@funnyrunner / funnyrunner.tumblr.com
Endurance athlete seeks loving Canadian home. Enjoys trails and outdoor swimming. People friendly, but skittish around red hats. Housebroken and on the verge of heartbroken. Fully vaccinated. Looking for a 4 year/forever home. Comes with mittens and a large repertoire of Bryan Adams songs.
I have been following a structured weight training plan for two months. It was constructed for cyclists and so much tougher than what I’d do on my own. (Read: so many squats and lunges. Read: buns of steel in-progress.) Today I moved up to the next level and I don’t know how these narrow push-ups and high side planks are going to come into play when I’m riding, but I hope not much given how pathetic I am at them.
Come carry me up the stairs now?
Ahem, @runningforbiscuits, @runningwithguts, @danielleruns, @beachyrunner, @chrisontherun, @fitterisbetter, @er1nruns, @two-o-nine and the rest of the crew...where you at?
Soggy shoes. Is there anything more badass than water flying off the front of your shoe with each strike while you pound the pavement in the rain? Bonus: deserted streets.
Recognized my shadow today on the bike. I don’t know if it was the nostalgia of riding one of my favorite training routes or the fact that this was my longest ride since March, but it caught my eye. Oh, there you are. It’s good to see you.
So happy to see some of your beautiful faces on my dash again. If I knew I had these magical summoning powers I would have thrown in Ryan Reynolds and my future husband. Welcome back all! Let’s stick around, OK?
It also sounds like perhaps we are all very much at the same fitness level. I know routes I didn’t bat an eye at have grown hills mountains.
@fitterisbetter suggested perhaps a virtual tumblr trot to keep us pushing and I think it’s a great idea. Maybe a 5K? Or whatever distance you want to challenge yourself.
Or, hear me out on this, a tumblr trotlympics! We all run a 5k and add in some kettle swings, burpees, push-ups, etc. for the CrossFitter crowd. Everyone can throw in their suggestions. It’s not a competition. There would be no ranking. This would just be for funzies.
Excuse me while I google what a kettle swing is...I have a trotlympics to prepare for.
You with me? @beachyrunner‘s with me. @chrisontherunis in. C’mon @er1nruns, @danielleruns, @runningwithguts, @fitterisbetter, @two-o-nine and the rest of the crew.
When covid hit everything went off the rails. Work was bonkers, races were cancelled and my training took a backseat..well, technically it was completely abandoned. It’s time to rebuild. It’s time to get back to basics. This is where I come when it’s time to rally and support each other’s accomplishments - from putting on pants to running 5ks, 10ks, 42ks.
Today I rode my bike and did a some weight training. Now, someone please explain why high side planks are the devil?
So it appears no one has forgotten I promised a race recap and then vanished for years. I will get on that.
To tied you over, I will share my recap for Ironman #3 which I trained for while on hiatus. The story goes:
I started the race with a broken collarbone from a crash a few weeks earlier. One minute into the swim I was punched in the face. This set the tone for the rest of the day. In conclusion, I wouldn't change a thing.
And here’s what my face currently looks like because I’m sure you’ve missed it.
Are we still running the miles and lifting the things?
My training plan starts next week.
Shall we do this?
Ironman Mont-Tremblant laid out a hellacious gauntlet yesterday. I friggin owned that mutha!!! A huge and completely unexpected PR that I still haven’t wrapped my head around.
Recap to come.
Spoiler alert: I PRed my marathon again. I guess I just need to warm my legs up with a 112 mile bike to get the blood flowing.
Last long ride is DONE. The next one will be 112 miles followed by a marathon.
This girl has put in the work. She’s stayed committed through snow, rain, dark mornings, and bloody elbows. Now let’s see how well she executes her race day plan.
T-minus 7 days.
This time next week I’ll be Canada bound. I downloaded that Serial podcast everyone was raving about last year for the 10+ hour drive. Other suggestions welcomed.
Funny thing happened yesterday. Hopped in my car at 4:50am to head to the lake. The sky started lighting up with an impending storm so I turned back for home. Half a mile from my house and the sky opens up. Negative visibility. Crazy winds. Hail.
Due to multiple downed trees, I ended up abandoning my car .25 mile from my house and had to walk home in just my bathing suit and flip flops. I must’ve looked a crazy mess as I flagged down a passing vehicle and informed the man we couldn’t get out of the development. Not gonna lie, still won’t bother to throw on shorts before I leave for my swim tomorrow, I’d rather sleep an extra 20 seconds.
How’s everyone's training going?
Exactly one year ago today I headed out on my last long run for Ironman Mont-Tremblant. I covered 19 euphoric miles in 3 hours. I was absolutely ecstatic. That was my strongest long run EVER. As I rounded the corner to my neighborhood OneRepublic’s Good Life started playing and tears trickled down my cheeks. I was just so proud of myself for making it through training and was really impressed with how strong and unstoppable I felt.
This morning I laced ‘em up and headed out for the same 3 hour run. My last before taper. The make it or break it run. I picked a much hillier route and while I so desperately wanted to get in 19, I figured it’d be closer to 18 due to the elevation.
Nope.
20! This girl just might be ready! And in keeping with Ironman tradition, Good Life played as I finished the last quarter mile. No tears this time though...Ok maybe a few escaped in the car because when you’re happy like a fool, let it take you over. When everything is out, you gotta take it in.
The Posse and I loaded up our cars and took a road trip to Bear Mountain today. Get the title now? Hehe. So dorky.
