Their Little Secret
Pairing: Loki x Fem!Reader
Plot: This can be read as a sequel to What If or even as a solo.
The reader and Loki have been best friends for long, but eventually realised that it was more than just friendship. As they secretly step into a new world, the entire team, unbeknownst to it all, makes it their mission to make the love birds realise and confess what they feel for each other.
Warnings: Fluff, slight angst in relationship, a happy ending! Oh! And late-night hazards and a long read. Sorry!
“(Y/N), could you please take a look at this once?”
Loki waltzed in through (Y/N)’s door with a file in his hand. She was reading a book, when he knocked.
“It’s pretty late. I thought you said you’d go straight to bed. What are you doing with this poor old piece of rat-food now?”
“I did. But then I couldn’t sleep. So...I thought of doing something boring enough to lull me to sleep. But this old file actually turned out to be quite interesting,” he explained animatedly. “I just couldn’t understand one part. So, here I am!”
She eyed him suspiciously as he spread his arms to accentuate his royal presence.
“That, or you wanted to see me, and this file is a flimsy excuse,” she drawled.
“Come on, darling! I’m fond of you but not to the extent that I’ll have to make lame excuses to see you. Besides, why would I need to lie to you?”
After taking a moment to consider his words, she stepped beside him and asked him to show the file.
“It is here - this part,” he pointed at a chunk of printed information.
“This one is…” She pondered aloud. “That doesn’t make sense! Loki, w-where did you get this from? That doesn’t look like any mission report or anything. It looks like...an excerpt...from...a book?”
Before she could register, a kiss landed on her cheek. It was immediately followed by Loki excitedly wishing her, “Goodnight, darling,” and vanishing into a green glow.
She stood stunned for a while. Gradually, the tingling sensation where Loki’s lips had caressed her skin began to spread like wildfire through her face, and soon she was blushing and smiling like an idiot.
“Idiot!” She cursed him as she flopped back on the bed.
After a few seconds of fiddling with the bookmark, and staring at blurred lines on the page, she closed the book, and decided to call it a night. After what Loki just did, nothing else could compare to a happier ending to the day.
As she closed her eyes, sunny memories started flooding her mind.
It had all started hardly two months ago, when they were having their usual midnight snacks, casually talking the day’s stress away, talking nonsense - just the usual best buddy night.
But then something happened: a childish game of “what-ifs”.
It was fun, for the most part, until Loki had asked her about her intentions if she met the love of her life the next day. Already stained with painful memories of past relationships and with the hopelessness about her love life, she tried her best to evade the question. But Loki, being Loki, kept proding her until she gave him a genuine reason for her frustration.
And everything changed after that. Because in trying to save the other from falling down the emotional cliff, they had saved each other. They had found each other.
She laughed softly as she remembered the hesitancy in both their hearts as they had crossed the threshold of friendship.
That was the first time that she had kissed him. On the cheek. And that was even before she had fully realised that her feelings for him were no longer platonic.
That was the first time Loki had put an arm around her and pulled her close to him.
Another giggle escaped her as she remembered the moment when the soft morning light, and a stiff back had awakened her from her sleep.
Both were still sitting in almost the same position as they had been when they were chatting.
She had found herself cocooned in the arms of Loki, her legs tangled with his, both of them safe under the thin blanket that Loki had picked while preparing for their night. Her head rested on his chest, while his rested on the top of her head.
The last thing that she remembered from the previous night was them promising each other that no matter how things turned out, they’d always be beside one another. And then Loki had pulled her closer, and gently laid her head on his throbbing chest.
It was now peacefully moving up and down with his sleepy breaths. Before opening her eyes to reality, she stole a few moments to let this feeling sink in.
When she had closed her eyes the night before, there was an excitement so high in the air that Thor’s thunder would have been ashamed. It was the hammering of Loki’s heart that had eventually put her to sleep.
The morning brought a peaceful rhythm beneath her ears. It was beautiful, it was calm, it was...reassuring. She loved it more than the thrill of the past few hours.
But no matter how long she tried to soak herself in the feeling, the incidents of the night before still seemed somewhat unbelievable. How could something months long change overnight? Was it all a mirage then, cast by the treacherous night?
