D.A.R.E. never warned me about getting stoned on edibles and giving into the overwhelming urge to sort all of my physical and digital books into librarything.
This. This is my happy place.
elysiumwaits reblogged
We need to have a nomination for “Stupidest thing Tumblr.com has ever believed” and just move into an official Top 10 List.
For my nominations, I’m putting up:
- If you eat a chocolate bar a very specific way, you will break physics and get infinite chocolate.
or
- It is impossible that you spelled “Berenstain Bears” wrong and is, instead, more likely that the universe fractured into separate, overlapping realities in the last 20 years.
I can’t decide which is more beautiful. It’s why we need a vote.
gayantivan
this is a picture of the human brain at the moment of death. tragic and beautiful
gunpowderandspark
Fuck. That is a damn good nomination.
if you close your eyes when the train hits your brain will assume you are dead. Some find this comforting.
gunpowderandspark
We’re getting into the good ones now. This is some classic Tumblr.
Two old favourites:
“Bitch, That’s the Tubby Custard Machine” (http://imgur.com/gallery/IObQF)
and the horse dildo that was passed off as someone’s arm. (http://abakkus.tumblr.com/post/48958415162)
gunpowderandspark
This is rapidly becoming a master post of ignorances and I could not possibly be happier.
Rare blue watermelon
undrjoyed
That disease where you get purple eyes, no period, and no body hair
How have we gone this far without anyone mentioning the bird in the chocolate fountain
soap makes water molecules smaller
I nominate the “we are killing the earth” picture of the earth in comparison from 1978 to 2012
tinydickhaver
the dog with the slice of ham on its face that everyone thought was a gigantic burn scar
“Tequila is the only alcohol thats not a depressant so you can drink as much of it as you like”
that post with the picture of the joker without makeup and people thinking it was a real person and defending him
painisthecleanser
that photo of voldemort being passed off as an aborted fetus
kingdomheartsddd
The two way mirror
“listen here, cumslut.”
I can’t believe you guys forgot someone trying to pass off a picture of the inside of a fig as a microscopic view of the inside of a vagina.
osunism
I can’t believe I was on Tumblr for every single one of these posts.
whyamionlyabletouse32characters
all the links on this post are broken and some arent given so heres a compilation of links for the stupidest things tumblr has believed (i tried to find the og post for most of these but some of them are posts/articles about said posts)
Reblogin, so i can find this later
elysiumwaits reblogged
Please stop trigger tagging with #epilepsy tw/cw/warning/etc.
I need every single person to understand how horrible tumblr’s tagging system is
I go into the tag for epilepsy and its all flashing lights. We can’t use our own tag because people without epilepsy fill it up with improper warnings.
Use ‘flashing’ in place of ‘epilepsy’ in your tags. You aren’t warning people of epileptics, you’re warning us of flashing lights. Please please tag properly. Epileptics say this endlessly and constantly and it’s ignored. You are risking lives by doing this.
Here’s proof of what I mean:
THIS POST IS 100% OKAY TO REBLOG, I ENCOURAGE PEOPLE WITHOUT EPILEPSY TO ESPECIALLY DO SO!
Just to clarify, in case people are wondering: Tumblr allows people to automatically block posts with certain tags.
So that if there is something flashing in your post (or something that causes a flashing effect when scrolling, like the first design I came up with for the Disability Pride Flag), tagging that post with “Flashing” will allow people who do have epilepsy to block that post and not be harmed by it.
(this is also why you should never censor your tags on Tumblr, BTW. We’re not TikTok; you won’t be penalized for having certain words in your tags. But if you alter a tag that people are using to control their own dashboards, it won’t be blocked, and they’ll see something they don’t want to – or be exposed to something that could cause them serious harm).
elysiumwaits reblogged
#dirty minds worldwide
elysiumwaits reblogged
did u see them btw...
Omg there's so many!!
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ok
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MOJO DOJO CASA SERVER! A multifandom discord server! (because tumblr sometimes hides posts with links, link will be in the reblog or you can send me an ask/dm)
We have general channels for tv/movies, games, and other types of fandoms!
There’s also more specific channels for: Stranger Things (as well as the harringrove channels from before we went multifandom) Star Wars Spider-Verse Teen Wolf Supernatural Vivziepop (Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss) Baldur’s Gate 3 Dragon Age Marvel Original works and we just added Fallout channels for both the show and the games!
We’re always willing to add more if something is popular enough.
We’re not overwhelmingly big and we’re all super nice so come join us!
must be 18+
reblogs appreciated
Harringrove for C, or just Billy for P?
Billy Hargrove is desperate for touch. Steve can tell by the way Billy's fingers wriggle under the hem of his shirt whenever he's close enough (and Billy is always close enough). Blunt fingernails will scratch lightly at his lower back when he's fighting with the coffeemaker on the counter, before Billy even says "hi" or "fuck you" or anything. And then, he'll just rest them there, the slightest touch of skin on skin, like Billy can't help but reach over and soak up Steve's warmth, like he can't stand not to be touching Steve.
And like, Steve actually listens when Robin tells him about her psychology classes and her papers and shit. He's had an experience or two himself, of course, so he's not exactly a stranger to trauma. So he understands that Billy might actually hunger for it, in that nebulous way that Steve tosses concepts around in his brain. He gets it in that same unspoken way that he gets why Billy doesn't talk to his dad and why Max spends a lot of time at their place instead of home.
