Birdie Babble

the novelty of having a pet will never wear off on me i’ve had animals my entire life for 23 entire years and i still sometimes stop and go holy fuck there is just a little guy in my house

I joke about being mean and evil but then people are Actually just genuinely shitty and I’m like. Doesn’t it make you feel bad when you act like that

Just want everyone to know when I say ‘evil’ I really just mean “villainous and campy like a cartoon antagonist”

So many times the mean girl in movies would put on a fun performance with singing and dancing and lights just to lose to the boring main character who just stood there and sang a slow song it’s twisted it’s sick

How dare you leave this Jason Todd discourse in the tags.

Stuck.

OH GOD ITS ME RN

Other people do this? Oh…

hannibal lecter does the typical “are you a danger to yourself or others?” therapist thing but if they say yes he’s like nice.

“are you a danger to yourself or others?“

“no”

“would you like to be”

The way this app is so intimate but so isolating the only thing i can compare it to is like we’re all in a museum at the same time. Or eating in our cars in a mcdonalds parking lot

no you dont understand, i’m obsessed with him

no you dont understand i’m obsessed with him

ngl, this song slaps way harder than it has any earthly right to

i love people who are continuously surprised that there aren’t men kissing in marvel

Kon for years: I have a crush on Tim but he's straight 😔

Tim after Urban Legends: hey Kon meet my new boyfriend

Kon:

Kon: your fucking WHAT

Tim: my boyfriend bernard

Kon:

Tim: Kon, are you... homophobic?

“I wish my favorite characters would go to therapy 😭 😭 😭” well I don’t! I’m having fun. I hope they kill even more people

i think my ideal job is being paid 50$/hour to sit on the computer doing whatever i want at an empty rented office space for mysterious employers definitely running some kind of money laundering scheme and just needing me to keep up appearances of one of their shell companies but im not like, in on anything and no one can charge me for anything

I'd be the perfect front for your shady company. I always look baffled, I'll never be able to pick you out of a line up, and odds are good I'll forget your name ten minutes after you tell it to me.

rb this and tell me the piece of media, art, literature, music, etc. that you feel was the turning point in the development of your personality

my gender is picking “woman” on a form but feeling kinda weird about it

college is so STUPID why can’t i go 5 times and major in 10 different things for $999 total and then do like, 3 MFAs on the house