The darkness of the night sets the mind free to imagine anything, take any decision. But the clarity of the day brings logic to the forefront, which sometimes turns out to be good but sometimes not so good.
But...it had felt right. She took a deep breath to clear her mind. It still felt right. That was all the assurance that she needed for the moment.
As she turned in her bed, she remembered the raspy voice in which Loki had wished her a good morning.
The close proximity, the husky, sleep-laden voice, the sudden change in the air - everything made blood rush to her cheeks and ears. Loki had sleepily chuckled at her flushed state, though he was only slightly better than her in hiding his own flustered state.
Ever since, not a single day had passed when the two of them hadn’t thanked the stars.
She used to think that she loved Loki’s friendship more than anything. She was happy to be proven wrong when she experienced Loki’s courtship.
A different flower everyday, sometimes inside her room, laid carefully near her door, sometimes on her bedside table, and on some mornings, beside her pillow.
She was used to going out with her best friend Loki, but going out with her boyfriend Loki was an experience on a whole new level. Light brushes of the fingers, sometimes an arm around her shoulder, intertwining of fingers, occasional brushes of his lips on her temple, and not-very-occasional blushes that tinted both their skins.
Every day, before parting for the day, she was blessed with bear hugs from him - something that she had never expected him to be fond of.
It was the best time of her life! Almost every doubt that she had about this relationship not working out had evaporated long ago. It was - she dared to say - perfect!
Except for one small hiccup: they had to keep everything off the radar.
For one, they were still testing the waters. No matter how happy and confident they were with one another, their newfound relationship was still at its infancy, and they didn’t want to declare anything to the rest of the team right away.
Second, everybody in the compound had been teasing both (Y/N) and Loki about “getting a room” for a long time. They didn’t want to give them the satisfaction of knowing that they were finally correct. Well, figuratively.
Unfortunately, the team did not know that they had already confessed their feelings to each other. And so, they were desperate to make the love birds see the truth of their emotions. The Avengers, tough and stubborn as they were, never gave up. And Loki and (Y/N) simply decided to play along.
For instance, around a month and a half ago, Tony had thrown one of his usual parties at the compound, and had brought a line of apparent suitors for (Y/N) and a host of gorgeous ladies and lads to introduce to Loki.
Though the new couple was initially confused at the unbridled attention, they eventually understood what was going on: Tony Stark had decided to use the age-old recipe of jealousy to crack either one or both of them.
It was fun, they both admitted later, to dance to the tune, and give the host a frowning face when he realised that neither were biting the bait. Instead, both seemed to be enjoying themselves flirting or dancing with their respective “baits”.
What escaped the eagle eyes of the team were the furtive looks that both (Y/N) and Loki threw at each other from time to time. It wasn’t easy to masquerade those longing glances with playful teases that two friends might share. But they had to.
Late into the night, after the party was over, Loki teleported into (Y/N)’s room. The security cameras were still a threat to their little secret.
“Hello beautiful!” Loki purred when she didn’t turn all her attention towards him as she usually did, but kept herself apparently busy in making the bed.
“Is this my consolation prize for all your flirting this evening?” She tried to keep it casual but her displeasure seeped into her tone.
“Ooh, someone sounds jealous,” he drawled.
“Speak for yourself, God!”
Loki stepped towards her, and gently caught her hand, putting a pause to her actions.
She smiled as she faced him, but he could easily catch the facade.
“I know what you're trying to do. You can’t fool me, (Y/N).”
“And what is it that I’m doing?” She tried to question with the same casualness but her voice kept betraying her.
“You are trying to make it look like it didn’t affect you - me being with all those lovely people. But in reality, you are hurt, even if it is a tiny bit.”
Her smile faltered. Of course, she couldn’t fool the God of Lies!
Closing her eyes, she shook her head, “I don’t know why you’re saying this Loki. I’m perfectly fine! Why would I-”
“You and I understand each other perfectly,” Loki gently cut her off. “Or did you forget that?”
He reminded her of the one line - of the one realisation - that had triggered the tiniest thoughts of them being possibly together, if at all.
Realizing that all doors were closed for her, she tried to turn away from him, only to be stopped by the trickster.
