I’m Here (A Solavellan Fic)

[This is for the lovely @solverne. My dear friend and Kohai. <3 I really hope you like it. I’m sorry if it is bad. ;~;]

The journey back from Adamant Fortress was long and eerily silent. The Nightmare had truly rattled everyone by exposing their deepest fears and making them vulnerable. Avarae glanced ahead of the group at Ena. She was truly concerned for her friend. She knew that she had to make the choice of leaving the Warden behind.

Avarae knew Ena well. The choice was not an easy one and it was surely eating at her, but she knew to give her space. Night was drawing near and everyone was exhausted. Avarae would leave the discussion for tomorrow. The experience in the Fade was something everyone would rather leave behind for tonight.

Even Solas was rather quiet on the journey back to Skyhold. She glanced over at her lover, eyes softening when she gazed at him. Without a word, she grabbed his hand and intertwined their fingers. Solas was slightly startled by her sudden action but a small smile appeared upon his lips, squeezing her hand gently.

It was a silent communication between the pair of Elvhen. A quiet reminder that they were there for one another. When the party finally reached the gates of Skyhold, they entered the fortress hand in hand.

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Solas and Avarae decided to retire early in the evening. The experience left them both rather drained. They prepared for bed in a comfortable silence. Just being in each other's prescence was enough for them. Both of them climbed into bed and settled under the warm blankets. Avarae settled on her side with her back against Solas' chest as he wrapped his arms around her.

Solas buried his face within her dark locks, inhaling softly. He soon found himself drifting away into the Fade. Avarae felt her eyelids growing heavy from exhaustion as she listened to Solas' soft breaths as he slept. It didn't take long for her to slip into a peaceful slumber to join her lover in the Fade.

Slipping into the Fade was as natural as breathing for Avarae, she found herself standing within a peaceful grove. It was such a better improvement from Adamant. It was so calm and serene. Avarae felt herself already beginning to relax. She glanced up at the sky, taking in the beauty around her. She could hear the birds singing softly and smell the scent of spring as a small breeze caressed her face.

She looked around for Solas and found that he wasn't there. She furrowed her brows in confusion. It was strange for them not to have found one another by now. She couldn't even feel his aura. Something was wrong. Very wrong.

"Solas?" She called out. The only reponse she recieved was an eerie silence. She felt her chest begin to tighten and fear began to set it. Where was Solas? And where was she? Avarae decided to start searching for him. She knew she needed to stay calm. She didn't want to attract demons. She took a deep breath and set out to look for him by heading deeper within the grove.

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As Avarae walked deeper and deeper through the grove, the small breeze turned into a violent gushing wind. She lifted her arm to block the wind from her face and continued forward. Suddenly, the sky grew dark and the trees around her began to wilt. Avarae froze. The peaceful grove was rapidly dying. But why?

"Solas!" She called out for him. Her voice filled with fear. Still there was only silence. Panic began to consume her and she began to run. She ran and ran for what seemed like hours, but she was going nowhere. Avarae desperately wanted to wake up, but why couldn't she? What was keeping her here?

"Solas! Sathan! Answer me, vhenan!" She cried out again. The eerie silence was maddening. It was almost as if she was in the Void. Her heart was pounding. She felt as if she couldn't breathe. "Someone! Answer me!" She screamed into the decaying dreamscape.

"Mamae?" A soft voice cut through the silence like a sharp blade. Avarae felt like she was consumed by ice. 'That voice....No....It couldn't be...' She thought as she slowly turned in the direction that the voice came from. Her eyes widened. "Da'vhenan...?" Her voice trembled slightly. How she longed to see her daughter again.

"Mamae...You left us. Why did you leave?" Estelar tilted her head slightly as she stared at her. Avarae could feel her heart breaking within her chest. "I didn't leave, da'vhenan. I tried to save you." She stepped towards her daughter, reaching out to her. Estelar stepped away from her. "You left! You left me and Papae!"

Avarae could feel the hot tears cascade down her cheeks at her daughter's words. Before she could speak, Rienmar appeared beside his daughter and lifted her into his arms. His eyes looked at Avarae with such despair before averting his gaze. Avarae felt herself shatter all over again at her family's rejection. "Sathan...Listen to me..." She reached out to them again.

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The Fade began to twist around them. Rienmar and Estelar stared back at her with lifeless eyes. Avarae could see the arrow in Estelar's back and the blood drenching Rienmar's side. A tremble ran through her body. A sob escaped her lips. "No....Sathan...Venavis...." She shut her eyes tightly, trying to make the image disappear.

