Callie tries to start dating, and the boys are not on board with it. DATE comes to the house to pick her up, and she runs upstairs to grab a sweater or something.

Silver: I could throw you across the room with my mind.

Eclipse: I could break your arm and beat you with it.

Silver: I could make your brain explode.

Eclipse: I could eat you.

Silver: *lifts everything in the room with his telekinesis*

Eclipse: *reaches up and yanks a tooth out of his head, staring DATE dead in the eye*

Callie comes back down to the slam of her front door.

Callie: Where's DATE?

The boys shrug.

Silver: Guess they changed their mind. Seemed like a real jerk.

Eclipse: They offered us drugs.

Callie: 🤨

please please please please reblog if you’re a writer and have at some point felt like your writing is getting worse. I need to know if I’m the only one who’s struggling with these thoughts

What can I say? I’m a vampire! 🤭

jonathan harker on may 12th: i witnessed with abject terror as the count descended the sheer stone wall of the castle face first as a lizard would. the unmitigated horror of the spectacle haunts my waking hours like an inescapable nightmare. this man or this thing shall surely be my undoing.

jonathan harker on may 15th: saw the old bastard do the crawling trick again and honestly fuck him it's not even that impressive i don't even care anymore i hope he falls.

Listen I don't believe in omens but I opened the window first thing this morning to see a crow flying off with a screaming sparrow in its beak and I don't think I need to go outside too badly at all today.

Check my Patreon out if you’d like to support the comic, even a little bit helps. Or just to check out the reward tiers, there’s some neat bonus stuff and I tried to make them fun: https://www.patreon.com/waitingforthet

Another example of how statistics are the Devil, and one must always be vigilant as to whether a claim of averages is referring to mean, median, or mode.

This tiny Tawny Frogmouth chick arrived at the Wildlife Hospital at only a few days old and needed some expert care to prepare for adulthood without his parents.

Source

More

Dinosaurs went and got like that

^w^

That’s not a bird. That is a Muppet.

@scavenger-toll

Day 2 in the Middle School Time Loop: you remember that last time, everyone ignored you at recess because they were talking about a TV show that you hadn’t watched. This time, you lie and say you’ve seen it. They ask you who your favorite character is, and you don’t know any of the characters, and so you’re tongue-tied. They think you’re weirder than ever, or maybe a liar, which is worse (and true).

Day 3 in the Middle School Time Loop: you tell your parents that you feel ill. They let you stay home while they’re at work. You spend the whole day watching past episodes of the TV Show.

Day 4 in the Middle School Time Loop: Recess again. The same person asks you who your favorite character is. This time, you're ready. You eagerly tell them, and supplement your reasons for liking them with solid evidence from all 4 seasons of the show. But! Tough luck: you’re now too invested. The atmosphere turns uncomfortable. They go back to ignoring you like they did on the Day 1 that you didn’t know was Day 1.

Day 5 in the Middle School Time Loop:

A short fic based on this post because it’s been consuming my brain

[883 words]

Stolen Opportunity

So this is kind of a continuation of Signing Off. Inspired by an idea @quazart had, where Wade dies during an attack from some big bad, and Knuckles had a hard time dealing with it. Naturally I want to torture explore how Callie would deal with the death of Wade, so here we are.

For the sake of simplicity, she does not have Silver or Eclipse in this verse.

~~~

Callie stared at the larger envelope nestled in with her credit card bills and junk mail as she kicked the front door closed with her foot. It was one of those thick manilla-ish ones, with the cushioning inside. The words “DO NOT BEND” were stamped in red ink on the front, right between her address and the stamp. Her eyes moved to the return address, even though they didn’t need to. She recognized the handwriting.

It was from Wade. Sent two days before he died, if the postmark was anything to go by.

Why had it taken over a week to get to her? Green Hills wasn’t exactly a huge metropolis, it shouldn’t have taken so long.

She shook her head. Didn’t matter. It’s not like Wade would have complained to the post office had he known. That’s just not the guy he was. He didn’t complain, even when he should. Always tried to see the good in others. Tried to be friends with everyone.

Even those who were closed off. And had been for years. Who thought they didn’t need anyone, were fine in their self-isolation. Who was sure, 100% positive she didn’t want any friends.

Somehow, he’d managed to get her walls down. And they’d become friends. Best friends, even.

And now he was gone.

Wouldn't it be entirely possible, even likely, that with all the silly weaknesses vampires and stuff were supposed to have, they'd also turn out to be weak to any number of things that have only been invented more recently? Like who's to say vampires aren't also repelled by the smell of play-doh or driven insane by MIDI music? We've invented so much shit in just the last century there'd be NO predicting this. For all we know they burn to ash if they look at Luigi.

you're going about your normal day when, suddenly, surprise! you've been pokémon mystery dungeon'd!

unfortunately, due to budget cuts, the pokémon assigning quiz has been canceled. instead, you must spin THE WHEEL, assigning you a random, unevolved, non-legendary and non-mythical pokémon. you must now go on some sort of world-saving adventure as this pokémon. good luck!

tell me in the tags what you rolled, and how you feel about it - for bonus points, you can spin the wheel again for (or just take your pick of) a pokémon to be your partner.

bonus rules:

Jon he's really trying here cut him a break

(tumblr crunched the resolution of this comic a lot rip)

My one question is where exactly Dracula is getting the food he’s giving Jonathan. Is he just sprinting to a local village for grocery shopping whenever Jonathan isn’t looking because that would be hilarious

Heartbreaking: This person is making great points but they're being a huge fucking asshole about it so you can't reblog any of it

Heartbreaking: This person is making great points but they're saying you're a bad person if you don't reblog so you can't reblog any of it