“If it makes you feel any good,” he resumed, “it did burn me a bit, too, to watch you dance and laugh with those clowns.”
At this, she burst into laughter. Loki was glad at the change of mood, and allowed a few happy creases around his eyes as well.
“Is that true,” she asked, “or are you simply trying to make me feel better?”
He shrugged, “What do you think?”
“I’d like to believe that it’s true,” she confessed shyly.
“Well then,” she said after suppressing a wild grin that tried to crack its way through, “I guess that makes us even.”
“I’m sorry, Loki,” she sighed, “I lied earlier because I didn’t want to put any kind of pressure on you or anything. I mean...jealousy? That’s the first stage of obsession. And...I don’t want you to think that...”
“Hey,” Loki held both her hands in his, “your feelings for me will never suffocate me. On the contrary, they help me breathe. You have given my life a new purpose. I thought I was happy being your best friend. But this...this is even better. Never think that you’re putting any kind of pressure on me. None of those men or women out there, or anywhere for that matter, can bring me what I feel with you, for you.”
Words seemed insufficient for what she wanted to say. So, she simply nodded, and wrapped her arms around his torso.
“Thank you,” she murmured into his chest.
He chuckled as he ran his hand on her head, “Being jealous actually makes you look cute.”
She unwrapped herself from him just enough to look at his face, “Says the man who just confessed being jealous himself!”
“I never said I don’t look cute,” he shrugged again.
Shaking her head and laughing, she pulled his face down, and placed a warm kiss on his cheek.
“Go now, before I punch that cute face of yours.”
“When you say ‘punch’,” Loki drawled, “do you mean…’kiss every inch of’...?”
Blushing furiously, she pushed him towards the door.
Loki laughed as he wished her a lovely night, and disappeared into his usual green glow.
But the Avengers were not the ones to give up.
Not many weeks later, Natasha planned an evening at one of her favourite nightclubs. While Steve, Vision and Bucky backed out of the plan, given their previous not-so-delightful interactions with the loudness and the crowd, Thor and Tony were adamant on dragging Loki with them.
“We thought you liked a little fun! Since when did you start wearing grandpa’s knickers?” Tony snorted.
“C’mon, brother, don’t embarrass me,” Thor’s voice boomed in Loki’s room. “(Y/N) has embarrassed me enough. She didn’t want to go either. Said she’d rather sleep than be tormented by the blasted noise.”
She said what? That means she’s going to stay back-
“Wait, what?” Tony turned towards Thor with a perplexed look, “She said that?”
He turned around to face Loki again, “Are you two planning something or have you both become boring?”
No, no, no! They’ll add up…
“I am not boring!” Loki declared. He decided to stay quiet on the other option that Stark had mentioned.
“Well, then join us,” Tony shrugged.
With a dramatic roll of his eyes, Loki agreed.
Needless to say, his eyes went wide when he saw (Y/N) dressed up and ready for the outing when he was expecting her in her pajamas. When she silently questioned him, he immediately realised that he had been tricked.
I have to be more careful.
The team’s plan soon became obvious when, after a few rounds of shots, everyone made a beeline to the dance floor, leaving behind a string of excuses, and Loki and (Y/N) at the bar. Even through the crowd, the duo’s trained eyes could catch glimpses of their teammates shadowing them.
“Do they really think getting drunk will make us confess?” She shouted over the sound of the music.
“I’m a God,” he shouted back. “Midgardian liquor doesn’t affect me anyway.”
“Well, it affects me,” she shrugged and drained another shot down her throat, “and I love it!”
She had started feeling dizzy. Getting wasted could be saved for another moment when she wasn’t being spied on.
A few minutes passed in silence as neither was fond of shouting to communicate. (Y/N) bobbed her head to the music while Loki eyed the mass of bodies swaying and moving with the beats.
“Would you-” Loki began but stopped midway.
While her eyes questioned him, he silently slipped from the stool, and came to stand almost behind her.
His hot breath, dipped in a faint whiff of alcohol, hit the shell of her ear as he purred, “Would you like to dance with me?”
She was rendered immobile for a while. A small corner of her mind wondered if Loki knew what he was doing to her.
I bet he knows what he’s doing.