She could hear their voices in unison. "You left us. We died because of you." Avarae screamed and placed her hands over her ears, falling to her knees.  "Sathan! Venavis!" She repeated over and over until silence fell around her.

When the voices finally stopped, she removed her hands from her ears and slowly opened her eyes. There was Solas standing before her with his hand offered to her. Avarae took his hand just like she did that dreadful day. He gave her hope and freedom. Suddenly, everything went dark.

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Avarae's eyes snapped open to Solas above her with his hands on her shoulders. Her cheeks were dampened with tears. "Solas..." Her voice sounded so small and so weak. His icy eyes stared down at her with worry and fear. "I tried to find you in the Fade, but a demon was interferring. A very powerful demon of Despair was blocking my connection to you."

Solas moved away slightly so Avarae could have room to sit up. "I couldn't wake you..." His voice shook slightly. He moved a hand to her cheek, caressing her skin gently with his thumb. Avarae felt the tears begin to stream down her face. "It's my fault...It's my fault they are gone..." She sobbed.

Solas' eyes saddened at her tears. He brushed away her tears with his thumb. "It's not your fault, vhenan. You tried to save them. You were outnumbered." He tried to console her with his words. He hated to see Avarae cry. She had lost so much. To see her blame herself for a situation she couldn't control made his heart ache.

"I always lose the ones I love...It's only a matter of time I lose you too..." Her voice cracked. Solas pulled her into a tight embrace, burying his face within her hair. "You'll never lose me, vhenan. I'm here. I will always stay by your side." Avarae wrapped her arms around him and held onto him desperately like he would disappear if she let go.

She buried her face in the crook of his neck. They held each other for what seemed like hours, not wanting to let go. Moments passed before they pulled away to look into one another's eyes, getting lost within their depths. "Ar lath ma, vhenan. I'm here." He assured her softly as he leaned in to capture her lips.

Avarae returned the kiss gently. Her eyes slipped close as she got lost within his kiss. As long as she was by Solas' side, she would never be alone. She felt so safe and secure by his side. She knew there was no place she would rather be.

Relax, Vhenan (A Solavellan Fic)

[To the lovely @buttsonthebeach as a belated birthday gift. Happy belated birthday, dear. <3]

The ball at the Winter Palace was soon and preparing for it was an absolute nightmare. Etiquette lessons, dance lessons, what to say and what not to say to nobles, presentation, fashion, and more pointless details that Ellana was tired of dealing with. She thought she would never get away from Leliana and Josephine. They were constantly drilling the rules of the Game into her head.

Ellana groaned softly, rubbing the tense muscles at the back of her neck. All she wanted to do was settle into bed and sleep to rid herself of the nagging headache at her temples. She understood why the ball was so important but the amount of lessons and preparations were overwhelming. The walk to her quarters seemed to take an eternity. Her legs felt heavy as she made her way up the stairs.

She made a sound of content when she finally reached her and entered her room. She froze in place when she spotted Solas sitting upon the couch with his legs crossed and a tome in hand. "Solas...What are you doing here?" She inquired curiously. It was rare for Solas to be in her quarters before her.

His icy eyes glanced up from the tome, snapping it shut with one hand. "You have been so busy with the ball preparations that I have rarely seen you. I have missed your company, vhenan." With that, he stood and sauntered over to her. The warmth in his words made her heart skip a beat.

"Ir abelas, Solas. I don't mean to be absent, but Leliana and Josephine find it crucial that I know everything there is to know about the Game." She groaned slightly. The mere mention of the Game irritated her. He hummed in response, reaching out to place a hand upon her cheek. "I know it is tiring, but they are correct. I just wish you didn't have to learn everything in such a short time." He caressed her skin with his thumb.

Ellana leaned into his touch. "It has been quite stressful, but I know they just want me prepared." Solas simply nodded. He could tell that she was under a lot of stress. He could see the exahaustion in her eyes and how tense her muscles were.

Solas moved his hand from her cheek to take her hand. "Come. Sit down and relax." He lead her over to the couch to sit down. Ellana settled down on the couch, leaning back against the cushions. Solas moved to stand behind the couch. Ellana raised an eyebrow curiously. He placed his hands upon her shoulders and lightly squeezed them.

