Random Reblogs and MtG

S.686 - RESTRICT Act

I’m just so fucking pissed off man if they can surgically airstrike international volunteer food workers three consecutive times to ensure their operation is wiped out completely what the fuck is left for anyone to say

kill one group of aid workers with explicit intent so that all other potential or currently operating aid organizations pull out of the region to ensure gaza starves with no one willing to risk helping her people. deep sickness

Let it be known that the world would rather watch as the zionist occupation wipes out my people systematically, industrially, daily, than to take the offensive and end it before it's too late, and it's already too late. No, what's most important to them is pretending bureaucracy is real and not a façade for Western war criminals to keep doing what they want as long as they want.

Frankly, the biggest reason nobody can figure out how to make a Duke Nukem reboot work is because they think the 90s edgelord bullshit is the main reason that Duke Nukem 3D was such a breakout hit, when the truth of the matter is that it succeeded at least partly in spite of that. Duke Nukem 3D legitimately pushed the envelope in terms of what it was possible for a first-person shooter to be – in many ways it's just as foundational to the genre in its modern form as Wolfenstein 3D or Doom. You can't recapture that with dick jokes, and if you're not willing to take risks in terms of basic game design, dick jokes are all you have.

Ultimately, what the franchise really needs to shake off its creative rust is to stop trying to iterate on its established formula and shift genres entirely. To this end, I have a proposal: make the next Duke Nukem game a side-scrolling metroidvania. In this essay

No, the Duke is actually quite keen on double-jumping in principle. Whenever you find a new gadget he's like "come on, double jump, daddy needs that boost", only to be vocally (and vulgarly) disappointed each and every time when it turns out to be some other, more specialised kind of mobility upgrade, complete with unique dialogue about why each non-double-jump upgrade sucks ass.

(The actual much-hyped double jump upgrade is obtained during the post-final-boss escape sequence, less than two minutes before the end of the game, which really sets him off.)

"Horizontal air-dash while facing left" and "horizontal air-dash while facing right" are separate upgrades, with a non-trivial span of gameplay between them. The puzzle design specifically exploits this. You cannot imagine how annoyed the Duke is.

I like to imagine that somewhere in the first area there is some collectible that looks to be easily accessible with a double jump, and Duke complains for a bit about padding gametime by having players backtrack for pointless collectables once they get the double jump. Eventually, he encounters another one of these collectables, similarly just out of reach of a single jump. Duke again gets mad at this, and does bring up the idea of figuring out how to pick up that collectable using your current movement tech, just to spite the developers who clearly want you to backtrack just to hit the "Jump" button twice. This pattern repeats, this particular flavor of collectible appears and would be easily accessible with a double jump, but instead you need to macguyver together your current movement tech to figure out some other way to get to the platform. The exception being the first instance, which sits on a platform in the middle of an otherwise empty room, inaccessible by any means except a double-jump. A ladder at the top of the room dangles the hope that one day you'll access the room from another direction and be able to get the upgrade that way, but you cannot. Finally, during the escape sequence, if you go fast enough, you can return to that room and collect that first collectible. Doing so unlocks the Triple Jump. You've got just enough time to realize that if you triple jump from the platform, you won't QUITE reach the ladder, before the explosion catches up to you and kills you.

You understand my vision.

(The folks in the tags remarking at that this reads like playing a Hollow Knight randomiser with some of the goofier too-clever challenge modes turned on and a bad RNG seed also understand my vision. It's difficult to overstate how much of Duke Nukem 3D's design ethos boils down to committing Fuckery™ upon the first-generation FPS formula.)

And here's a link to the original exposé, published by the Israeli newspaper Haaretz (behind a paywall)

Israel is currently attacking the Al Shifa hospital in northern Gaza (March 18) with tanks and heavy gunfire, resulting in an increasing number of casualties and abductions including journalists who were reportedly severely beaten and taken to an unknown location.

Israel is literally relishing in its impunity. All we have been hearing from those in power is "concerns" and pathetic words of condemnation while Israel continues to boast about its atrocities, six months on.