“I’d have loved to!” She drawled. “It’s a shame there isn’t room for a waltz here, and I wouldn’t want a God like you to hop like teeangers in the crowd.”
She felt his chest brush against her back.
“I was actually hoping that you’d be up for that dance,” he pointed at a section of the crowd where bodies were gliding against each other in the most provocative ways.
Her breath hitched again. She didn’t need to turn her head to know that Loki was smirking at his achievement.
But this time, she wouldn’t squeal, she wouldn’t push him away with a timid smile. Diffidence and boldness both tugged at polar ends of her heart until boldness won the war.
Not this time. Two can play the game, darling.
“So, what’s stopping you?” Her lips almost brushed his earlobe as she tilted her head to whisper in his ear.
Where did that come from?!
Loki wasn’t prepared for this.
It was usually him who threw mildly suggestive comments which she pushed away with a shy gesture. He never expected the tables to turn so quickly.
She did not even have enough shots to get drunk yet, he noticed.
“What happened, did the cat get your silver tongue?” She smirked.
While Loki continued to gape at her, an inkling of panic nudged her chest.
Did I take it too far? He obviously wasn’t ready for this, but…
It all must have been another prank for him, and I…
With a cackle, she sliced the apparent tension in the air. “So, finally got you, ha? Mischief!” She winked.
Turning towards the bartender, she ordered another shot.
Loki’s brain was still trying to decipher her behaviour.
Did she really mean it…? It didn’t look like a joke though…
As she focused on her drink, he thought he saw a flicker of disappointment cross her face, but the incessant dance of light and shadows made her features almost unreadable.
“You should get back to your seat, y’know?” She told him with downcast eyes.
“The team might notice and...they might know.”
Did her voice just...tremble?
Loki hated the place: the noise, the dim lights, the secrecy - he hated the way everything seemed to veil her from him.
“I think I’ll go find them.”
Downing another drink, she hopped off her seat, and disappeared in the crowd, leaving Loki to his thoughts.
Once they were back in the compound, Loki went straight to (Y/N)’s room. This time he did not sneak into her room using magic; he knocked on her door. This wasn’t the moment to play a game of cat and mouse. If the entire compound was prying on him, he would gladly allow them to. Well, maybe not gladly.
Her smile was as bright as ever.
Was it all in my mind then?
“Are you alright?” He tried to sound calm but his anxiety turned out to be more stubborn than him.
“Yes, I am. What- Come inside first.”
She stepped aside, allowing him to stride into her room, and flump down on the bed.
“I’m sorry,” he began honestly, “I thought...I thought you were upset. At the club… I thought I saw you...sad? I’m not sure. I just had this feeling that you’re probably not okay, and-”
“Loki,” she held his shoulders and gently hushed him, “I’m fine.”
Her assurance enabled him to breathe normally again.
Caressing his face, she placed a light kiss on his forehead.
“Thank you, Loki! For everything. For caring so much about me.”
“(Y/N),” he held her hand, “are you hiding something? From me?”
He didn’t miss the way she gulped before replying.
“Why would you say that?”
“Look, I’m sorry if I cross the lines sometimes. I know I tease you but those are… I’m sorry if I’ve ever made you uncomfortable or have hurt you.”
“You are an idiot! Do you know that? You’ve never hurt me or made me uncomfortable. Now, get these stupid thoughts out of your little brain, and give me that devilishly charming smile of yours.”
Despite all her compliments, his eyes did not light up as they usually did.
“Are you sure?” He asked her.
“You’ll tell me if you’re upset, won’t you? Promise me.”
He took note of how she licked her lips before nodding.
“Come here,” he pulled her in his arms, and buried his face in the crook of her neck. “And I’m not an idiot. I am smart.”
The next few weeks turned out to be more and more challenging as the team was now hell-bent on getting them exposed. What made them so sure of their relationship was still a mystery to the couple.
“Are we that obvious?” (Y/N) asked Loki one day.
“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “It is said that it shows on the faces of those in love. So, I guess...”
The words, coming from him, filled her with warmth. If that be true, and if everyone could see that they were in love only by looking at them, then she’d happily trade their secrecy for more obviousness.
