

i got these knockoff boots online and instead of the brand name on the tag they have the name of an apparently nonexistent martin scorsese movie??? what the fuck

‘Thoth and the Chief Magician’, 1925. Evelyn Pau

@ebugsdotjpeg …?

Can’t believe this unfinished animation I abandoned became canon.

a friend of mine is allergic to salad, when he eats salad he literally throws up

ok. i am not your friend who is allergic to salad though

How you be allergic to salad? it’s not a specific food. It’s not. It’s an assembly method for a lovely cold-food. It doesn’t have to have dressing. it doesn’t have to have lettuce. Shredded broccoli and cheese with herbs in a oil-and-vinegar dressing. Raisins and shredded carrots in that weird sweet dressing. Weird dry salad.

I don’t know why everyone wants to be a contrarian about this. We all know they were referring to leafy green salads, which is the most common kind of salad, and lettuce is a common trigger for several GI issues (which a friend might mislabel as “allergies”). Regardless, it is possible to be allergic to pretty much every ingredient in a salad.

cool but i am still not the guy who is allergic to salad

Everyone who wants to join tumblr should be shown this post as a warning for what they’re getting into.