Ellana let out a small gasp. Her shoulders were incredibly tight. Solas furrowed his brows. "Your shoulders are very tense, vhenan. Let me massage them for you." Ellana relaxed against the couch and made a soft sound of approval when he squeezed her shoulders again. "That sounds wonderful."

Solas smiled. "Remove your jacket for me, ma lath." Ellana nodded slightly and began unbuttoning the many buttons of her jacket. As soon as she removed it, she shrugged it off and tossed it aside. She was left in her thin tunic, exposing more of her soft brown skin. Solas couldn't help but eye her slender form. She was beautiful.

Ellana was soon seated once more. Solas placed his hands upon her shoulders once more, squeezing a bit harder and kneading her tight muscles. Her eyes fluttered close and she leaned into his touch. It seemed that the Fade was no his only area of expertise. She couldn't stop the soft moan that escaped her lips as his hands worked out the tightness of her muscles.

He chuckled lowly and leaned down to speak softly in her ear. "Feel good, vhenan?" His lips slightly brushed her ear causing a slight shiver to travel down her spine. "Yes..." She spoke rather breathlessly. He straightened up and continued to work the knots from her shoulders. Ellana sometimes pushed herself too hard. It was a concern of Solas'.

He soon began to massage her neck. He applied the right amount of pressure at the base of her skull. She moaned softly at the feeling. Her neck had been bothering her all day causing her to have a throbbing headache. The corners of his lips curved up into a pleased smile. He used his mana to warm his hands as he thoroughly massaged her neck and shoulders.

Ellana could feel the tension practially melting away with his touch. She could feel her eyelids growing heavy. He could tell that she was much more relaxed. Solas moved from behind the couch and took a seat next to her. "Feeling much better, vhenan?" He leaned into press a small kiss to her hair. She gave him a sleepy smile before laying her head against his shoulder.

"Yes. Ma serannas, ma lath." She murmured softly. Solas chuckled softly, wrapping an arm around her. "I'm glad to be of assistance." He pressed a small kiss to her forehead. "Hamin...." He whispered softly as he held her. Ellana drifted away into a peaceful slumber with her head resting upon his shoulder.

Warmth (A Solavellan Fic)

[For the lovely @lavilsa as a belated birthday gift. Happy belated birthday. <3]

Cold. That was just one of the words to describe the vast snowy land that was Emprise Du Lion. Miera and her companions seemed to have been trekking through the thick snow for what felt like days. The party offered their aid to the devestated town of Sahrnia. There was so much to be done.

They turned their focus on capturing Suledin Keep. It was a large enough structure to maintain a foothold in the area. It would be vital to their mission, but yet it was a lengthy trek through the treacherous environment of Red Lyrium and groups of Red Templars. From sealing Rifts to taking back small camps, the group grew weary.

The cold and exhaustion were setting in. A shiver wracked Miera's body. The frosty air bit at her exposed flesh. She could feel her hands and feet steadily beginning to numb from the cold. She pulled her cloak tighter as she continued walking. Miera was very determined to cover as much ground as she possibly could for the sun was beginning to set.

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Dorian groaned loudly. "Fasta vass! It is bloody cold!" He hugged himself as he walked. He glanced over at the Iron Bull, who not in the least seemed to be bothered by the chill. "How can you be trekking around in weather like this wearing barely nothing?" He exclaimed, teeth chattering slightly. The Iron Bull bellowed out a deep laugh. "Qunari are warm natured. We don't get cold easily." All Dorian could do is roll his eyes.

Miera laughed softly at the exchange between her friends. She could tell the exhaustion was setting in. Solas was being unnaturally quiet, Dorian was quite irritable, and Bull wasn't making as much lewd commentary as usual. She decided it would be best to stop and make camp for the night. "I think it would be a good time to set up camp. We are clearly cold and exhausted."

Everyone was in agreement and began to unpack the essentials for setting up camp. It didn't take them long. The group of four were quite eager to settle down by a nice fire with a hot meal before retiring to their bedrolls. The party worked together to set up camp and finally got dinner started.

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Miera and her companions sat closely around the fire as they enjoyed their much needed meal. Dorian glanced up at the starry night sky, wrapping his cloak around him tightly. "By the Maker...I will be so glad when we finally leave this awful place. I can barely feel my toes or anything else for that matter." The Iron Bull couldn't resist but lean in closely. "I can think of a way to warm you up." Dorian smacked his shoulder and huffed. "Shut it. You always have your mind elsewhere."

