Don’t know what to do
Hi
I know I’ve been gone for a while but it’s for a few reasons.
I’ve been doing a lot of personal growth lately and i don’t really have the same, er, opinions I used to have when I first started this blog. I’m not as concerned about what other people ship (as long as it’s not literally illegal) because simply, I have better priorities about what I should be putting my mental energy into. And I feel like that might upset people since I’m not really an “anti” anymore since I feel like putting so much effort into the lives of people I’ll never meet.
So I’ve kinda abandoned this blog, because I didn’t want to upset people. I still believe that shipping minors and adults is NOT okay. But, other than that, I don’t think that limiting what people will write in fiction will actually solve any problems.
Please continue to hold people accountable for being racist or homophobic, but I don’t believe that we should hate people for coping with thoughts and feelings they can’t control.
Because I’ve been sexually assaulted, twice, and I feel that pushing down the thoughts I have as immoral or that I’m a bad survivor, is counterintuitive to self growth in healing. So no, I DONT think it’s okay to call survivors “freaks” by indulging in media that some would consider bad, because as long as they aren’t hurting themselves or others, and keeping their content flagged and protected from those who don’t want to see, I don’t care. Because I struggle with intrusive thoughts, a lot, and that’s what most of these people are going through.
And while some say that it’s not a good way to cope, well, you don’t know that. You don’t know the person, because everyone is an individual. Unless you are a liscensed therapist, you have no right to tell strangers online how to cope with trauma. And some people just like to explore certain topics, as long as they are respectful, why care?
I had this change of heart recently when I realized I worried so much about the actions of others, I never thought about how it all affected me, at th end of the day. And it wasn’t good. I was hupervigilant, overly stressed, constantly worried, etc. it wasn’t good. And when I stopped caring and tried to look at things from their perspective, I didn’t mind as much. Because at the end of the day, fandom is a place to enjoy and escape reality, this shitty shitty fucking world, and who am I to tell others how to enjoy things. (As long as it’s not illegal).
So, with that, if you want to unfollow me that’s fine, if you have anymore questions for me, ask them! But please send me asks like “are you a freak now?” Because no, I’m not, I’m just a human dealing with my trauma without bringing other people down anymore. I still love mchanzo, but I kinda abandoned the fandom due to how toxic some people are. And I realize a lot of minors follow me, and I apologize if I let you down, and to my old friends as well. But I feel like I can’t just leave/be on hiatus without explaining why. And I hope this post can give you insight.
I might return in the future, but for now I’m officially on a hiatus
