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Za'taria

@zatarias-pandora

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elicathebunny

learning to let go of lingering negative emotions + Entering a calm state and regulating emotions.

(@anitalenia for the divider ౨ৎ)

Holding Grudges and struggling to let go.

Holding a grudge can affect you in many different ways ...

✦ Mentally:

  • Increased Stress: Constantly thinking about past experiences can keep your body at high-stress levels, leading to high cortisol and other stress hormones. Over time, this can contribute to anxiety.
  • Heightened Anxiety: Holding onto a grudge can lead to feelings of anxiety, as you may constantly worry about encountering the person you're resentful towards or replaying the situation in your mind. This can create a cycle of rumination and distress.
  • Negative Mood: Resentment and anger are negative emotions that can change your perception of the world and affect your mood. Holding a grudge can lead to feelings of bitterness, hostility, and general negativity, making it difficult to experience joy or contentment.
  • Impaired Relationships: Grudges can strain relationships, both with the person you're holding a grudge against and with others in your life. It can lead to communication breakdowns, conflict, and social withdrawal, which can further bring up feelings of isolation and loneliness.
  • Impact on Self-Esteem: Holding a grudge can also impact your self-esteem and self-worth. It may lead you to question your own value, especially if the grudge is related to mistreatment.

✦ Physically:

  • Increased Risk of Cardiovascular Problems: Chronic stress and negative emotions can contribute to high blood pressure, heart disease, and other cardiovascular issues. Holding onto a grudge can keep the body in a constant state of stress, leading to high levels of stress hormones like cortisol, which can negatively impact the heart and blood vessels.
  • Weakened Immune System: Prolonged stress and negative emotions can weaken the immune system, making you more prone to infections and illness. Holding a grudge can activate the body's stress response, leading to chronic inflammation and a weakened immune response.
  • Digestive Problems: Stress and negative emotions can also affect the digestive system, leading to issues like stomach pain, indigestion, and irritable bowel syndrome (IBS). Holding a grudge can increase these symptoms by keeping the body in a heightened state of stress, which can mess with normal digestive processes.
  • Sleep Disturbances: Negative emotions and stress can interfere with sleep quality and quantity, leading to problems like insomnia or disrupted sleep patterns. Holding onto a grudge can keep the mind racing with negative thoughts, making it difficult to relax and fall asleep.
  • Pain and Tension: Emotional stress and tension can manifest physically as muscle tension, headaches, and other bodily aches and pains. Holding a grudge can increase these symptoms by keeping the body in heightened tension.

Why might we struggle to let these feelings go?

  • Emotional Attachment: Negative emotions, like anger and hurt, can be intense and create a strong emotional attachment to the incident.
  • Need for Justice: We often feel the need for fairness or justice, and holding onto a grudge can feel like a way of ensuring the other person is held accountable.
  • Fear of Vulnerability: Letting go of a grudge might require forgiving someone, which makes us feel vulnerable and exposed.
  • Identity and Ego: Sometimes, grudges become part of our identity. Letting go can feel like losing a part of ourselves or admitting we were wrong.
  • Lack of Closure: Not having a clear resolution or apology can make it harder to move on, as the issue feels unresolved.
  • Recurrent Triggers: Frequent reminders of the event or person can continuously reopen the emotional wound, making it harder to let go.
  • Negative Reinforcement: Replaying the event in our minds can reinforce negative feelings and make them harder to release.
  • Low Self-Esteem: When we feel bad about ourselves, we might cling to grudges to deflect attention from our insecurities.

How can we try to overcome grudges?

  • Acknowledge Your Feelings: Recognise that you're holding a grudge and understand why. Reflect on what happened and how it made you feel.
  • Express Yourself: If possible, talk to the person you're holding a grudge against. Express your feelings calmly and honestly without being confrontational.
  • Empathy: Try to see things from the other person's perspective. Understanding their point of view can help you feel more compassionate and less resentful.
  • Forgiveness: Remember that forgiving someone is more for your peace of mind than theirs. It doesn't mean you condone their behaviour; it just means you're ready to move on.
  • Focus on the Present: Let go of the past and focus on the present moment. Holding onto grudges keeps you stuck in the past.
  • Self-Care: Take care of your mental and physical health. Exercise, meditate, or engage in activities that make you happy and relaxed.
  • Set Boundaries: If someone continually hurts you, it’s okay to set boundaries. Protecting yourself can help you let go of grudges while maintaining your well-being.
  • Seek Help: If you’re struggling to let go, consider talking to a therapist or counsellor. They can provide professional guidance and support.

How to enter a calm state.