But every time they came close to taking the relationship to the next level, she would find Loki backing away. Every time they had the opportunity to reveal their beautiful secret to the team, he would quickly shield both of them.
Why, Loki? Do you not want us?
It was a rainy evening when Tony had gathered everyone in the living room. At first (Y/N) thought that it was an urgent meeting for a new mission. But when she knew the actual reason behind it, she couldn’t prevent the snort that escaped her.
“Excuse me?” Tony pointed at her. “You got some problem, princess?”
“Truth or dare? Like, how old are we? Twelve?”
Tony spread his arms as if to silently make a point. “Since when did you start categorizing fun into ages? Ever since you started dating Rock of Ages?”
“Hey!” Loki made a tiny protest at his nickname.
“We are not dating,” (Y/N) deadpanned.
“And there goes my question,” Wanda sighed from across the room.
In response, (Y/N) simply rolled her eyes, and grumbled, “Kids!”
Once the game started, the team wasted no time in getting to the point: (Y/N) and Loki.
The first one to get attacked was Loki.
“No, no truth for you,” Sam chimed in just as Loki sucked in a breath to choose “truth”.
“He’s the God of Lies!” Sam announced, “He can easily slip away with any lie!”
“The bird’s got a point!” Tony agreed, followed by everyone else. “‘Dare’ for you!”
“This is not how it works,” Loki protested.
“Did you play this on Asgard? Thor?”
“No, we had never even heard of it until we came here,” the big brother responded.
“Nah-ah!” Tony didn’t let him finish. “This is exactly how it is played. Who wants to give the God of Mischief a mischievous dare?”
(Y/N) wanted to protest; she wanted to tell Tony that he was bending the rules to get to them. But any word of support would further corner them both. All she could do was play along.
“Kiss (Y/N). And you know where I mean.”
Nat’s voice yanked her out of her thoughts. She watched in horror as Loki’s expressions changed from shock to anger while the entire team cheered.
“Nat!” (Y/N) jumped up from her seat, “do you even hear yourself? He’s my best friend! We can’t just...”
“Why not?” Sam questioned with a smirk. “You seemed to be enjoying it when I was asked to kiss Buck. He’s my best buddy.”
“Speak for yourself,” Bucky mumbled.
“C’mon, it’s just a game! Don’t be a spoilsport.”
Rubbing her eyes, (Y/N) tried to find a way out of it. She knew well that if Loki kissed her, she’d melt into it. Everything would become obvious.
No, no, no!! This can’t be. They can’t just expose us like this. Loki would be so....
Wait, why isn’t he saying anything?
She opened her eyes to see Loki standing. His expression was unfathomable.
“This is outrageous!” Loki snapped and turned on his heels to walk out of the room.
For reasons she did not want to explore then, (Y/N)’s heart dropped several feet. She was expecting a similar reaction from him but wasn’t hoping for it.
Quickly gravitating back to the situation in hand, she stammered an excuse or two for his behaviour, and followed his tracks to check on him.
Once both of them were out of earshot, Tony leaned towards the group, “Did we save it or kill it.”
“Looks like we killed it,” Sam sighed.
“Trust me,” Wanda smiled, “we saved it.”
“Vision? What do you think?”
“I still do not understand why you have to torment them like this. Let them come out when they want to. It’s-”
“Okay!” Tony interrupted him. “Sorry I asked! My bad!”
The door to Loki’s room was half open when (Y/N) arrived. Gingerly, she admitted herself inside.
Loki was standing at the window, with his back towards her. His head was bowed but his hands were curled into fists on both sides of his body.
The name came out so softly that she couldn’t be sure if he had heard it, given that he did not move at all.
But before she could call him again, he spoke.
“I did not want this to happen,” his voice bore that particular kind of seriousness that usually preceded an unwanted or unhappy revelation.
“I am sorry, (Y/N).” He turned towards her, and she realised in an instant that he wasn’t fooling around.
“What are you talking about, Loki? What did you not want to happen?”
Her chest felt tighter with every passing second.
Please, not what I’m fearing.
