i feel like tumblr will appreciate this
my favorite thing about this post is all the "ea nasir" in the tags. I cannot articulate how hilarious it is to me that there is a well populated "ea nasir" tag on tumblr. PLEASE imagine going back in time and telling a babylonian conman that thousands of years in the future he's going to be spoken about across the entire world using unfathomable technologies on account of how truly shitty his copper was
the police to my mom: ma'am your daughter was driving 110 mph eating hot cheetos with one hand and texting in an imessage group chat titled “boy pussy” with the other and crashed into the back wall of dd’s discounts and died instantly but somehow her body made its way to the accessories section and we found 35 dollars worth of stolen hoop earrings in her purse
Earth is losing to the Aliens. You develop a serum and are now on the body littered streets to face the Alien commander. “Weakling! A super soldier serum is useless on your kind!” He exclaims. “That’s why…I made a zombie virus.” You say as you break the vial, releasing a mist into the air
Summary: The reader is in the thick of it and meets the rest of Dean’s family but she knows Dean’s not telling her everything…
Pairing: Surgeon!Dean x surgeon!reader
Word Count: 2,500ish
Warnings: language, briefly mentioned child abuse, mention of kidnapping/deaths
A/N: Eeek!
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From Everyman Cinema’s twitter.
At Dublin Zoo.
for our grade 12 formal a guy asked me to be his partner and i was like ‘ok’ but he told me to not wear heels because he was like 5’4 and it would make him feel bad and i considered it but then i remembered a few years before he was in my maths class and i was struggling with a maths problem because i had been sick earlier that week and he told me if i paid attention or even showed up to class that i would understand it anyway i wore 5 inch sparkly heels and the only thing he said to me was ‘this is because of grade 9 right?’ and i said that it was and i am glad he knew exactly where he went wrong
yall see “love” and immediately go to “romantic love” if you translate “love is the whole point” to “romantic love is the whole point” you need to rethink everything because love is found in everything. in community, in friendships, in family, in food, in nature so actually love is the whole point and u can die mad about it. hope this helps <3
writing is so fun
i hate writing so much
this is so frustrating
i’m a literal god at writing
Pairing: Escort!Dean x Client!Reader
Summary: After her engagement with her stupid ex crumbled and burst into flames, Y/N tries to get her life back together. She’s fine — or at least she was — until she got her sister’s wedding invitation in the mail. A wedding in which her ex will serve as the groom’s best man. In order to show her past fiancé that she’s totally over him, she needs to show up with a date at the wedding, even if it’s just a pretend relationship with a male escort whom she pays a lot of money for. But pretending is all it is, because she can’t let herself fall for an escort — or can she?
Warnings: Fake/pretend relationship, humor, a little angst, a little fluff, smut, emotional slow burn maybe. Chapters will be warned individually.
Word Count: ~62k
Header and series beta: @winchest09 <3
Pairing: Escort!Dean x Client!Reader
Summary: After her engagement with her stupid ex crumbled and burst into flames, Y/N tries to get her life back together. She’s fine — or at least she was — until she got her sister’s wedding invitation in the mail. A wedding in which her ex will serve as the groom’s best man. In order to show her past fiancé that she’s totally over him, she needs to show up with a date at the wedding, even if it’s just a pretend relationship with a male escort whom she pays a lot of money for. But pretending is all it is, because she can’t let herself fall for an escort — or can she?
Warnings: Fake/pretend relationship, humor, a little angst, a little fluff, smut, emotional slow burn maybe. Chapters will be warned individually.
Word Count: ~62k
Header and series beta: @winchest09 <3
Pairing: Bartender!Dean x Female!Reader
Summary: After a string of troubled ex’s and bad dates, Y/N is frustrated, wanting something with no strings attached for a while. She turns to her best friend Dean and they find themselves in a friends with benefits arrangement. However, Dean has a secret. He’s been in love with Y/N since their high school days and he’s never found the courage to tell her. Could now be his chance or will he end up with his heart broken?
Warnings: Language, Angst… Like, so much angst you guys. This is the angstiest thing I’ve written so far. Smut (Warnings will be marked in detail in individual chapters).
This series is 4 weeks ahead on Patreon. Read from just $2.50!
This series is complete!
Pairing: Escort!Dean x Client!Reader
Summary: After her engagement with her stupid ex crumbled and burst into flames, Y/N tries to get her life back together. She’s fine — or at least she was — until she got her sister’s wedding invitation in the mail. A wedding in which her ex will serve as the groom’s best man. In order to show her past fiancé that she’s totally over him, she needs to show up with a date at the wedding, even if it’s just a pretend relationship with a male escort whom she pays a lot of money for. But pretending is all it is, because she can’t let herself fall for an escort — or can she?
Chapter Warning: There’s still angst… but it will morph into something cute (hopefully)
WC: 3,678
A/N: This is it. This is the end to yet another series of mine. I hope you like it <3
Beta’d by the amazing @winchest09 <3
Support me on Patreon
If you like what I’m writing, please consider leaving me a tip to keep me energized
The wedding has been put off for two hours in order for everyone to be able to cool down. Word has gotten around about what happened and how Y/N has fled outside because she just can’t take the stares and silent pity.
To her astonishment, Tiffany and Arthur had made up rather quickly, but she didn’t expect anything less. Arthur loves her sister and she can feel that Tiffany is genuinely over Mick as well. That’s probably why Tiff had been so weird at her hen party. She remembered her sister telling her that she was a bad person then, to which she wondered why Tiff might have thought that about herself. Now she knows the answer. Yeah, well, she’s clearly not innocent but Y/N has forgiven her already. She’s not the one to hold grudges, but she does know that it’ll take her time to fully forgive. Thankfully, Mick is out of the picture, having been driven off by Arthur. Nobody really knows where he went but she silently hopes that he’ll lay in the next hospital with bruised ribs and a dent in his ego.
Also out of the picture, is Dean. But that’s another story, and probably her own fault.