But he doesn't know what to do with it.
The truth is that Steve? Steve also longs for touch, loves to get his hands on Billy. But after a little bit, Steve can't stand the feeling, tries to twist away because sometimes, the simple brush of Billy's fingers against his skin sends shocks skittering through his skin.
"It's good," he tries to explain. It's important to him that Billy knows Steve wants the touch as much as Billy wants to give it. "It's just... too much. Sometimes? Like, it's so good it almost hurts."
And Billy says, soothingly, "You don't have to explain, baby." Later, when they're curled around each other on top of the blankets and half-asleep, he'll add that he likes touching something without also having to destroy it.
elysiumwaits reblogged
do i even need to say it?
nah i got a feeling about this one tumblr
elysiumwaits reblogged
The Hurt/Comfort Alphabet
A: Alleviate - How do they go about relieving persistent physical pain?
B: Bedridden - How do they behave when they’re sick?
C: Cling - Whose physical touch is considered most welcome in their minds when they are in need? Is there a specific type of touch they respond well to?
D: Deathbed - How would they react if they realized they may not recover from their injuries?
E: Emergency - What is their gut reaction when someone they care about is hurt?
F: Fight - Are there circumstances under which they would not accept treatment or care? If so, what are they?
G: Ghosts - How has their past shaped the kind of comfort they respond to best?
H: Home - What things (objects, sensations or people) remind them they’re safe after a scary situation?
I: Isolation - How do they soothe themselves when no one is around to soothe them?
J: Joy - When was the first time they were truly happy after going through something terrible?
K: Kindness - Do they believe they deserve the comfort they receive? Why or why not?
L: Levity - What or who helps them take their mind off of the circumstances?
M: Music - Is there a song that comforts them? Why is it comforting to them?
N: Nostalgia - What things that comforted them as a kid still work today? Does anyone know that?
O: Overworked - Who or what tells them to stop working and take care of themselves?
P: Please - Have they ever begged for someone to comfort or stay with them? What was that incident like?
Q: Questions - Are they eager to talk about what or why they’re hurting? Why or why not?
R: Relief - How do they react to the realization that they will soon be fully recovered?
S: Scared - What would it take for them to admit that they’re scared?
T: Time - How long does it take for them to feel better after an ordeal or illness? Do they tend to lie about how soon they feel better?
U: Ugly - What part of their recovery process are they ashamed of, if any?
V: Valiant - Has anyone told them they were brave for facing what they did? How would they react if someone did?
W: Why? - How did they process what happened to them?
X: Xenas - Do they see anyone as an inspiration in their recovery? Does their inspiration know about this?
Y: Yearn - What gesture, person or thing do they desperately want, but would never actually ask for?
Z: Zero - What is the best way to comfort them without touching them?
elysiumwaits reblogged
top tier character-building device in pokemon games is when a seemingly antagonistic character has a golbat on their team and then later has it evolved into a crobat, which requires significant friendship, thus signalling that the character was always a kind person inside (plumeria), is growing past their issues and learning to be kinder (silver), may hold a spark of kindness that undermines their cold and calculating image (cyrus), etc etc
Meanwhile, Ghetsis—who is an antagonist who pretends to be an advocate for Pokemon rights—faces off against you with an under-leveled Hydreigon, which in the canon lore of the series only happens when someone forces evolution early, and that Hydreigon uses a full-power Frustration in B2W2, suggesting that it absolutely loathes Ghetsis.
For any non-pokemon players:
In pokemon games, there’s a hidden stat called friendship, which maxes out at 255 points; there are two (major) moves that are affected by this:
Return, which gets stronger the higher a pokemon’s friendship stat is, capping at 102 base power with 255 friendship (for context, hyper beam has a base power of 150)
And frustration, which does the opposite, getting stronger the lower a pokemon’s friendship stat is, capping out at 102 base power when the pokemon is at 0 friendship
The EXTRA fucked up thing is, almost NO pokemon has a base friendship of 0. The only pokemon that do are legendary pokemon and buneary. So Ghetsis actively lowered his Hydreigon’s friendship, and the only way to do that in-game is to let your pokemon faint often without using healing items on them
In other words Ghetsis is a major cunt
wh
what’s up with buneary???
Buneary fucking hates you by default. It’s also another friendship-dependent evolution line.
for others who are clueless in the poking men, this is the tiny bunny that fucking hates you
Bunneary hates your guts with the force of Gods
Things I did not know.
Lately I've been writing high and editing sober. I've never felt more like a monkey writing Shakespeare than I do right now.
elysiumwaits reblogged
Wild Heart is OUT NOW!
Wild Heart is a free, digital-only, NSFW zine focusing on AOS (kelvinverse) spirk! Download the zine over on itch.io and enjoy the beautiful illustrations and fics done by our talented contributors!
I have insane stress dreams
Last night I dreamed that I got into a fistfight with beloved country singer Randy Travis. We were shooting a 20s gangster movie, and the strikingly well-dressed baby was holding the last shrimp cocktail and the last bear claw. For some reason we were on a skyscraper that was built on a yacht.
Anyway, he won, I got knocked off of the yacht, and I woke up wanting a donut.
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