“THESE fare-dodgers are RUINING the livelihoods of our POOR POOR bus and train drivers” another day another example of news media fuelling class warfare on purpose. literally shut the fuck up!

when will they stop acting like poor people are responsible for the incomes of other working class people? my dude. transport is a human right. food is a human right. dodging fares and stealing food aren’t acts of evil, they’re rational actions given. the economy. come on

this isn’t an accident btw. it is in the best interests of capitalism and capitalist powers to pit the working class against each other. don’t fall for it. if you see someone jumping the train barrier? no you didn’t. if you see someone shoplifting from the supermarket? no you didn’t. solidarity forever

now that this post is getting notes again it is also worth pointing out:

if fare-dodging influences the wages of transportation workers, that is a choice made by the government or whichever company the transport has been outsourced to. it is not “fare dodgers are stealing your wages”, it is “as the government we are choosing to pass our losses onto the workers instead of absorbing them”

if shop-lifting influences the wages of supermarket workers, that is a choice made by the supermarket. it is not “shop-lifters are stealing your wages”, it is “as a multi-billion dollar company we are choosing to pass our losses onto the workers”

other workers. other poor people. anyone other than the government and CEOs and operators of big business… they are not to blame for wage loss or unemployment. doing what you need to do to survive is always morally correct. stop fuelling class warfare

israel has been bombing hospitals, schools, homes, playground areas. they train their soldiers to kill children incase they grow up one day “and fight back”. Palestinians deaths have been made fun of, they’re been constantly mocked.

idk how you can have no sympathy for palestinians. what have they done to deserve this? israel want to erase every evidence of every palestinian. they do not want them to exist, they dont want any “deals” they wont ever stop. not with the US & UK funding their genocide.

it was never about hamas, the hostages, it was always and will forever be about getting rid of every palestinian & their history.

Ignore my bouncing leg, I was born without a tail you see

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Block these sites in your uBlock Origin so you won't see that shit in your searches

The extension in the screenshot is uBlacklist and it's quite easy to use, both manually from the control panel to add the sites with the asterisk, or when in a search results page and clicking the "block this site" option. It's how I've gotten rid of random Pinterest site results, too.

They also provide subscription lists that keep up sites such as these and others on their github:

https://iorate.github.io/ublacklist/subscriptions

IDF: “We are the greatest army in the world.”

But you just shot a sheep and put it on tiktok.

hey i made this small dumb comic about my gay OCs! it was my first time doing one, so i think i learned a lot. i hope you like it! i’ll try to make more comics in the future, especially with these characters.

Nobody better ever fucking tell me the fight for rights is over.

Reminder this is where "no kink at pride" leads. You demand everything be family friendly you'll learn who's families are the standard

i'm glad i saw this post, because we need to talk about this & people need to be aware of what's happening. (sorry for lack of alt/transcript - would appreciate if someone could add one!)

above was posted on terry miller's instagram (@/disappearing_tm). i wouldn't necessarily compare this to "no kink at pride" discourse, because a BAR has no obligation to be family-friendly. children aren't allowed in bars. instead this makes me think of that REALLY old school type of homophobia - the kind talked about in different from the others (1919), or victim (1961) - where "proof" of a man's gay activities, & therefore violation of the law (whether it be laws against homosexuality, sodomy, or "lewd conduct"), is used to intimidate & blackmail him. there is some VERY shady & scary shit going on here, & i urge you (the community) to keep an eye on it.

Wizard RPG that takes the Vancian "spells are demons made of math that live in your brain" thing to its logical yet absurd conclusion and casts the player character's prepared spells as a Disco Elysium style internal peanut gallery that influences dialogue trees and makes fun of your decisions. I want to get relationship advice from magic missile.

YOU - "I don't want to die, no matter how hard I try, I'm so scared of death"

FALSE LIFE - Invest in lichdom IMMEDIATELY.

RAISE DEAD - Invest in lichdom IMMEDIATELY.

ANIMATE DEAD - Invest in lichdom IMMEDIATELY.

CALM EMOTIONS - Hey hey, just breathe okay? I know it's scary, I know... You will be okay. I believe in you, you're strong.

MAGIC JAR - Do I have the offer for you!

DANSE MACABRE - Invest in lichdom IMMEDIATELY

SUMMON UNDEAD - Invest in lichdom IMMEDIATELY.

CATAPULT - Gather 100 arrows and coat them within the poison of a Purple Wyrm, CREATION can help you. 3d8 bludgeoning, 100d8 Piercing, 1200d6 poison on a failed save (Talk to SILVERY BARBS). 368 + 4200 damage on average. We repeat until god is dead.

@spitblaze this is too funny to leave in the tags

Pigeon attempts to court falcon

For all those in the notes - peregrine falcons hunt by dive-bombing their prey; this falcon however is currently stationary and cannot dive-bomb much of anything. In this moment, the pigeon is safe. The falcon however may not recover from the embarrassment.

I can't tell if that's a giant pigeon or a tiny falcon

Tiny falcon

characters whose philosophy is “if i cannot be wanted, i will be needed and if i cannot be needed, let me be used until there’s nothing left of me.” thank you for everyone’s attention. falls off stage and dies