Take A Little Chance
Pairing: Lucas North x reader
Warning: mention of suicide, fluff
They entered your apartment seeing it was empty. Lucas was restless as he walked through the apartment trying to calm himself and figure out where had you gone off to.
“Lucas, I have lost y/n´s contact,” Tariq spoke in his earpiece while Lucas looked around, his brain fuming. Then he noticed your keys on the kitchen table and following his hunch he tracked your footsteps through your home into the bedroom and saw lightly opened the door that led into the fire latter. Going through the door Lucas climbed the latter into the roof and twirling around trying to find you but obviously, you weren´t on the roof.
“Y/n where are you?” he asked through the earpiece hoping you would reply to him but nothing. He was getting scared now.
“Y/n´s contact is still down Lucas, I´m working on it,” Tariq replied.
“Still no answer,” he spoke again.
“Keep trying,” Harry whispered behind him. Everyone refused to think you were dead.
“Lucas, I want to know the moment you see her, right now Jack Colville is capable of anything,” Harry warned Lucas who without saying anything rushed forward trying desperately to find you, hoping you would be alive and well.
“She could be anywhere,” he finally spoke up, slightly out of breath looking around. it was like finding a certain needle in a pile of needles.
“Keep looking Lucas,” Harry´s commanding tone of voice left no room to give up. Not that he was going to. He needed to let you know how he felt about you, that he loved you and wanted to see if there was a future between you two.
In the meanwhile, you were following Jack´s steps into a dark tunnel making you agitated, your breathing hitching going shallow. Then all of a sudden you felt a barrel of the gun pressed against the back of your head halting you in the mids of walking forward.
“Just give me the gun y/n,” Jack spoke quietly behind you.
Cursing, you closed your eyes for a moment before giving up and handing him the gun.
Taking the gun from you he nudged his almost making you flinch.
“Now just keep going, don´t turn back”
Pulling away from you Jack waited for you to start walking forward in the dark area not knowing where exactly you were but hoping someone would come to help you. Looking around you concluded you were down in some cellar but when Jack switched on the blue light, you frowned. it looked like someone had set an office or hiding place of some kind in there but you weren´t sure why Jack let you down here.
“If you´re thinking about calling help, don´t bother, no one can reach us here,” Jack stated like he was reading your mind.
“Why did you do it?” you asked turning to look at him.
“Mina…,” Jack spoke the name in a way you knew she had a manor part in his life.
“You signed her death warrant,”
“What are you talking about?” you were genuinely clueless about what he was talking about but that gave you some time for anyone to be able to find you.
“What she was to you Jack?” you asked after hearing him explaining what he thought you knew very well.
“You were in love with her,” you stated, little surprised but that revelation made him more dangerous than ever. A man losing the love of his life was one of the most dangerous creatures in the world and one stood right in front of you, gun pointed on your face. You were in big trouble and now it started really to sink in just how deep trouble you were.
“They gave her a new identity and a place to stay. Even I didn´t know where she was, but it was the price to pay. We could be part but she would be safe, that was the promise….until you broke it,” Jack accused anger flashing in his eyes. Deciding it was best to keep quiet and let him rant you watched and waited.
“Reap and sow, y/n, reap and sow. Tell me, did you know about Mina and me? And decide to do it anyway?” Jack asked sounding hurt.
“Or was it just another name, another anonymous victim to you?”
“I didn´t sign anything,” you finally confessed, calmly as you could saw him nearly chuckling to your arrogance.
“There´s no point in trying to deny it. I expected more of you,”
“When we found the chip, we changed the name in the database. You have the wrong person Jack,” you told him, watching his expression changing as he realized you were telling the truth. The nerve on his cheek twisted as he stared at you.
“That´s not possible…” he said quietly looking at any evidence you were lying to him.
“Who was it? Who signed the authorization?” he demanded while starting to lose his composure.
“It matters to me!” he growled letting anger taking hold of him,
“I don´t know who signed it. An officer who happened to be behind the desk that day. Could´ve been me, could have been anyone, even you,”
“No,” Jack shook his head not wanting to believe a word you said.
“We all would have done the same,” you continued.
“The information we got was valuable. It saved hundreds of lives,”
“And that makes it okay to sacrifice Mina´s life?”
“Yes, yes, it does, to save countless lives, we have to be able to sacrifice a few innocent people along the way. that is what this job is all about Jack,”
“No, no, no, no,” Jack kept shaking his head while staring at you. He was in total denial.
“Don´t make the decision you can´t live with,” you pointed out staring at him right back in the eye.
“There has to a reckoning….” Jack sighed making the decision that would haunt you for a while.
“Goodbye y/n…,” he spoke and turning the gun at his temple he pulled the tricker and shot himself in front of you.
Looking at him dropping onto the floor you turned away feeling sick hiding your face in your hand. You didn´t see that coming. You didn´t think Jack would be someone who would shoot himself but you guessed, a man in love was capable of doing anything if they saw no way out.
Taking the shaky breath you pushed the urge to vomit back down while your whole body was shaking like a leaf. You needed to get out of this place. Avoiding to look at Jack´s bleeding body you managed to walk back into the stairs and headed out as quickly as you could.
Lucas was about to lose it when he suddenly saw you coming out from one of the staircases he hadn´t checked yet.
“Harry, I see her! She is alive,” Lucas spoke up hearing everyone wearing an earpiece to sigh in relief.
“Good, bring her home,” Harry replied.
Lucas ripped the earpiece off of his ear and rushed toward you seeing you were shaking, clearly in shock.
“Y/n!” he shouted as he got closer looking at any signs that you were injured but saw nothing.