“This,” his hand vaguely gestured towards the hallway. “Whatever happened just now. I knew they would come down to this one day. I never wanted-”
“It’s okay,” she interjected. “I did not like that either. Although they meant no harm. It was just for fun… And I understand if you're having second thoughts. This entire thing between us was just something… y’know, a spur of the moment kind of thing. I totally understand if-"
"(Y/N)! Where is this coming from? What are you even talking about?"
She couldn’t make herself look at him, for if she did, he could clearly see the moisture pooling in her eyes. She needed to appear strong.
“Loki, you’ve always been my best friend. And I’ve loved that. You know it. And it’s okay if this new turn in our relationship does not turn out to be something that you had hoped for. It happens. It’s okay-”
“It’s not okay for me,” Loki grasped her hands. “What are you saying? Why? A-are you not happy with me? Have I done something wrong? Did I offend you in any way?”
What is he saying? I thought…
As she looked up at him, a couple of drops ran down her cheeks and on her shirt.
“(Y/N), please tell me. You had promised to tell me anything and everything that upsets you. So, tell me what happened. Why do you speak of our relationship as if it was a mistake?”
“It never was a mistake for me,” she breathed, “I thought you felt...I thought you...”
The shaky way in which the question came out of him stung her more than any thought of Loki not wanting this relationship. It was then that she realised how badly she had hurt him.
He never wanted to leave! He always wanted me? Us?
She didn’t know what to say.
“I’m sorry,” she finally managed. “I thought that you...didn’t want...this. Us. I-”
“Why would you even think so? Why would you bear such thoughts when I love you with every fiber of my being?”
“You love me?” Her own voice became shaky.
“Of course, I do,” he gently placed a hand on her cheek, “always have. At first I thought it was a love for friends until that night, when I realised that I wanted to be more than just friends with you.”
More tears fell down her cheek as she rejoiced in the moment. Loki wiped them all, and placed soft kisses on each cheek.
“And all this time, I was afraid that you’re having second thoughts,” she confessed.
How do I say that it’s because you haven’t kissed me yet? And ran away from the one moment we had today, albeit in a not-so-comfortable situation?
“Because I haven’t kissed you yet?” Loki asked her.
Her heart beat so violently, she could have sworn that Loki could hear it. Her tongue felt too heavy to speak.
“I didn’t think you were ready,” he admitted. “That is the reason why I did not dance with you in the club either. I was teasing you, yes, but when you responded I was definitely taken aback. I wasn’t sure if it was you or the ambience talking. So…
You have always shied away from any comments that I make, and...I did not want to push anything on you.”
She hugged him so hard that even the Asgardian had to take two steps back to balance himself.
“I’m so, so sorry,” she wept into his shirt. “I misunderstood your actions for… I pushed you away. I thought you weren’t ready for this relationship. I’m sorry!”
Tears of both apology and relief flooded her. He tried to sush her as he rocked her slowly from side to side.
After taking a moment to compose herself, she stood straight. Loki looked at her red-eyed, tear-stained face and tutted.
“Doesn’t suit you, darling. Show me your crazy, grinning face.”
With a chuckle, she gave him a funny face-splitting smile, making both of them laugh.
“(Y/N), I didn’t want to kiss you because of a game or under the watchful eyes of that insufferable bunch of imbeciles. But if you will allow me now, I-”
“Just stop being so polite for a change, and kiss me,” she tugged at the collars of his shirt.
Loki didn’t need to be asked twice.
In the hall, the Avengers were busy speculating the outcome of their little plan, when the couple in discussion walked in. Hand in hand.
“Yes, we had changed our relationship status around six months ago,” (Y/N) announced to a stunned audience.
“And yes, we kissed. Just now. And I hope you know where I mean,” Loki added before dragging his love away towards the elevator.
“What was that?” She whispered as she was being whisked away.
“What?” Loki asked innocently, although his eyes stated otherwise.
“You didn’t need to declare that we just kissed!” She laughed as the doors of the elevator closed.
He shrugged while jabbing at a button. “They wanted us to kiss anyway. So, I gave them the satisfaction of knowledge. Besides, they need to know who you belong to now.”
“No! I also made it clear who I belong to now.”
He smiled as the doors opened to the hallway that led to his room. And once again, his words had rendered her speechless.
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You can read the backstory here.
And here's a song to sing along and keep the mood floating...