  • Mediation: When we pay attention to our breath, we are learning how to return to, and remain in, the present moment—to anchor ourselves in the here and now on purpose, without judgment. This increased awareness allows you to recognise and understand your emotions as they arise, rather than reacting impulsively. Regular meditation trains your mind to stay calm and composed. This practice helps in regulating emotions and reducing the intensity of negative feelings like anger, anxiety, and sadness. As you become more skilled at meditation, you'll find it easier to maintain emotional balance and respond to situations in a more thoughtful and measured way.
Here are five reasons to meditate: 1. Understanding your pain 2. Lower your stress 3. Connect better 4. Improve focus 5. Reduce brain chatter

  1. Emotional Expression: Journaling provides a safe space to express and process emotions. Writing about feelings, experiences, and challenges can help individuals acknowledge and make sense of their emotions, leading to increased emotional awareness and regulation.
  2. Stress Reduction: Writing about stressful events or worries can act as a form of stress relief. By putting thoughts onto paper, individuals can release pent-up emotions and gain a sense of control over their circumstances, thereby reducing stress levels.
  3. Problem Solving: Journaling encourages reflection and introspection, allowing individuals to gain insights into their thoughts and behaviors. This process can help identify patterns, triggers, and potential solutions to problems, fostering personal growth and resilience.
  4. Self-Discovery: Regular journaling promotes self-discovery and self-awareness. Through writing, individuals can explore their values, beliefs, strengths, and weaknesses, leading to a deeper understanding of themselves and their identity.
  • Physical Exercise: Regular exercise can help reduce stress and improve your mood. Activities like yoga, walking, or swimming can be particularly calming. Stretching is often associated with physical benefits like improved flexibility and reduced muscle tension, but it also offers numerous mental benefits. It helps to release physical tension in the muscles, which is closely linked to reducing mental stress. As your body relaxes, so does your mind, leading to a calmer state of being. Stretching enhances your awareness of your body and its movements. This increased body awareness can help you become more in tune with how stress and emotions affect your physical state, allowing you to manage your mental health more effectively.
  • Watch what you consume: Put down the phone and silence any distractions. Purposefully make your environment peaceful enough for you to have a clear mind. Don't disrupt your session, stay in this calm moment for as long as you need to to properly reflect on yourself and make a difference to your emotions.
  • Allow yourself to dig deeper into your emotions without rejecting any ideas:

Really ask questions to make the most of the state you are in. Don't reject or suppress any feelings that come up, accept them and use those thoughts to understand yourself better. This will help you let go or work out anything that is bothering you. Understand your triggers and why you feel this way by prodding yourself with more and more specific questions. This may be an uncomfortable process but by understanding what is blocking you from being completely at peace within yourself then it must be done.

example: I feel like this -> why do I feel like this? Well, because this happened -> Why does this make me upset? Because it reminds me of this -> Why can't I let it go? and so on.
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tripthedharmadivine

Not gonna lie… Sammy looked like he was fighting for his life at Jazz Fest.

While Jake was just… fucking…😤

Don’t get me started on this mf’er 🫠

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zatarias-pandora

He was dying and it was so hilarious to watch that nola heat is no joke 😭

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thattargboy
Imagine…
Being Aemond’s lover and learning his mother plans to betroth him to a daughter of Borros Baratheon for a political alliance.
GIF by alicentloyalist

“What?”

“Please don’t make me say it again,” Aemond said softly, your hands still in his. You could hardly understand what was happening.

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autismvampyre
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deadmomjokes

It recently came up in conversation with my toddler that some birds can talk, and this has caused her great concern.

See, we were talking about how movies are pretend and how in real life, animals don’t talk. I mentioned that there are some birds who talk a little bit, but not like the animals in movies, and she just looked at me like “???”

So I informed her that some kinds of parrots can copy sounds that people make, and can learn how to say words. I thought this would give her a giggle, as fun new facts often do, but she was just deeply perplexed and a little worried about this.

“Birds can talk?” “Do they ask questions?” “What do they say?” Why do they talk?” “Do chickens talk?” “What about Blue Jays?” “Why do some birds talk?” “How do they talk?” “Birds TALK???”

We showed her a video of a parrot doing the “Hello, pretty bird, give a kiss” thing, and she was dead silent the whole time, hugging her comfort pillow with her knees to her chest. We asked if she wanted us to turn it off, and she shook her head. But we also asked if she wanted to see another one, and she shook her head even harder.

I don’t know why it has distressed her so greatly to learn that some birds can mimic human speech; but then again, I don’t know why it doesn’t distress the rest of us more to know that some birds can mimic human speech.

