spotify users!!! tell me the fourth song in your second daily mix playlist... mine is bbyong by saturday hehehe

(Updated) Symptoms Compilation

Before anyone says see a professional I have every intention to and have tried before however every therapist I've been sent to has only ever focused on the moods and anxiety side of things so I was wondering if someone could give me any ideas of what these symptoms might point to that way I could look into seeing someone more specialised and suited to my needs instead of the same anxiety talk therapist.

1. Unusual Perceptual Experiences/Hallucinations- Mainly tactile and auditory though sometimes visual aswell.

2. Paranoia- Constantly feeling as though I'm being watched and followed. Or as though people are talking negatively about me and judging me.

3. Chronic heightened anxiety that doesn't lessen with familiarity.

4. Episodes of self isolation.

5. Unstable moods

6. Homicidal and Suicidal Ideation- Constant thoughts of harming/killing myself and others (and animals) and knowing how I'd do it as well.

7. Failure to uphold professional obligation

-uninterested in upholding college obligation, no interest or drive in passing the course or completing it/ No motivation or drive to do well and succeed

8. Unstable future plans

-shifting career plans, wanting to be a doctor one week, author the next, embalmer, unsure whether I'm going to be alive to see them through.

9. No childhood memories

- no solid childhood memories before age

10. Poor perception of time

- trouble telling whether it's been 10 minutes or one hour

11. Chronic feelings of emptiness

12. Poor communication skills

- failure to properly articulate my feelings and emotions and needs

13. obsession with gore/death/violence from a young age

(Intense obsession with graphic gore and violence and will hunt videos out)

14. Being indifferent/apathetic towards all kinds of relationships (familial, platonic, sexual or romantic) and not actively wanting them

15. Low empathy and sympathy- not being able to feel emotions for other people

16. Inability to maintain focus and keep a train of thought.

17. Chronic low self esteem

18. Self Harm- biting, hitting or cutting

19. Difficulty showing and receiving affection

20. Inappropriate emotional response

-won't cry over the death of a family member or pet, however will cry over pointless things like the specific food I want to eat not being in, will laugh at people getting hurt in extreme ways, or pull a knife on someone for changing the channel when I'm watching something

21. Unable to feel sad regarding death beit family or pet.

22. Intense connection to fictional characters to the point of trying to become and imitate them. Seeing myself as them.

23. Doesn't care about people's feelings or opinions unless they reflect me in a negative light.

24. Unstable sense of self- the sort of person I want to be, how I want to be perceived and what I want to do.

25.Ahedonia- Things that once interested me no longer do. Nothing interests me.

26. Executive dysfunction

27. Emotionally dependent on music

-will become unstable and irritable and paranoid without

28. Difficulty getting to sleep

29. Immature and rambled speech

- friends and family have said it's hard to understand and follow what I'm saying

30. Cant form strong opinions

31. Can't feel deep emotions or feelings

32. Chronic boredom.

33. Nearly completely apathetic.

hotch casually holding the assualt rifle in the bg

growing up I was always afraid of being Found Out. not sure what I was hiding. just my whole self I guess

cannibalism can actually be so romantic n intimate when you don’t have a bitch in your ear telling you it isn’t

There's just something about blood that's so romantic

me

Bride of Re-Animator (1990) dir. by Brian Yuzna

Having a personality disorder does not make you abusive.

Having narcassistic traits does not make you abusive.

Not understanding or experiencing empathy does not make you abusive.

Stop demonising cluster B personality disorders.

Every time I wrote your name, I lied. Every time I wrote your name, it was the truth.