mary shelley writing about a monster rejected and abandoned by its creator and dedicating it to her own father i need to smoke a blunt with her i need to give her head

wylan & kaz, the flipped coin

mahmoud darwish - unfortunately, it was paradise: selected poems, six of crows, six of crows, shadow and bone season 2, crooked kingdom, shakespeare - henry v, six of crows, crooked kingdom, kate bush - never be mine, will wood and the tapeworms - 6up 5oh cop-out (pro/con), six of crows, crooked kingdom, ? , six of crows, crooked kingdom

feeling like pure shit. i think i need to move out of the city in search for an ancient sleeping king, alongside my friends who feel like my family, whom i’d take anywhere with me, whose fates are so tightly intertwined with mine that our connections could withstand the test of time. maybe learn latin, research scottish folklore and historical magic, throw myself into the second chance that life gave me though i know i’m going to die this year anyway but i’ve been told not to waste it though i can’t remember who told me that hmm. yeah i’m in the mood for a little bit of all this tomfoolery and silliness.

be kind to me … or treat me mean … i’ll make the most of it i’m an extraordinary machine

THE LORD OF THE RINGS dir. Peter Jackson

[attempting to flirt] if i was stuck in a timeloop id desperately explain my situation to you every single reset

what a beautiful mess 2 make

Oksana Skorik after Swan Lake in the Mariinsky Theatre, ph. by Catherine Pollak.

maggie stiefvater gutted me alive when she wrote this <3

i love when a character is a ghost but in a tragic way instead of a scary way. i love when a character has been dead from the beginning but is still holding on to stay in the narrative. i love when a character could choose to resent the living but ends up loving them instead. i love when a character drives the story but isn’t quite there enough to be at the center of it. i love when the ghosts are the protectors instead of the ones causing the harm. i love when a character is at the heart of the story because depending on where you began it, no matter how you told it, the story is about the ghost who struggled to keep their humanity

oh yeah don’t mind me i’m just thinking about how blue and gansey are technically the main characters of this story but it’s still not entirely about them and how ronan isn’t the hero of this story but he is the hero of a story that branches off from it and how adam would’ve been the villain in a worse version of the story but he had too much loyalty to the narrative to let his friends go and how the story could never be about noah but it also could never be about anyone except for noah

and he will roam forever, haunting the desert

dead man's hand - lord huron

a dangerous method (2011)

joan of arc in art antonin mercié (1848-1900) / kay nielsen (c. 1914) / jules bastien-lepage (1879) / unknown artist (1837) / christopher whall (1922) / zoé-laure de chatillon (1869)

EMMA. (2020) dir. Autumn de Wilde

thinking about hill house, “no live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality; even larks and katydids are supposed by some to dream,” and the way this became the foundation of every mike flanagan series since. these characters exist under conditions of grief in all its forms. that’s their reality. grief for the dead, grief for the living, grief for themselves, for the dreams laid to rest, the hopes never realized… in hill house, every sibling dreams of something better. they dream of a life — or a death — in which they are unburdened. the shape of this wish is different for each of them, but the wish itself is omnipresent. as kids it manifested in each variation of the red room, something they could “live” in. as adults it manifested as the ghosts they choose to ignore, the ghosts that heal them once they’re seen.

then you have bly manor, where the dream remains the same but the angle and approach are new. hannah dreams just so she can be seen in death. she dreams of the life she could have had with owen, of the love that life left unfulfilled so she plays it out as a ghost. and this tethers her to the physical realm until her ghost, her wish, is acknowledged. rebecca regrets. rebecca is an outlier. she regrets the nature of her death and the life that was stolen from her, but in her death she dreams for those she can push away from her own fate. dani and jamie dream of a life in which they are together, unharmed, and they get to revel in this for a while, and it’s good and it’s peaceful until fate rears its head. but the wish was seen, and so the regret doesn’t exist. hill house says “you have to live / there is no without, i am not gone.” and bly manor says “here is how to live again, even though our roads will meet at the same place.”

and then in the midnight club, this theme persists. and it persists. these kids all exist with the knowledge that they soon won’t. so they dream, they tell stories every night and live out their hopes, put pieces of themselves into the world just so that these pieces can stick around after they’re gone. hill house says “a ghost is a wish / we are all stories in the end,” and the midnight club responds with “a story never dies.” and that’s just how these shows are now. hill house laid the foundations, and every show of mike’s now stands on them. these narratives all haunt each other. if one character starts a thought, a character in a different story will finish it. if one character can’t remain within a dream, a character in another story will live and die in it. the dreams are always different, the grief is always different, but the foundations are the same and the end result is, too: live — choose love and live until your soul is taken. despite, despite, despite.

nobody can exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality, so they dream instead,