Bull simply laughed. "Well you know where to find me." The qunari stood up and glanced over at Miera and Solas. "See you in the morning, boss. Solas." He nodded his head to the unusually silent apostate."Goodnight, Iron Bull." Miera bid the qunari goodnight as well before glancing over at Solas. Dorian soon followed after the Iron Bull, leaving the two elves alone by the fire.

At that moment a slight breeze blew through their small camp causing Miera to pull her cloak even tighter around her. Her shoulders trembled slightly. Without a word, Solas wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her against him. She was caught by surprise. Her clear blue eyes glanced up at him curiously. "Vhenan....You have been unusually quiet today. Is everything alright?" She spoke softly.

Solas gazed at her, expression softening when he could see the concern she had for him. "It's been a long day, Vhenan. I'm quite exhausted. No need to be concerned." He used his other hand to brush the blonde locks from her face, tucking them gently behind her pointed ear. She gave him a small smile before laying her head upon his shoulder.

Solas held her tightly as if he was protecting her from the world around them. He hated omitting the truth from her. It would be so easy to tell her everything. He had much on his mind today. They were getting close to the end. After they returned from Emprise Du Lion, it wouldn't be long before they readied their troop for the Arbor Wilds.

His mind had been plagued with thoughts of telling her the whole truth about himself. The what ifs and the what nots. Would she accept him? Would she call him a traitor and push him away? He closed his eyes and tightened his arms around her. He didn't want to lose her, but in the back of his mind he knew he may have to let her go.

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Moments passed between the two elves before Miera broke the comfortable silence. "Solas...." She peered up at him once more. He returned her gaze, giving her a small smile. "Yes?" He answered with such tenderness. "We should get some rest. We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow." Miera took his hand within her own, intertwining their fingers.

Solas hummed in response, giving her hand a light squeeze. "Indeed." He stood, gently pulling her along with him. He waved his hand towards the fire and used his mana to dwindle it to nothing but a small flame. She tugged his hand gently to lead him towards the tent.

When the pair got inside, they dressed down to simple tunics and leggings and pushed their bedrolls together. The two elves soon settled into their bedroll under a thick fur blanket, tangling themselves within each other's arms. They laid there facing one another. Solas reached out to caress her cheek lovingly. "Ar lath ma. Never forget that." His voice was barely a whisper.

Miera leaned into his touch, turning her head to lightly kiss his palm. "Ar lath ma." She repeated. Solas leaned in to capture her lips in a loving chaste kiss. At that moment, it seemed like nothing else mattered in the world, but them. They lost themselves in one another's kiss. Solas slowly pulled away to place a soft peck upon her forehead before pressing his own against hers.

They felt so warm and content within each other's embrace. It didn't take long for the exhaustion to consume them. "On nydha, ma vhenan." Solas murmured softly before placing one last kiss to her forehead. "On nydha, ma lath." Miera could feel her eyelids grow heavy. The pair soon drifted into the Fade wrapped in each other's arms.

I did it guys...I found the Solasmancer theme song...

I feel it everyday, it's all the same It brings me down, but I'm the one to blame I've tried everything to get away So here I go again Chasing you down again Why do I do this? Over and over, over and over I fall for you Over and over, over and over I try not toIt feels like everyday stays the same It's dragging me down, and I can't pull away So here I go again Chasing you down again Why do I do this? Over and over, over and over I fall for you Over and over, over and over I try not to Over and over, over and over You make me fall for you Over and over, over and over You don't even try So many thoughts that I can't get out of my head I try to live without you Every time I do, I feel dead I know what's best for me But I want you instead I'll keep on wasting all my time Over and over, over and over I fall for you Over and over, over and over I try not to Over and over, over and over You make me fall for you Over and over, over and over You don't even try to

I found the Solasmancers theme song. It also fits Solas trying to resist Lavellan but always ends up falling in love with her.

Over and Over by Three Days Grace.

The Irony

I have a friend that is really into spiritual readings, past life/tarot card readings, and believes in spiritual guardians/spirit animals/spiritual Zodiacs. Well one day she decided to do some of her readings on me. I'm really fascinated and intrigued by these things, so I was thrilled. This friend isn't into Dragon Age at all and she came to the conclusion that my spirit guardian is the moon, my spirit animal is the wolf, and my spiritual zodiac is the deer. So I'm both the Wolf and the Halla. Ah the irony.

Every time I see Solas in that Golden Armor in Trespasser:

Is there possibly a rehab for Solas addiction? *has romanced him 18 times*