March 27th is officially recognized as NATIONAL JOE DAY. This is real and legitimate. And Joe follows the National Day Calendar, so you bet your precious bum heโs celebrating. He may even actually drink caffeine. Who knows, he gets real wild on March 27th.ย
open rp
โI used to stress myself out trying to pretend I was straight and cover up the gay, but...โ
He sighs, almost like heโs a little exhausted.
โNow I worry that Iโm not gay enough! I went out the other night to some---some gay bar, and I couldnโt even understand some of them. Like they were speaking a different language. What is face cracked?โ
open rp
Gently, Joe presses the ice under his eye, where a bruise is quickly darkening over the swelling skin.
โI mean, she was on drugs, but she was still a lady,โ he explains, and then frowns.ย โI wasnโt going to hit a lady.โ
He shifts the pack so the soothing coldness can touch the bridge of his nose, too.
โI only asked if she needed help. I didnโt know she was a maniac until after.โ
Maybe some Open RPs will get my blog going again.
Divorced. Gee, that word is daunting. On the one hand (a very weak hand, one that only waves and punches around when heโs drunk or feeling especially low) it sounds probably like the most logical solution to all his problems, and maybe the nicest thing he could ever do for Lisa. But on the other hand, it seems like the worst thing he could do to her, and his family, and his life.
Then again, what life? It really seems like heโs just in the passenger seat while someone else drives his existence, and not in a Jesus-take-the-wheelย way. More like heโs just letting things happen, and canโt bring himself to care about the outcome.ย
His sexuality comes into question (nothing new) and Joeโs brows shoot up.
โAsexual? I---I, well, no---not---โ he clears his throat,ย โ---Iโm not asexual. Iโm plenty interested in using my---dick, just, not for any of that.โ
Joe purses his lips, and mulls over his own words; he sounds confusing. He doesnโt want to use his dick for his wife?... Where does that lead the mind?
Gosh, this fellow already knows heโs a porn star. And what are the chances heโll ever see him again?
โIโm homosexual. Like, secretly, you know? Very religious family, very religious background. They would act like I bear the mark of the beast, if they knew.โ
So since I disappeared for so long just now and I have just had a few changes and BLAHs happen in my life recently, Iโm kind of going to restart as far as threads go? Most of them.ย
Here I am, once again. Iโm torn into pieces. Canโt deny it, canโt pretend. Just thought you were the blog.
No, but I am still here, after that lull in activity. Iโm still here and I still love Joe and I still have muse.ย
Joe doesnโt realize it at first, but heโs been chewing the heck out of his lips since Kevin really hit the nail on the head, picking out his companionโs fear of acknowledging their Creator might not exist.ย He feels more naked than heโs ever been in his life, more vulnerable and exposed and torn open than heโs ever even tried to be.ย
Thatโs what Kevin sees when he looks at Joe? It has to be what heโs seen over time, because even if heโs insecure about how he comes off, Joe knows thereโs no way heโs that transparent in every day life.ย
His gaze drops, and his jaw goes a little slack. Without looking at it, he reaches for the bill to slide it closer to himself.ย
โGee...sure...โ he mumbles, one hand resting idly on the bill while he grabs his wallet with the other.ย
Part of him is horrified to hear things he hadnโt even processed fully in his own head before. The other part is tickled that his companion would be so raw and honest, and that he seems to know Joe better than he knows himself.ย
Mostly horrified, though. Because hearing all that out loud makes it sound ridiculous. Like he really thinks heโll just be straight again when he gets back home? He sounds like an idiot. Maybe he is one.ย
Maybe itโll be a few days before he can call Lisa again.ย
The bill is paid and Joe remains stuck in his thoughts another moment or two, and stuck in his seat. Finally, after he scrubs a hand over his face, he rests his elbows on the table and looks at Kevin with his chin in his hand.ย
โAm I a total dummy? The guy you just described sounds clueless.โ
He looks down at the table, like the answer is written there.
โHowโd you do that? How---howโd you---โ
His voice goes out for a moment, and he canโt find the words.
