This week, your little sister’s favorite band, My Chemical Romance, announced that they were breaking up. It was news to us that they were still around, but apparently they’ve been together for the last 12 years, which is 4 times longer than Minor Threat was around. And when you think of it like that, it’s FUCKING DEPRESSING.

Anyway, a group of MCR fanboys/girls put together this online petition for the band to do a farewell tour. And while all those eyeliner sales would be a boost for the economy, we’re gonna have to put our foot down on this one. If we have to deal with a MCR tour the same year as a Fall Out Boy reunion and a new Blink-182 album, we might just drink a whole bottle of Manic Panic until we are dead.

So sign our counter petition to make sure this band stays dead until the end of time. If we get enough signatures, we will walk down to Hot Topic and hand deliver it to them. But probably not. We are lazy.

For a better tomorrow…