Be careful princess 🌸
I just love that multiple people not only though “the black one is a princess and those are her bodyguards” but also came to the conclusion “they’re also, obviously, samurai.”
Smh, why do all these samurai have only one sword?
Craft stores are just like "can I interest you in some...objects? some items? would you like some things?" and every time I'm like Oooh I love objects and items and things!
Evansville Press, Indiana, February 5, 1912
it’s a leap yeap
My nightmare: making a typo that people are still talking about over a century later
Happy leap yeap!
Mitä cybershop yrittää kertoo
Because I just keep finding out people don't know these things!
(I very intentionally didn't go into bra sizing with this post, but yes, if you hate your bras, you are probably wearing the wrong size and/or style for you. That's a much more finicky topic though, so I'm just going to point out that the letter doesn't mean anything about boob size by itself, D isn't big, and Victoria's Secret's "fittings" are garbage. For more info, go to the subreddit for r/abrathatfits, or try their size calculator.)
because ive seen this in published fiction:
boobs do NOT swell with arousal the way a penis increases when erect. the nipples can tighten, harden, and become more sensitive, but it's still not a 1:1 erection situation.
boobs change size over the course of a menstrual cycle, not a single sexual encounter.
if a woman's boobs look bigger because she's horny, it's because she's adjusting her posture and her clothes to emphasize the amount of boob she already has.
Ah, they're probably coming up next! I don't recognise the performance off the top of my head, but doing ballet is HELLISHLY INTENSE and doing it without your muscles througly warmed up is just asking for injured tendrons. In between scenes the dancers literally can't sit still for too long or their muscles will cool down, or worse, cramp up, and if they're not changing costumes they're usually stretching, vigorously massaging their legs and, like here, bouncing around to the tune.
So this is a perfectly natural ballerina behavior. They're just keeping warm and bonding. 👍
I love how the last line has the exact cadence of a "is the ballerina video cute" blog
these ballerinas are not distressed and this in fact good enrichment for ballerinas when confined outside their natural habitat (the stage)
obsessed with this silly tiger
Okay, here's my idea:
The British should put a time limit on the Monarchy.
Not like declaring a republic tomorrow, but deciding on a date in the future that ends the British Monarchy.
And there's a perfect date for it coming up!
October 14th, 2066.
A thousand years since the Battle of Hastings. A thousand years of this one specific bloodline ruling England.
Call time on the Monarchy after exactly one thousand years. Nice, and neat.
Even better: Charles isn't living 44 years. He'll be gone in about twenty. Now William? He's what, 40? Yeah, he can live another 44 years. His great grandmother was over a hundred, his granny was 96, William can make it to 84 barring accident or assassination.
So on October 14th 2066, William the Last steps down a thousand years after William the First won the crown.
Nice, neat, and fair. William gets the crown he's been waiting forty years for already, but ten-year-old George grows up without expectation of it.
Have a nice big abdication ceremony, even.
Plus, what an absolute baller move to announce your regnal name as William the Last.
the Final Bill
This is actually a really good idea, I think.
Gandalf throwing his staff at gollum is what really makes this
Thank you for commenting because I was going to scroll past this.
yesterday for April Fool’s my workplace had a short training article on recognizing computer-generated faces from real ones and one of the tricks mentioned was “count the teeth” and I just wanted to say that it’s both ironic and kind of horrifying how society has unwittingly cycled right back to IF YE MEET A MAN ON THE ROAD, COUNT HIS FINGERS LEST YE DEAL UNKNOWING WITH A FAE
Where’s that image with the self driving car that is trapped in a salt circle made of “do not cross” symbols that its software won’t let it disobey
This one?
Vintage Ghost Holding Candle Horror Poster
armour and intimacy
illustrations in a "gladiatoria" manuscript, bavaria/austria, ca. 1450
source: Krakow, Bibl. Jagiellońska, Berol. mgq 16, fol. 46v, 16r, 47r, and 57v
Her: did you bring protection
Me whipping out 60 lbs of platemail: sure did babe
She corrupts me
And I alike a moth to the flame
Disintegrate in her molten wonder
Sharp teeth piercing ivory skin
She can have all of me
She can have all of me
obsessed with this man...
Why do witches like always wanna fatten kids up before they eat them?? fat is like the grossest part of meat
“Why hello there, little children~. Please follow me to my magical… FITNESS ROOM. NO P A N S I E S ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT. LEAVE YOUR WHINING AT THE DOOR BECAUSE IT’S LEG DAY AND WE’RE ABOUT TO GET R-R-R-RIPPE D.”
Because they’re always cooking said kids in cauldrons and ovens - aka long cooking times at lowish heat. If you do that to fatty meat, the fat melts completely and the meat gets tear-it-apart-with-a-fork soft. If you do it to lean meat, you get tiny little sad meat bits that bring no joy to anyone.
well you did ask
Also there’s wisdom in fattening them up on sweets and other carbs. A meatless, carb-rich diet makes for more tender and flavourful meat.
you are arguing over the semantics of EATING CHILDREN
Well yeah, you gotta get this shit right or it’s a waste of 40-80 lbs of meat.
plus if you feed them a high fat, low nutrition diet, they’re easier to subdue and less likely to run away, which would be a concern for an elderly crone.
Thank you, Old Witch With Candy House side of tumblr.
Tumblr is a multipolyhedron and we keep discovering newer sides.
Either that or it’s an infinite onion.
Lmao at ur tags @rigidly-controlled-dragon