โ---just---gosh.โ He raises his eyes back to look at him.ย โShould I be losing sleep over...us? Is that what youโre saying? Do you want me to stress about it? And---and Iโll never---never be---โ he lowers his voice,ย โ---straight, youโre right. You just---gosh---you just---you just kind of blew up my whole little world, there.โ
He covers his face.ย
โNow what?โ
Joe hides his face behind his hand momentarily; the crude gesture, Kevinโs full-mouthed wheezing, and the fact he essentially just pointed out how Joe doesnโt appear straight have his thoughts spinning with both embarrassment and admiration.
But---is it just Kevin that can tell heโs not that kind of guy? Itโs only obvious to him because Joe has confessed as much with steamy and sweet kisses, and over-the-pants stuff, and intimate words and loving affection...
Right?
โNo... no offense taken,โ he lies, and lowers his hand to look across the table. โBut cโmon, you donโt have to be vulgar...โ
You know youโre right, he thinks.
Slyly, he shifts his foot under the table to rest it beside Kevinโs, giving it a little nudge. Lisa used to try and play footsie all the time when sheโd come over for dinner. Joe would pretend not to notice, and try to keep his distance, because it made him too nervous. But now, he sees the fun in it. And the comfort.
But, he really wants to shift the focus from Lisa. Isnโt that the whole point of ignoring her call tonight? And heโs really, kind of, sort of extremely anxious about that, and its repercussions. He needs Kevin to talk about something else.
โWhat type of guy do I seem like, huh?โ he asks, brows together, as he pops a piece of sushi in his mouth. He keeps his tone light, and a smile on his face. โTell me, since you seem to know everything.โ
โIโm married to a woman,โ Joe corrects him, eyes widening on the last word.ย โMy high school sweetheart. Heck, my elementary school sweetheart. My family knows her family... Itโs a whole thing. Practically an arranged marriage.โ
He forces himself to stop touching the ring, and clasps his hands with the roll of his eyes. It wasnโt that arranged. He did have a say in it. And he decided to go ahead with it even after knowing the truth about himself. Heโd just really been hoping the truth could be bent, or better yet, changed.
It couldnโt be, though. Everything is still the same, heโs just put himself, Lisa and Kevin in an unimaginably painful position, and everyone is suffering because he wants to seem like heโs doing the right thing. He couldnโt be further from that, though.ย
โMaybe, I guess... I mean, youโre probably right. Itโs selfish that I would think heโs doing it just to irk me. Heโs got his own life and all... But he does know Iโm โkeeping tabsโ, though - I accidentally liked a video a few weeks ago. So, I outed myself with that one. He knows Iโm hate-watching.โ
Though heโs trying to keep his balance and continue cycling straight, Joe glances over long enough to see Kevinโs demeanor lose some of its cheer. He wonders briefly why he always chooses to bring up Lisa when it only ruins his mood... but he figures itโs probably because she pollutes his thoughts, the same way she pollutes Joeโs. He frowns.ย
While last night was especially bothersome, itโs nerve wracking every time she calls. Even if they arenโt in the heat of the moment, and theyโre just tangled on the couch making up investigators or tossing grapes at each othersโ faces to catch in their mouths, the shrill ring of the telephone always kills the mood. Itโs a gross reminder of the real world, a needle prodding at their perfect bubble to burst it wide open.ย Even just the mention of her threatens to take the wind right out of their sails.ย
Itโs not even allowed, technically, so Joe asks himself internally why he answers every time. Why does he build his schedule around her calls? It made sense when he first got there, because talking to her and preserving her feelings were his top priorities.ย
What about Kevinโs feelings? Joe thinks it hurts more to see his companionโs mood plummet than it does to imagine Lisa going to voicemail. Before, he would argue that not answering her call would immediately raise suspicion. But now that he thinks about it, heโs never really lied to Lisa before... why wouldnโt she believe some excuse about why he missed her call?ย
And it wonโt be nearly as scary as lying to the Mission President. He doesnโt have to look anyone in the eyes or worry about his body language giving him away. Whatโs the worst that could happen?...
โLetโs not worry about that today,โ he says after a moment, watching the road so maybe Elder Price wonโt see the little bit of anxiety on his face as he consciously makes the decision to ignore Lisa for the night.ย โI mean... maybe our meeting ran over. Or we had to switch times. Or the phone broke. I donโt know...โ
Speeding up, Joe starts toward their sushi spot.ย
โCโmon, slowpoke!โ
Before he rounds the corner, he glances to see Kevinโs expression, and it makes him smile. He just has to put Lisa out of his mind for now, and focus on him. Everything will be alright, if he just focuses on Kevin.