Lifting your gaze you saw Lucas running toward you concerned expression on his face.
“Lucas….” you murmured and before you knew it, Lucas had his arms around you pulling you into a tight embrace.
“God I thought I´ve lost you when I heard your yell and the gunshot earlier,” he whispered in your ear caressing your hair. You felt safe at that moment and the adrenaline in your veins slowly faded away leaving you merely shocked by what you had gone through. gripping his jacket you buried your face in it breaking down into helpless crying.
“Hey, hey, …you´re safe….” Lucas tried to comfort you, he was surprised you would start crying in his presence since he had always thought you weren´t a crier.
“What happened? Where´s Jack?” he asked quietly listening to your sobbing ignoring the fact you were soaking his shirt.
“Dead…” you managed to say tightening your hold on his jacket.
Lost in words Lucas guided you back to your apartment where his team was still waiting and when they saw you were alright, a mess, but alright they closed the operation heading back to the Grid.
You were guided to a couch while Lucas went to your wardrobe ordering you to come into his place for the night. There was no way he would let you sleep alone after what you had gone through.
“Lucas, seriously, I don´t need a babysitter,” you sighed after calming down and wiping your face you watched as Lucas packed your bag giving you a stern look.
“Yes, you do. I was scared to death that something had happened to you. I don´t want to feel that way ever again,” Lucas turned his attention back to your clothes missing the baffled look on your face.
Sighing Lucas closed his eyes before turning back to face you. Here goes for nothing he thought to himself.
“I love you, ever since I told you what Sarah had tried to do, you stayed by my side trying to cheer me up and give me something else to think about. I guess I had always feeling for you but since I wasn´t sure if you would return them, I settled being friends with you and got involved with Sarah. Which was a mistake, I realize that now but when I heard the gunshot I was genuinely afraid I had lost you before I had the chance to tell you how I felt,”
You stared at him doubt founded, blinking. He loved you? You were speechless. You had budding feelings for him ever since you saw him the first time but to think, Lucas loved you threw you in a spiral of emotions you weren´t sure how to handle.
Lucas saw that in your face and deciding now wasn´t the time dwell in deeper to that subject he merely ushered you out the apartment toward the black car that two agents had been driving.
“You two can drive the van back to the base,” Lucas ordered earning a nod from them while you sat on the passenger seat.
Getting in the car, Lucas started the engine and drove down the street toward the center of London where he was living at the moment. You were more than a little nervous about sleeping at Lucas´place after his confession but as the car turned into the highway you weren´t able to back down anymore. Although the look he had given you told you he wasn´t going to listen to your complaints about it either.
Staring out the window you let your mind go back to the moment where Jack accused you of killing his girlfriend before shooting himself. Was there any sign that could have indicated he was going to kill himself if things didn´t go his way? Was there anything you could have done to prevent it?
Every question you asked of yourself the answer was no, you did what you could in that given situation but you still couldn’t help but feel guilty about it. You felt suddenly so very tired, wanting nothing more than a hot bath and go to sleep. A sigh escaping you earned a glance from Lucas.
“You´re alright?” his deep smooth voice startled you and straightening yourself you turned to look at him.
“Yeah, just tired,” you hummed settling in your seat staring ahead watching the lines passing you swiftly.
“That´s understandable, you can have a shower and go to sleep when we get there. I´m gonna go through some paperwork before going to sleep myself, we can talk about what I told you earlier in the morning,” Lucas offered a warm smile.
“Sounds good,” you yawned hearing Lucas chuckled as he turned his attention back to the road.
Lucas parked the car in his parking space shutting down the engine while unbuckling his seatbelt you doing the same. Stepping out of the car Lucas took your bag ushering you to follow him inside. In the elevator, you two kept quiet as if neither of you knew how to start any small talk but Lucas figured it wasn´t necessary at this point. You had plenty of talk about in the morning.
Stepping out of the elevator, Lucas guided you through the corridor in front of his apartment´s door, unlocking it he allowed you to walk through the doorway first before entering himself, switching on the lights.
“It looks rather cozy,” you sounded surprised as you looked around. The living room was spacy, with one huge black couch, two armchairs, dark wood coffee table, and a big tv.
Staircase to the second floor lured you to take a peek but you managed to stay put waiting for Lucas to show you your room.
“You sound surprised, what did you expect to find?” Lucas chuckled taking off his jacket before walking in the living room handing you the bag.
“I don´t know…typical mancave perhaps,” you mused earning amused headshake from the man as a chuckle escaped from him.
“Sorry to disappoint you,” he smiled.
“Your room is upstairs, follow me,” he continued climbing the stairs you not far behind.
Opening the door he let you in the quest room. It had light grey walls, one big bed, desk, bookshelves two seated couch and entry to a private bathroom.
“Make yourself home, I´ll cook something for supper,” Lucas smiled watching you stepping in the room setting your bag onto the bed glancing around the room.
“Alright, I`ll take a shower in the meanwhile,” you hummed seeing Lucas nod and closing the door behind him leaving you alone.
Sighing heavily while flopping onto the bed you stared at the ceiling feeling lost, confused. Lucas loved you? You couldn´t determine if it was a good thing, something you had wished to hear as you had feelings for him and now it seemed he returned those feelings after all.
It formed butterflies in your stomach but at the same time, it terrified you. What if it wouldn´t work? You worked at the same workplace, he was your superior. And you couldn´t forget, Sarah was still in the picture, as you tried to hunt her down.
Groaning you lied down on your back hiding your face under your arm. You thought about this way too complicated. Deciding to wait until morning you huffed lifting yourself up and headed to a hot shower.