I keep thinking about that post that’s like “The first person to hear a parrot talk was probably Not Okay.” Because that’s exactly what happened. She had never been introduced to the concept, and her entire worldview got SHOOK.

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philosophicalparadox

Part of why Ravens are considered Spooky Bad Things We Associate With The Faeries is because they can and do mimic human speech - but much, much better than a parrot. With a parrot, you can tell something is off about the sound. You can tell it doesn’t belong to a human. Ravens don’t sound like that, no, cause they’re overacheivers. (And passerines). They sound EXACTLY like the voice of whoever they are mimicking.

But more importantly they love the sound of human laughter. No one knows why. But it is totally, 100% possible, and it happens to this day, to walk along the paths in the Black Forest and suddenly hear a strange kind of giggling sound, or maybe even a very clear, definitely human sounding “hello?” “Hiiiii!” Or “let’s go!”.

However, it takes a lot of practice for them to copy sounds as perfectly as they do, so you’re equally likely to hear something that definitely sounds human-like, but the words make no sense and the sound is unlike any language you know.

Ravens at the Tower of London do this all the time. Theyre pretty sociable with humans though, so they do it quite openly. I have seen videos of people, mostly Americans, look absolutely spooked out of their skins when a big ol’ raven (mind ye, these are birds that are 2 feet tall with a 5 foot wingspan) comes waltzing up on the deck and starts talking to them.

And ravens, especially the ones there that have been bred and raised by humans for centuries, don’t just imitate - they have one of the same language processing genes we do, and they understand the way a toddler might that things, places, and individuals have names, and can string together basic sentences much like an african grey.

I know because I used to work with one, Darlene, who knew, quite well, what she wanted and how to ask for it. If you were preparing her breakfast, she would hop on up and investigate. She used to be an illegal pet, and had been taught “manners”. That is to say, if she went for something and you told her, sternly, “mind your manners missy!” She would stop, look at you, perhaps for up to a minute, and then point with her beak to what she wanted. If that did not work, she would ask, in plain English, “grape?” Or “Darl have grape?” And lord help you if you gave her anything less than what she asked for. She would throw it at you, and try to bite you, sometimes while saying “No!” In the same tone as I imagine she was reprimanded in her home.

So yeah. Parrots arent the only ones.

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summer-fruits-and-cream

WHAT

Was anyone gonna tell me that ravens can talk or was I meant to read about it on a tumblr post?!

[plain text 1: what

plain text 2: Was anyone gonna tell me that ravens can talk or was I meant to read about it on a tumblr post?!]

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hussyknee

This one’s even freakier. The way he went from a nasal male voice to perfectly imitating the woman is actually kind of scary.

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ruby-white-rabbit
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mistytwooo

I be wanting to finish some of y’all stories so bad lol. Y’all don’t know how to make the mc rage, all y’all make her do is be sad. You can definitely be both, it’s okay to feel mad as fuck when something personal happens.

Not everyone is soft hearted and takes shit lightly, I’m tired of seeing reader being mistreated without her getting her lick back.

Sometimes revenge is needed im so tired of the “I have to be the mature person” sometimes being mature doesn’t work and you have to beat a bitch up.

Justice for yn in these family sully and twilight fics lol

I need more angry yn, and I love writing it.

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sugarcanex

Pls!! I’m begging for someone to write a series on maybe some deep sea na’vi who live deeper under the ocean. They could have like maybe darker skin so they can’t been seen but when they reach their home (like in the video down below) they sort of glow!! 😭

And maybe they have more mermaid like features like a fins, tails, maybe longer arms to help the swim, etc. Maybe their unknown but have stories about them and stuff about them helping in the last war against the Metikayan, but they only come up into the shallow waters every 100 years. (Almost like half the na’vi like since they live around 180 years.) So people only get to see them at least once in their life time but only the clans leaders and a few select people get to see them and hold a small private celebration when they do come up from the deep waters.

I was really thinking to get the story going what if a little bit before the war they come back up but a bit early sensing the animals in the water distress and the stress of their fellow brothers and sisters that have been hurt or had their homes burnt down.

And what if the Reader is next in line to be Olo’eyktan and has to have a right of passage that has to deal with them being on the upper part of the ocean (but not close to land) and what if in the process one of the Sully’s see her. 🙈

I was definitely basing this off of black panther and the Talokan. I’m begging for someone to write a story line on this. 🤭 could maybe be a Lo’ak x Reader.

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lvrcpid
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refiwrites

whenever this song plays its just-

i feel like im at ease- most of the time i just want to cry but- its so enchanting

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