Joeโs big smile remains, and he shakes his head back at him.
โYou donโt have to---to notย be a prude!โ he assures him.ย โListen, Iโm a prude. Iโm a Latter-Day Saint! You know---a Mormon?โ
That could have been enough of a sufficient answer, but Joe has even more proof of his sexually-puritan ways: he holds up his hand to show off his wedding ring.
โIโm married---and I donโt even sleep with my wife.โ
He keeps his eyes on the ring---the lie---on his finger, twiddling it a little as he speaks. That sentence sounds a lot worse out loud than it did in his head. It makes him sound---totallyย gay. Or maybe just like a weirdo... but in his paranoia, he quickly changes the subject. Kind of.
โโCause---you know, you donโt have to use your own penis. Thatโs my trick of the trade. Itโs someone else doing all the dirty work!โ
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย โ โ ย I know what Heavenly Father wants from me now.โ ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย guidelines || ย ย ย about || ย ย headcanon ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย independent & semi-selective Elder Price from The Book of Mormon
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย est. nov 2015
Send โ for a HEALTH headcanon. Send โ for a CHILDHOOD headcanon. Send โฟ for a HAPPINESS headcanon. Send โ for an ANGER headcanon. Send โ for a BODY headcanon. Send ฯก for a MENTAL STATE headcanon. Send แฆ for a LOVE/SEXUALITY headcanon. Send โ for a RELIGION headcanon. Send โ for a PET PEEVE headcanon. Send โ for a FOOD headcanon.
Joe tried to watch The Notebook with Lisa about seven times. He fell asleep each and every go, and he still doesn't know how it ends. Lisa never noticed.
โLob...botomize?โ
In his haze, Joe remembers a joke his bishop used to tell, and his panic begins to quell. He doesnโt even have enough awareness to notice/be horrified by the fact Saint is using his feet to hold Joeโs shoulders down, and he hates feet.
โHey---โ he starts, and a tiny smile tugs at the corner of his lips.ย โYou know, Iโd---Iโd rather have ab---a bottle in front of me...โ ---his smile grows wider---ย โ...than a frontal lobotomy.โ
His eyes watch closely for a reaction.
โGet it?โ
And his expression falls once more.
โNow, can...can you, um, be done...?...โ His words are so slow, it even bothers him. โโCause Iโll tell you somethinโ about my parents, guy---they would hateย this. You on---on top of me like... this. Itโs mmmmvery homone---hormone---homo--neurotic---homoerotic. Theyโre very Mormon.โ
Even though itโs finally over and Joe doesnโt have to grasp his knee to keep it from bouncing in front of their mission president, it isnโt until he feels the comfort of Elder Priceโs arm around him that he finally takes an easy breath of fresh air. His shoulders visibly relax, his smile softens, and he glances behind him briefly to make sure theyโre physically in the clear before he inconspicuously nuzzles the side of his companionโs head with his own.
โHe asked about Mindy Sanders...โ he answers, with a slight roll of the eyes.ย โI almost confused her story with Mandy Patterson, but then I remembered the whole point of having two easily confused names.โ
It had been on purpose, because who would lie and make up two people with such similar names? It was so obvious it was clever. Theyโd concocted the two women together, then made up a whole story about how they had trouble telling their names apart.
โPatterson---patty-cake---children. Mandy has a baby (out of wedlock--but she can be forgiven!) and Mindy is a teenage lifeguard. Sanders---sandy---beach---water. So, Mandy has the baby and Mindy is the lifeguard.โ
The mission president had gotten a real kick out of it and even shared an anecdote about his missionary days and how he had three investigators named Bill, Will and Gil. Joe might have laughed a little too hard at it, since he was so relieved that their lie went undetected.
โBut donโt worry, alright? Iโm plenty capable of keeping our cover, Elder. I went to school for this, yโknow. Sort of...โ
As he pulls his bike from the rack outside, his forehead creases and he lowers his voice.
โI mean, I didnโt think Iโd use my degree to lie to my mission president, but, hey, life throws you lots of curves, right?โ
As they start down the street, Joe swerves to ride a little closer to his companion.
โI assume everything went peachy keen with you, huh?โ