Big, big, big training day. Lots of climbing. Damnnnnn, that is some workout. You pretty much stay in the easiest gear the entire climb up the mountain. And when I say easiest gear, I do not mean it makes anything about that workout effortless...it is a freaking MOUNTAIN after all.
The Appalachian Trail passes through the road. As we slogged by, the Captain announced, “This is where the REAL climb starts.”
“BUT I’M ALREADY OUT OF GEARS!”
“Me too, see you at the top.” And then he booked it like a rocket while I decided to terminate our friendship because real friends would never talk someone into doing repeats on that beast.
Do you see that elevation gain?! I hope I can walk tomorrow.
Two more hard-effort weeks and then it’s taper time! This summer is breezing by, yes?
All the superficial stuff is mostly healed. But let me tell ya, hitting the pavement at 18mph will mess up a woman’s soft tissue. My hip and femur took most of the impact, and while they didn’t bruise, they did swell and I can’t foam roll without seeing stars. The gash on my elbow is pretty gross and when it scars I’ll be able to audition for a creepy Tim Burton film.
I took 5 days of complete rest after the accident and then slowly started to pick up running. I was spinning easy on the trainer after a week. 10 days post-spill was my first swim and the elbow hurt if I pulled a certain way. It has improved but is definitely not 100%. I did my first long ride this weekend, babying the elbow the whole time as its shock absorption is not stellar, so imagine my surprise when I got off after 5 hours and found my femur all puffy and swollen. What gives? Why are you doing this to me, body? The femur thing threw me because there is no bruising or physical evidence of trauma there so I don’t feel the pain and swelling is justified. If I’m going to be in pain, I damn well should be purple.
Minus the elbow, I look pretty normal but it’s clear to me that I’m still not recovered and more time is needed. The more removed I get from the accident, the more I realize that my body hit the freaking concrete at 18mph and that’s not trauma you just shake off.
So let this serve as a warning to fellow athletes, if you bite it hard and your body looks alright, the inside can still be terribly messed up. Crashes at high speeds are much more than scrapes and bruises.
That’s the text I sent a Posse member after I bit it good on my solo long ride. My first crash, but I lucked out and nothing is broken. I’m just super mashed up. And do you know what the answer was to the text? A soft brush! As in scrub your super raw skin to an even rawer level.
You probably want all the gory details, but I’m afraid it’s not very exciting. There was a long groove in the pavement that perfectly fit my bike tire. Game over. I knew I was going down and tried to jump ship, but there was nothing but concrete to break my fall.
Main objective upon impact was to stop anyone from calling 911. This became super difficult because I was covered in blood and one of the Good Samaritans that stopped was a volunteer firefighter. He kept trying to trick me into agreeing to go the hospital by saying things like “I’ll check my trunk for supplies and then we’ll call the ambulance” and “you’re in really rough shape, we have to get to the hospital.”
They were just scrapes!...ok, my elbow was spurting blood. A lot of blood. But the road rash on my back, hip, and knee were just superficial. I knew I would need irrigation from a professional but I really, really wanted to take a shower after biking for 5 hours in the heat. I didn’t want to spend the rest of the day stuck in an ER covered in sweat, sunscreen, and gravel.
Firefighter Man put out a “be alert” call so an ambulance was on the ready, and three sheriffs showed up with flashing lights blocking lanes on the highway. It was turning into a freaking circus down there and not one of them had a med kit for my leaky elbow. There was much talk about stitches/staples for said elbow among the uniformed men while I muttered about having to swim.
Eventually they found some gauze and my ride arrived. (BTW, when calling for a ride I said, “Hey I crashed pretty bad, I need to get picked up.” Then I saw a pool of my blood on the pavement and added, “whoa, I’m REALLY bleeding.” Try not to say such things to already worried individuals.)
I did end up getting that shower in. I literally spent hours trying to clean the elbow, including cutting black skin and pulling weird things out with tweezers. The gash is two inches long and deep. It’s pretty chewed and will take a long time to heal. I eventually mosied into the ER where it was confirmed that nothing was broken, and while stitches were preferred for the leaky elbow, there was not enough skin left to stitch.
I’m four days post spill and improving everyday. While you all are out there setting lots of PBs, I’m setting my own in rest days. I expect to pick up training by Thursday.
Wear your helmets, kids! Mine cracked in five places.
The Posse and I worked hard this past winter and I was promised I’d see gains on the bike. I finally got a glimpse of the laborious fruits, and I’m jubilant!
There’s this workout that I used to do on the bike that ALWAYS had me on the verge of hurling. By the last climb of the video I’d have to dial back my effort to avoid getting sick. I did the same workout last night. No hurling! Then I did the hard part AGAIN because my plan called for more bike time. Still no hurling!
And when I compared this workout to times past, my pace has drastically improved. Guess there is something to those winter workouts...don’t tell the Captain though, he’ll get a big ego. Eighty days til 140.6!
Does it look like this girl worked hard? Cuz she spent three hours doing 25 hill repeats. AND THEN on the way back home she got the School Zone speed limit sign to clock her at 21 mph. That’s some magic right there. The magic of the two peanut butter sandwiches she scarfed down on her climbs...and Posse company. Oh and a tail wind which is what I mostly credit for my return home. Otherwise, I’d still be 15 miles from home. And hungry.
Excerpt of my climbing convo:
Me: Ok, I’ve got Ironman nutrition questions for ya.
Booth: Shoot.
Me: But first, can the ice cream man get into gated communities?
Guys, he can! Goddammit. I really thought I had the solution to escaping that incessant music box on wheels. I don’t care if it makes me sound 900 years old, I friggin hate ice cream trucks.
