are you there, sweetheart?

writing a garbage essay feels like you’re the cow who gave birth to the two headed calf. in the morning, my professor will wrap him in newspaper and dissect him on a cold operating table. but here he is alive, under the pale glow of my computer screen. he is beautiful. there are twice as many logical fallacies as usual.

ive been in this work bathroom for twenty gay years

all of them on the clock, i hope! #wastecompanytime

the holidays are never officially here until i see the christmas light extension cord of death by electricity and I have yet to see it.

gotta do everything myself around here

people keep tagging this as homophobia

can a man not be both pretty and pathetic. a wet rag covered in glitter

reblog to bonk prev with yr forehead like a cat

hey folks,,,,,... glad 2 b here on tubblr . here's a little self-portrait of me,, a human male

on my way to work at the job factory :) lets get this bread !, and by bre,d i mean human money dollars haha. dont even like bred

feeding the ducks

(disclaimer: i do Not live in thi,s pond. i live in a home House.)

ah . allow me to introduce my two lovely childen . Child and Baby . :) they are both just regular Men just like their old man(me)

they're making me scan 80s kentucky fair stuff again and if i have to see the pig ad again my day will be irrevocably ruined

not even half an hour in

worst thing a video game can do is give me a bad reason to kill guys. either give me a very good reason or just say 'there's no good reason, you're playing as a sicko'. don't be like, 'uhhh they are Raiders so you can kill them en masse with unlimited brutality but during our sidequests we will inexplicably provide incongruous moral choices about whether or not it's okay to kill Namedcharacter van der Warcrime'

'do you want to Spare babymunch the evil wizard... or Kill him... or perhaps join him and turn against the village folk 😈 ? this is a world of complex morality......' — a game in which you've killed a triple digit number of human beings

worst thing a video game can do is give me a bad reason to kill guys. either give me a very good reason or just say 'there's no good reason, you're playing as a sicko'. don't be like, 'uhhh they are Raiders so you can kill them en masse with unlimited brutality but during our sidequests we will inexplicably provide incongruous moral choices about whether or not it's okay to kill Namedcharacter van der Warcrime'

'do you want to Spare babymunch the evil wizard... or Kill him... or perhaps join him and turn against the village folk 😈 ? this is a world of complex morality......' — a game in which you've killed a triple digit number of human beings

i hate the expectation that i have to plan for the future. has anyone  ever considered im scared

airport griddlehark from my flight yesterday